Did anyone's libido drop when they came out

[Tezzley]

Since coming out as asexual I've noticed my libido has dropped significantly. Before then I was masturbating a lot and would have described myself as a sexual person. Now, I'd say my libido has dropped as much as 90%, which is a huge drop. I've tried watching porn and looking at the things that used to turn me on, but now it seems boring and does nothing for me, in fact very little does. I used to fantisise a lot, now i hardly think about sexual things, and when I do nothing happens anymore (I might as well fantasize about filling in a tex form). I'm wondering if in the past I forced myself to stay sexually active out of expectation and pressure, and now that I've accepted I'm asexual I'm adjusting to what I actually want. It's kind of like going to a party and drinking when you don't want to, and getting drunk because there pressure to be social. In the same way I never wanted to be sexual, but I was forcing myself because that's what you're supposed to do, and now my brain is relaxing knowing there's no need to work hard on it anymore, like my body and mind have jettisoned sexual thoughts and decided there no need for them. And there's no sense of loss, in fact I'm happier knowing that I never have to be sexual again. I'm not sure that makes sense, but if it does let me know

[Monke Jimmy]

It could be because you consciously or subconsciously realized you didn't need to, or it could be that it's because libido drops with time, as you exit puberty or just get older. 

 

When I came out my libido didn't drop

But the beat definitely dropped when I started playing really loud drum and bass 🥁 🪘 🛢 🔊 🎼 🎣 🎸 🪨 🎸 🤘 🥌 👨‍🎤 🗿 

[Philip027]

Never had a libido.  It made the asexuality realization pretty easy.

[ashpenaz]

My libido dropped. I used to think I was graysexual. But now, it would be a very, very light shade of beige.  

[nanogretchen4]

I think before coming out you were in denial and trying very hard to convince yourself that you were a sexual person. You may have "wanted" to do sexual things in the sense that you wanted to be like everyone else and you wanted to conform to social expectations. You wanted to want sexual activity, and you wanted to be seen by yourself and others as someone who wanted sexual activity, but that is not the same as having an intrinsic desire for it.

[Deltalorian]

I fucking wish it did, hasn't yet and I've been out for nearly a year.

[RileyA]

8 hours ago, Tezzley said:

Since coming out as asexual I've noticed my libido has dropped significantly. Before then I was masturbating a lot and would have described myself as a sexual person.

I'm interested in the process of having an at least average libido, masturbating a lot, AND describing yourself as sexual, THEN adopting an asexual label. What was it that led you to that despite the first three points?

[Janus the Fox]

Mine stopped existing but I’d remained to have some functional arousal.  Once my MtF HRT started and gradually over 12 months, even that functional arousal dramatically fell off, this is in stark contrast to most sexual experiences I’ve read online.  Paradoxically, the functional arousal mostly still works through sex with the kinky ace BF.

[Mike D]

I had some libido when I was younger but it drops a bit more every year, it seems.  It's very likely treatable in my case, but I don't care to treat it.  Lack of desire is a blessing, not a curse...it would feel like fixing something that isn't broken.

[cato]

What is libido?

 

...I kid, but it was never there to begin with.  It was kind of my tip-off that I wasn't quite the same as others.