Scheherazade Musings Posted March 30, 2004 Share Posted March 30, 2004 I don't want children. Its not because I hate them, its because I know I won't be any good at parenting. I also wouldn't stand the crying. Link to post Share on other sites
fluffy_hime Posted March 30, 2004 Share Posted March 30, 2004 That is, may this have been helped due to the fact that we generally live in post-industrial capitalist societies in which children are economic liabilities? An interesting hypothesis to look into, m'lady. Link to post Share on other sites
Silly Green Monkey Posted March 31, 2004 Author Share Posted March 31, 2004 That certainly was the theme for the episode on TechTV of Wired for Sex when they examined Japanese singles and how they interacted. Space is at a premium in Japan, and raising a child is costly. Even in the outlying agricultural regions of Japan, couples are forgoing children. They say that children are no longer worshipped as a family's dream, and indeed are seen as economic liabilities. The episode featured experts in sex, culture, and statistics among many. Together, they decided that Japan represents the trend that the world will follow, so the birthrate will drop as precipitously across the world as it has done in Japan. The show's predictions are one of the reasons that I think the world population will drop dramatically in the next century. EDIT: I'm an amoeba colony! ••does chicken dance with hooting and jumping up and down•• I'm going to stay a colony for a while, aren't I? Link to post Share on other sites
ehartsay Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 I don't think not wanting to have kids is an asexual thing... We as humans now have our sex drive so separated from our reproductive drive that it is very possible to want to reproduce without wanting to perform the reproductive act (for instance gays and lesbians who want children) and to want to perform the reproductive act without reproducing. Not wanting to have children (ever) is not asexual, it is childfree. Not 'childless', or even 'childless by choice' as some would have it but CHILDFREE This term is a well-established term of a growing social movement dedicated to establishing the choice not to have children as a valid lifestyle option, and to expose 'fambly friendly' discrimination against those w/out children. http://b5.ezboard.com/bchildfree http://b5.ezboard.com/fchildfreefrm2 http://www.nokidding.net/ [/url][/u] Link to post Share on other sites
fluffy_hime Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 Child free eh? I'm all for choice and not having children if you don't want, but do we have to make having them sound like a disease? Link to post Share on other sites
Cate Perfect Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 LOL!@Fluffy It does rather make them sound like diseases, doesn't it? Well...you get kids the same way you can get diseases. Though, 'childfree' does sound like you have no choice--that they just appear and won't go away through no decision of your own. Cate Link to post Share on other sites
Jordan Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 Pets will be the only economic liability I have. Well, I might adopt a kid from China, too. :) Link to post Share on other sites
IT Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 Never been very comfortable around kids. Probably because of the problems associated with feeling different to many others while growing up. Link to post Share on other sites
ehartsay Posted April 18, 2004 Share Posted April 18, 2004 Child free eh? I'm all for choice and not having children if you don't want, but do we have to make having them sound like a disease? Thing is 1. A LOT of people make NOT having children sound like a disease, regardless of whether it is a choice or not. If it is not a choice (i.e. infertility) it IS kind of like a disease or at least malfunction of a kind. Problem is these people look at CHOOSING not to have children for whatever reason as a sign that someone has something seriously wrong with them just because they are not doing what the majority of people do (I'll bet a lot of the people on this board can relate to that ). The sad thing is that I bet a lot of the 'normal' people who have kids don't really 'make a decision' they just do it because they assume that is the way life goes and don't realize they have a choice and so just go along with all the other sheeple. 2. the other available term is 'Childless' or 'Childless by choice' and a lot of people in this class resent the implication that if you choose not to have kids there is something 'less' about your life because of it. For instance as a (current) asexual, I would MUCH rather be called 'Sex-Free' than 'Sex-Less' and I would rather be 'Man-Free' than 'Man-Less' The -Less just gives a bit of a stigma of 'non-completion' to ones lifestyle. In our case there are other terminology choices (asexual, celibate, single, bachelorette, spinster, etc) whereas for the Childfree this is not the case. And I guess to some people to get pregnant and have a baby would be like a horrible disease, one which they would never be free from... And their viewpoint is just as real and valid as that of those to whom getting pregnant and having a baby would be the most wonderfull thing possible... Link to post Share on other sites
Live R Perfect Posted April 18, 2004 Share Posted April 18, 2004 Hee hee! "Sheeple" is such a great word - I must find ways to use it in everyday conversation! :D Link to post Share on other sites
mm10646 Posted April 19, 2004 Share Posted April 19, 2004 my two daughters are the soul of my life but however children in general are not a great source of enjoyment for me. i would not have missed having children for anything. just the sex it took to get them. Link to post Share on other sites
gambit_boi Posted April 19, 2004 Share Posted April 19, 2004 honestly, i love children, and feel really happy when they seem to enjoy my company as well. i volunteer at a "tutoring program" (pretty much the kids run around screaming and one or two settle down to do homework), and i really enjoy that. kids are just neat. and when you can't break the ice with 'em, you can always just ask their favorite dinosaur. Link to post Share on other sites
ehartsay Posted April 20, 2004 Share Posted April 20, 2004 honestly, i love children, and feel really happy when they seem to enjoy my company as well. i volunteer at a "tutoring program" (pretty much the kids run around screaming and one or two settle down to do homework), and i really enjoy that. kids are just neat. and when you can't break the ice with 'em, you can always just ask their favorite dinosaur. Or when they're girls I get to pull out all the fancy makeup and glittery hair acessories I carry in my purse, and we can play with them - and I often have everything from assorted eye pencils, glittery lip glosses and eyeshadows, sparkly powder and scents to full out glitter powder (think Tony and Tina), crystal tatoos and bindis. I haven't met the shy little girl yet who didn't warm up to a little crystal stick on and some glitter. I am sort of a glitter lover so I sometimes try to subtly put on a bit of something sparkly when I am in a pink mood, so I often have all this stuff in my bag for my own use. :oops: Then again often its just powder, liner and gloss when I am in my "Lady Archaeologist" role. And then its just dirt and mud when I am in my actual digging archaeologist gigs. I also let them try on my jewelry (As I wear 6 - 10 pendants, a bracelet with a HUGE [~5 inch diameter] piece of amber and assorted rings and amulets ALL the time this can be quite a production). As I also normally carry assorted amulets (including a small bastet cat, a tiny delicately knapped agate arrow head, a couple of poison rings and a large crystal bead) in a small bag somewhere on my person and occassionally tarot cards there always seems to be something they like if we are meeting for the first time and even later. Link to post Share on other sites
gambit_boi Posted April 20, 2004 Share Posted April 20, 2004 aww! that's cute. reminds me of when me and my sister used to dress up our little brother. i swear, with a dress and some mary janes and that curly mop of his, he looked just like shirley temple. only cuter. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted April 20, 2004 Share Posted April 20, 2004 you can always just ask their favorite dinosaur. *Runs up to gambit_boi* Oh, Deinonychus is the best dinosaur of all!!! *Giggles, runs around, drinks from a juice box, suddenly falls over and takes a nap* What the...? I think I just had a flashback to kindergarten! Link to post Share on other sites
snowplow Posted April 20, 2004 Share Posted April 20, 2004 Not now, but later... I don't want to add another kid to the human population, but might like to adopt. However, I'm not really interested in marrying just to have kids. I learned at a conference last fall that it's possible for singles to adopt. So I might like to adopt a kid when I'm established in my career, which would be some time down the road. But I'd really have to reach a certain comfort level first that I have a reasonable idea of how to parent, because I don't want to pass on the abuse I experienced. I know everything of what NOT to do... but what DOES one do? That I've got to work out through experience with people of all ages first. Link to post Share on other sites
josi Posted May 27, 2004 Share Posted May 27, 2004 I have a child of 12 and adore her (even though she's a little minx), as all mothers adore their children. I have a good relationship with my daughter but unfortunately she sometimes sees me as more a friend or sister than a mother. I'm working on boundaries with her and trying to be more "mumsy". Kids seem to like me but unfortunately their feelings are not returned. When my daughter has her friends round they all want to sit and talk to me, but I find them irritating and can't stand them being in my house for too long . But I'm polite, of course. I have nieces and nephews and love them dearly.....at a distance. I think babies are sweet enough but I see most of them as potential future muggers or murderers :? . I've worked with young kids and hated it......all that noise, lol. I can't stand the majority of teenagers and find myself thinking."it wasn't like this when I was young", lol.....I'm only 36. Even if I could have a miraculous conception, I would never have another child. I'm too selfish and set in my ways I think. I can't stand the chaos that comes with children. Funnily enough though..I don't mind the chaos that comes with animals. Give me a puppy over a baby anytime. I didn't realise there were other women who thought a bit like this...I thought I was just mean :twisted: . josi.x Link to post Share on other sites
fluffy_hime Posted May 27, 2004 Share Posted May 27, 2004 I think babies are sweet enough but I see most of them as potential future muggers or murderers :shock: Link to post Share on other sites
josi Posted May 27, 2004 Share Posted May 27, 2004 Lol....tongue was firmly in cheek there (I think) Link to post Share on other sites
wombat Posted May 27, 2004 Share Posted May 27, 2004 I LOVE KIDDIES!!!! Heck...I'm just an overgrown kid myself! Link to post Share on other sites
Davey Posted May 28, 2004 Share Posted May 28, 2004 I also wanted to apologise to any of you teenage AVENites out there for my earlier comments. I don't really hate all teenagers - just the obnoxious noisy ones!! I'm sure that I myself must have annoyed the hell out of grumpy men on buses when I was younger, though I'm pretty sure I was never THAT loud. Don't worry about it - I hate 96.2 per cent of my demographic too. Link to post Share on other sites
fluffy_hime Posted May 28, 2004 Share Posted May 28, 2004 Davey, is that statistic derived from an empirical survey? ;) Link to post Share on other sites
Davey Posted May 28, 2004 Share Posted May 28, 2004 That depends.. does my ass count as an empirical survey? Link to post Share on other sites
fluffy_hime Posted May 29, 2004 Share Posted May 29, 2004 Yes. Yes, it does. Link to post Share on other sites
Davey Posted May 29, 2004 Share Posted May 29, 2004 Then a resounding 'yes'! Link to post Share on other sites
fluffy_hime Posted May 29, 2004 Share Posted May 29, 2004 ::claps in appreciation:: Link to post Share on other sites
CelibateChick Posted May 29, 2004 Share Posted May 29, 2004 I'm not afraid of kids, actually in some respects I enjoy their company more so than some adults! Kids are pretty honest and usually innocent with such a fresh outlook on life. I've never wanted to have any kids though. It's a personal choice based on my opinion that the world is in such a sorry state, I would not consider bringing another being into it. When I think about the condition of the planet, I feel very sad for the upcoming generations. Link to post Share on other sites
fluffy_hime Posted May 30, 2004 Share Posted May 30, 2004 Nah, human beans are surprisingly adaptable. I got assigned the pre-K and pre-first graders for my YMCA summer program. I'm excited! Link to post Share on other sites
Live R Perfect Posted May 30, 2004 Share Posted May 30, 2004 I was at a family barbecue yesterday with a load of relatives I've not seen for over 10 years, and yet again I found myself trying to avoid the attention of children. They seem to be drawn to me, like cats seem to be drawn to people who don't like them! And the problem with me is I am too soft to tell them to bugger off and I end up giving in to them.... :roll: Gah, I hate having relatives! Link to post Share on other sites
fluffy_hime Posted May 30, 2004 Share Posted May 30, 2004 :D Uncy Liver! :D Link to post Share on other sites
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