Sex(uality) on the Dancefloor

[ariesace]

First AVEN Forums post… phew! Hi everyone

 

Lately I’ve been feeling pretty strongly that I’m ace. I’m not sex-repulsed, and have had sexual relations before, but have never really gotten a whole lot from them. I also know that my sex drive is very erratic and mostly nonexistent. I do not wish to go out and hook up with anyone - it’s possible that I’m demi, but who can never be sure!

 

My question is thus:

Why is it that when I go out to the club with my friends (which I love to do, love dancing!), I have an overwhelming desire to kiss someone on the dance floor? I never flirt with anyone, so it never really shakes out, but then when I leave the club the desire totally disappears - as if it was a mirage. Has anyone felt this way? 

 

My main thought is that it’s a desire for attention/companionship (lol) - but idk, seems a bit weird and counter to my feelings of being ace!

 

Thanks everyone ❤️ can’t wait to dive more into this forum!

[Picklethewickle]

To kiss out of excitement? To kiss out of intimacy? To kiss because you have energy you want to put somewhere? To kiss someone in particular, or to kiss anyone at all?

 

That list of questions is mainly my curiousity to understand you better. It's okay if you don't want to answer.

 

At any rate, asexuality isn't a full-blown dislike or disinterest in all relationships or intimacy. Many asexual people enjoy intimate contact such as kissing, and crave some form of companionship. Mainly asexual people aren't interested in having sex with other people. As for your desire to kiss disappearing after you're done dancing, that could be a response to your situation. The energy of the club and the dancing gets you into the mood for intimacy or attention, but once you leave that setting there is nothing to keep that feeling going.