IDK did I do something wrong?

[binary suns]

I like, talked to someone on Reddit about asexuality, because they were talking about their experience and multiple people responded saying "Are you asexual" but they just said "no I like sex" every time

 

so I decided to help them out on understanding that asexuals can like sex and be sex-favorable, and stuff

 

but someone was responding to my post that it sounds really dumb and makes no sense

 

that would probably be due to the fact that I gave two different definitions of asexuality, explained that people call fall under one definition but not the other, and that asexuality is an identity before anything else, so someone might be one of those people who fall under one but not both of the definitions and identify themselves as a sexual person, and that's their call to make, not ours. 

 

It makes me feel like I did something wrong. 

 

 

[Guest]

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[Guest]

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[Ceebs]

There's a difference between an asexual person having sex and saying 'Yeah I see why people like this' and someone having an innate drive for it and liking it so much that they will seek it out repeatedly beyond experimentation or pleasing a partner who isn't asexual. I see no reason for someone who seeks it out to that extent to identify as asexual; it simply makes no sense because that's what sexual people do -- we pursue sex because we really like it.

 

8 hours ago, hois said:

asexuality is an identity before anything else

Well, it's an identity, yeah, but ultimately it's a way of relating to sex and your own desires, and people can be wrong about themselves and identify (in good faith) with a term that doesn't describe their nature. I've been there, done that, several times. Many years ago I thought I might be asexual when I wasn't. I thought I was straight when I was actually bi, then I thought I was a lesbian when I was (still) actually bi. So people can be genuinely mistaken or confused about themselves. It's when they pretty much have irrefutable evidence that they are not the word they're using for themselves and they continue to use that term for some other reason that makes zero logical sense (perhaps they have hangups about sex despite being a sexual person and wish they were asexual... maybe they're bi and ashamed of their attraction to men or women and continue to call themselves straight or gay... whatever) that it becomes an issue of clearly being the wrong terminology and misrepresenting themselves. I do not believe someone who calls themselves asexual but says they love and want sex just as I don't believe someone who calls themselves straight but then repeatedly dates people of the same sex.

 

Anyway. Not sure what you did wrong, I'm a bit confused about the situation you related there.