Any statistics on asexuals?

[frustr8ed]

Hi,

Does anybody have any statistics on asexuality

for example what's the divorce rate between asexuals and sexuals?

what's the suicide rate of asexuals?

what asexuals actually have issues like alcoholism or eating disorders?

I imagine life is tough until someone realizes that they are asexual and that there are other people like them.

any thought on this subject is appreciated

[square peg]

There's no research like that that I've ever been able to find. Only about the figures (1 in 100 people in a survey of Britain) and one about a correlation with poor physical health and being vertically challenged. The correlation isn't absolute though: I'm very healthy relative to the average Westerner, although I am on the short side (5"1). :P

[ghosts]

I don't believe there are any statistics as of now, but I can say that I've never been married, I've never attempted suicide, and I've never had an eating disorder and I'm not an alcoholic (I don't even drink). I can honestly say that life wasn't *that* difficult before I found AVEN just because of the fact that I didn't know there were others out there like me. ;)

[l'héros]

There's no research like that that I've ever been able to find. Only about the figures (1 in 100 people in a survey of Britain) and one about a correlation with poor physical health and being vertically challenged. The correlation isn't absolute though: I'm very healthy relative to the average Westerner, although I am on the short side (5"1). :P

I'm 193cm. That's about 6'2 or 3.

[Bird3490]

I don’t know of any statistics on asexuals, but I myself have attempted suicide before, however it had nothing to do with me being asexual.

[Hallucigenia]

There have been at least 3 scientific papers published on the topic of asexuality to date. Two were by Anthony F. Bogaert of Brock University, and used the data from a British probability sample that wasn't designed specifically for the study of asexuality. The other one was by Cynthia Graham and Nicole Prause and used questions that were focused more strongly on asexuality. That one's newer, and we've got an exclusive article about it coming up in our next issue of AVENues. According to the article, there is a fourth study from another researcher that has been done, but it hasn't been published so no one can talk about it.

Unfortunately, the scientific community is in the very earliest stages of trying to understand asexuality. All the research so far has focused on what defines asexuality (for example, do they have fewer sexual partners, are they more common in a particular age or gender, are they more religious, and so on). And even that isn't nearly done yet. I think it will take a while before we get to more in-depth questions about their quality of life, like the ones you mentioned.

[CopyFox]

There have been at least 3 scientific papers published on the topic of asexuality to date. Two were by Anthony F. Bogaert of Brock University, and used the data from a British probability sample that wasn't designed specifically for the study of asexuality. The other one was by Cynthia Graham and Nicole Prause and used questions that were focused more strongly on asexuality. That one's newer, and we've got an exclusive article about it coming up in our next issue of AVENues. According to the article, there is a fourth study from another researcher that has been done, but it hasn't been published so no one can talk about it.

Unfortunately, the scientific community is in the very earliest stages of trying to understand asexuality. All the research so far has focused on what defines asexuality (for example, do they have fewer sexual partners, are they more common in a particular age or gender, are they more religious, and so on). And even that isn't nearly done yet. I think it will take a while before we get to more in-depth questions about their quality of life, like the ones you mentioned.

I can't wait to see all this information. It's exciting, like making history, you know?

[cijay]

Hi,

Does anybody have any statistics on asexuality

for example what's the divorce rate between asexuals and sexuals?

what's the suicide rate of asexuals?

what asexuals actually have issues like alcoholism or eating disorders?

I imagine life is tough until someone realizes that they are asexual and that there are other people like them.

any thought on this subject is appreciated

Until asexuals 'identify', nobody is going to know this. Many asexuals are in the closet, many are going to doctors because they don't realise this is just the way they are and they want help for it and many are so unconcerned about their asexuality they don't participate in surveys or studies. So it'd be hard to answer percentage anything - including that "1% of the world's population is asexual".

[luvmybabies]

Hi,

Does anybody have any statistics on asexuality

for example what's the divorce rate between asexuals and sexuals?

what's the suicide rate of asexuals?

what asexuals actually have issues like alcoholism or eating disorders?

I imagine life is tough until someone realizes that they are asexual and that there are other people like them.

any thought on this subject is appreciated

Until asexuals 'identify', nobody is going to know this. Many asexuals are in the closet, many are going to doctors because they don't realise this is just the way they are and they want help for it and many are so unconcerned about their asexuality they don't participate in surveys or studies. So it'd be hard to answer percentage anything - including that "1% of the world's population is asexual".

Well, my opinion is that "Asexuality" is something that the world needs to do more research on. There isn't enough known about it to come to any real conclusions, and there may never be. But knowledge is power, so I think it's a possibility that someone is "Asexual". However, I have recently started seeing a new doctor. He is a Doctor; he is a diplomate of the American board of Psychiatry and Neurology and the American Board of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry. He has over 30 years working in his field. I see him for Adult ADD. However, he sees patients for all sorts of reasons. In fact, I found out that not only does he specialize in ADD but he also is a sex therapist. Wow!

So when I was in his office talking about my life, the subject came up about my sex life with my husband. I told him that I figured my husband is an "asexual" (or someone who has no desire or interest for sex either male or females).

He smiled, laughed a little bit, and got very excited about this topic. He didn't say that he didn't believe in asexuality, but it seemed to me, based on his reaction, that he doesn't believe in asexuality. So he jumps over to his very large shelf of books, and grabs a few books on sex. Some of them seemed very good actually. He starts talking to me about my husband, and what the problems are. So I told him that my husband has no interest in sex, blah, blah, blah..........He says that he thinks he can fix this problem, and that in his experience, there are always underlying issues that cause someone to disassociate themselves from sex. There are literally hundreds of reasons why, he says. But mostly they are mental blocks in persons who have either been traumatized or who have suffered some sort of humiliation, or embarrassment when it comes to their anatomy or to sexual issues. For instance, he told me about a man, who, as a very very young toddler, his mother would pour a cup of cold water on his penis every time it would get hard. She did this for the very first few years of his life. Now, he doesn't remember this, but he was told so by his mother years later. Now, as an adult male, he has no desire, and no interest in sex. He is not gay, but just has no desire for it. After years of therapy and digging deeper, it turns out that "Sub-consciously" he had associated his penis getting hard with "negative" feelings. And therefore, pouring the cold water on it, almost shut down the "normal" attributes that a young man may have towards sex and sexual desires.

Now, I am not saying that this is the case, SO please DO NOT shoot the messenger. I am simply re-stating a true story from a professional in his area. He truly believes, based on his years of treating people, that there is not one person that he cannot "Help" with these types of issues. It takes time, but once he gets to the root of the problem, he has tricks that actually work to fix these issues, if the person is willing to be open and honest about everything. He is not referring to homosexuals, so lets be clear on that, rather referring to heterosexuals or homosexuals who simply have no interest or desire in sex at all.

So, I made an appointment with him to meet with me and my husband together, because he believes he can solves these issues that my husband and I are having in the sex department.

I am very excited, but I also have my guard up too. I want sex, very much, but I do not want sex from someone who doesn't want to have it with me.

[Freed_Spirit]

Well, please keep posting if you feel you can - I'd be interested to see how this goes but I kinda feel for your husband at the hands of this guy. For sure the case he described would lead to sexual aversion - but asexies tend to display sexual disinterest more strongly than aversion. Now I've got AVEN, I think even if he could "fix" us I'd run in the opposite direction (don't tell him where I live!). I'm actually really enjoying being me, in the most complete way I have eve done in my whole life.

See, no shooting! (I don't like violence). though, for you luvmybabies, because you are a great supportive sexual and the world needs you. Good luck to you both.

[luvmybabies]

Well, please keep posting if you feel you can - I'd be interested to see how this goes but I kinda feel for your husband at the hands of this guy. For sure the case he described would lead to sexual aversion - but asexies tend to display sexual disinterest more strongly than aversion. Now I've got AVEN, I think even if he could "fix" us I'd run in the opposite direction (don't tell him where I live!). I'm actually really enjoying being me, in the most complete way I have eve done in my whole life.

See, no shooting! (I don't like violence). though, for you luvmybabies, because you are a great supportive sexual and the world needs you. Good luck to you both.

Thanks so much for your kind words. I do not like violence either!

I think that, as adults, we should all be able to be open about these issues and agree to accept each others opinions on things, even if they are not the same opinions that we have for ourselves. I myself, have learned so much in my 35 years alive, just from trying to understand someone else's point of view on situations, even if I do not agree with them. It's an amazing tool that I have picked up on over the years, I wasn't always that way :-) Even just visiting this site regularly and talking with others, has opened up my mind to a whole new set of possibilities that I was not very open to before :-)

It's a great site, so that each of us can learn to understand one another, without (or with very little as possible) criticism.

:D

[CopyFox]

Well, I'm not technically an adult yet, but who cares for technicalities anyway? :lol:

I'm really interested to see how this session goes with you and your husband, luvmybabies. Please post the results of it and any subsequent meetings (I'm pretty sure I heard that psychologists can't make a diagnosis until after 3 or 4 meetings with their patient(s)) you have with your doctor, including things like his techniques and thoughts on the matter.

This makes me wonder how many doctors think we're all head-cases. :(

[luvmybabies]

I will certainly let you all know how things go during our sessions with this doctor. I am very nervous about the entire thing, because I know this makes my husband uncomfortable, to talk about personal issues to a stranger, especially sexual issues. But at the same time, I am excited that he agreed to go right away!! I asked him if he would go, and he wrote me an email back and said "I am open to it" as long as his schedule allows, and it does (hopefully). So far so good. We have the appt scheduled for 5pm on Wednesday, Sept 18th. Got the babysitter all lined up and everything !!

I know that we won't walk away with a whole lot of answers from this very first session, because its only 1 hour long, but I am certain that he will give us a lot of insight right at the very first meeting!! He is a very down to earth doctor, he has the most interesting office too, and bird feeders hanging right outside of his office window, when he needs a break, he just watches the birds eat! I need to step back and learn how to appreciate those calm little things in life!! :-)

[CopyFox]

I will certainly let you all know how things go during our sessions with this doctor. I am very nervous about the entire thing, because I know this makes my husband uncomfortable, to talk about personal issues to a stranger, especially sexual issues. But at the same time, I am excited that he agreed to go right away!! I asked him if he would go, and he wrote me an email back and said "I am open to it" as long as his schedule allows, and it does (hopefully). So far so good. We have the appt scheduled for 5pm on Wednesday, Sept 18th. Got the babysitter all lined up and everything !!

I know that we won't walk away with a whole lot of answers from this very first session, because its only 1 hour long, but I am certain that he will give us a lot of insight right at the very first meeting!! He is a very down to earth doctor, he has the most interesting office too, and bird feeders hanging right outside of his office window, when he needs a break, he just watches the birds eat! I need to step back and learn how to appreciate those calm little things in life!! :-)

Yes, the little things in life can be quite relaxing.

I just wanted to attach a little...I'm not sure, a cautionary word? A reminder? Whatever it is, it's meant to help.

If your husband goes to this doctor and feels that he is being told that he's not normal and needs to become so, he's probably going to turn off to the whole idea. Knowing that your doctor thinks he can "fix" your husband is even more worrying. Perhaps my worries are unfounded, but I just wanted this idea presented.

[luvmybabies]

That is a great point !! That is the one very important point that I learned from the asexuals on this website (and from my husband as well)and that is: asexuals do not want to be "fixed" per say. They don't see anything wrong with themselves. And why should they? Most of them have felt this way their entire lives! So yes, they are normal (in the asexual sense of the word --- Not by a sexual person standards though) !! And with that being said, and since we are all being adults here. I have to say that asexual people seem to be very steadfast on their opinion that they are normal, and do not need to be fixed. And what I mean by that, is simply that, a lot of them do not even seem open to the suggestion that they could be sexual if there was that option (to fix or to change themselves). What I mean is that they don't look at themselves as broken of course, but what about just trying to be more sexual in general?

Or looking forward to change, or bettering yourself in general? Becoming more open? Okay let me give a great "very personal" example of what it is that I am really trying to say here (I'm treading on thin water here, I know that, so I am trying to choose my words wisely here -- as NOT to offend anyone -- but rather to open everyone's thoughts up to different ideas). Okay, my personal example is that a few years ago I was diagnosed with adult ADD. Now, I didn't think I had any problems. Yes, I am often unorganized, and yes I am often juggling 20 things at once, yes I am always late for everything (and will be at my own funeral I hope as well), but my point here, is that even though they say that I have adult ADD. I assumed right away that everyone had it. I just figured that everyone had these traits?? It all seems so normal to me, because that is how I have always been, that is all I have ever known, and I just assumed that it was normal, even though a doctor was telling me otherwise. I didn't agree (at first) But... as I have researched ADD, I have discovered a whole list of possibilities for myself......

[luvmybabies]

Continued.........My Treo Cell phone ran out of typing so I had to start a new reply......Sorry :-)

Anyway, as I was saying.......I have since discovered a whole new set of possibilities for myself since finding out I am an ADD person. One is that, being ADD is not at all a bad thing (and like the asexual person) I refuse, and will not allow, anyone tell me otherwise! There are advantages to having ADD! I can multitask like NOBODYS BUSINESS!! Also, I fear very little in life, and am a go-getter, we ADD folk are normally very fun to be around, and exciting to say the least, spontaneous, and never boring, we go against the rules, and against the grains of life, we go after what we want, take charge, and I even ride my very own motorcycle!! However, with all that being said, well, being spontaneous, and late all the time, and a risk taker has it's own challenges and consequences in life, that aren't always fun! So I have opened up myself to the possibility of CHANGE !! Yes, I am working on changing some of my ways (or faults --- as some may refer to them as)...however, I will always remain me, I will just open myself up to a new and better way of life. I don't want to change the core of who I am, then I would be boring and wouldn't be me, but yet, I am open to being different, different from what I am used to, different from what I would consider "normal"...... and now, very open to trying new things, new ideas, a new way of life and living!! So, I see a doctor, in hopes of becoming wiser, different, and just more well rounded. Now, I will probably always be late, but that doesn't mean that I can't try very hard NOT to be late. Is that fixing myself? Changing who I am inside? Who knows, but I am willing to try. As an ADD woman, mother, and wife, I know that even though I love that part of me, that I may get more pleasure out of life if I can learn to adjust my thinking and my daily activities, to change things and see what happens..........am I making any damn sense? I hope so !

[CopyFox]

Hm...I can see what you're trying to say, but ADD doesn't quite compare to being asexual. Think of it this way: if asexuals need to open up to the possibility of change (which, essentially, means that they need to try to like sex), then why can't sexuals open up to the idea of abandoning it?

...See the dilema?

Now, I'm not saying everyone should stay rigidly where they are and not budge, but I am trying to point out that change is perhaps a two-way street. I can tell that you've had to change your views and opinions a lot in order to accept this community, and that it would only be fair for your husband to be open to the idea of change as well, but what you can't expect to change (if your husband is asexual) is his desire for sex. He may never desire it. That's not to say he won't have it with you, and not to say he won't love you; it's more like, if he does realize that asexuality is his orientation, but he still decides to have sex with you, then he is doing it not because he wants sex, but because he wants YOU and he wants to make you feel loved.

But that's a whole 'nother can of worms, so perhaps we'll come back to this later. "Cross that bridge when we get to it" and all.

[Dame du Lac]

luvmybabies you are making perfect sense and I hope the sessions go well for you both. Whilst I agree with Copyfox that if your husband's orientation is asexual that is unlikely to change as such, from what I've read about ADD (a fascinating subject) it too is very much innate and I completely understand what you are trying to say about making changes that allow you to 'fit' into life more easily without either losing your sense of self or trying to be someone you are not. (I hope that last sentence made sense!)

[luvmybabies]

Well, please keep posting if you feel you can - I'd be interested to see how this goes but I kinda feel for your husband at the hands of this guy. For sure the case he described would lead to sexual aversion - but asexies tend to display sexual disinterest more strongly than aversion. Now I've got AVEN, I think even if he could "fix" us I'd run in the opposite direction (don't tell him where I live!). I'm actually really enjoying being me, in the most complete way I have eve done in my whole life.

See, no shooting! (I don't like violence). though, for you luvmybabies, because you are a great supportive sexual and the world needs you. Good luck to you both.

Hello to everyone,

Well, as you know I had an appt. with this new sex doctor on Tuesday, Sept. 18th at 5pm. However, I found out a few days before my appointment that I had a cystic tumor growing down my left ovary. The doctor wanted to remove it right away in case it erupted in side of me. So I didn't make it to my sex doctor appointment with my husband, instead we were at the hospital all day yesterday. I was in surgery yesterday and am just recovering today. I will reschedule my appointment with the sex doctor as soon as possible though and i will certainly let you all know how it goes.

I am really looking forward to it. Now if I can just recover from this surgery as fast as possible, and move on to more important things, like sex :-)

Cheers,

Luvmybabies

[CopyFox]

Well, please keep posting if you feel you can - I'd be interested to see how this goes but I kinda feel for your husband at the hands of this guy. For sure the case he described would lead to sexual aversion - but asexies tend to display sexual disinterest more strongly than aversion. Now I've got AVEN, I think even if he could "fix" us I'd run in the opposite direction (don't tell him where I live!). I'm actually really enjoying being me, in the most complete way I have eve done in my whole life.

See, no shooting! (I don't like violence). though, for you luvmybabies, because you are a great supportive sexual and the world needs you. Good luck to you both.

Hello to everyone,

Well, as you know I had an appt. with this new sex doctor on Tuesday, Sept. 18th at 5pm. However, I found out a few days before my appointment that I had a cystic tumor growing down my left ovary. The doctor wanted to remove it right away in case it erupted in side of me. So I didn't make it to my sex doctor appointment with my husband, instead we were at the hospital all day yesterday. I was in surgery yesterday and am just recovering today. I will reschedule my appointment with the sex doctor as soon as possible though and i will certainly let you all know how it goes.

I am really looking forward to it. Now if I can just recover from this surgery as fast as possible, and move on to more important things, like sex :-)

Cheers,

Luvmybabies

:shock: Wow, that's...sudden. Weird how life throws things like that at you, huh?

[Tool1989]

I think it's like 1-3% of the world's population is asexual.

[BaronTheCat]

He says that he thinks he can fix this problem, and that in his experience, there are always underlying issues that cause someone to disassociate themselves from sex. There are literally hundreds of reasons why, he says. But mostly they are mental blocks in persons who have either been traumatized or who have suffered some sort of humiliation, or embarrassment when it comes to their anatomy or to sexual issues. For instance, he told me about a man, who, as a very very young toddler, his mother would pour a cup of cold water on his penis every time it would get hard. She did this for the very first few years of his life. Now, he doesn't remember this, but he was told so by his mother years later. Now, as an adult male, he has no desire, and no interest in sex. He is not gay, but just has no desire for it. After years of therapy and digging deeper, it turns out that "Sub-consciously" he had associated his penis getting hard with "negative" feelings. And therefore, pouring the cold water on it, almost shut down the "normal" attributes that a young man may have towards sex and sexual desires.

Now, I am not saying that this is the case, SO please DO NOT shoot the messenger.

This is interesting stuff. It might be so on some occasions, but there are people who by nature have a stronger desire for sex than normal, so if some by nature have less desire for it, it would just seem logic to me.

[CopyFox]

I think it's like 1-3% of the world's population is asexual.

There hasn't been enough research to know for sure. The current estimates are 1% of the population, as a survey in the UK suggests.

[square peg]

luvmybabies you are making perfect sense and I hope the sessions go well for you both. Whilst I agree with Copyfox that if your husband's orientation is asexual that is unlikely to change as such, from what I've read about ADD (a fascinating subject) it too is very much innate and I completely understand what you are trying to say about making changes that allow you to 'fit' into life more easily without either losing your sense of self or trying to be someone you are not. (I hope that last sentence made sense!)

The metabolic disorders and allergies that when combined with the nutritional deficiencies and toxicities now almost universal in the English-speaking world lead to ADD are innate, yes. The negative cognitive consequences are not. If while the numbers of sufferers are increasing, the genes that lend the potential for developing these types of symptoms have not become more numerous, it seems reasonable to assume that those genes cause them only when combined with certain environmental factors. This doctor discusses fascinating studies in depth, looking at everything from hidden gluten intolerance to the various deficiencies the ADHD kids had in common and the results of their intense diet therapy.

I wouldn't be surprised if many cases of asexuality have similar environmental causes (over-vaccination too). In cases where sexual arousal is frequent but unconnected to other people, as for many or most people here, that would seem much less likely. But with related things like sterility, clinical fatigue, headaches, insomnia and depression rates through the roof in recent decades it doesn't seem terribly unlikely that libido could fall to unregistable levels in some for similar environmental reasons that cancers and psychiatric disorders are exploding.

[Dame du Lac]

Unfortunately Square Peg, my first thought on seeing the YouTube video was seventy-nine minutes?! However, I am quite interested in nutrition and its effects on health and do think that the low level of nutrients in modern diets has an impact on our development and health. The abundance of cheap, low quality, processed foods certainly seems to be having a negative effect on our physical well-being (I'm thinking particularly of type II diabetes). I would be suprised if there was no effect on the brain, given its high demand for nutrients.

I'm not, however, convinced that vaccination has a negative effect.

[square peg]

Unfortunately Square Peg, my first thought on seeing the YouTube video was seventy-nine minutes?! However, I am quite interested in nutrition and its effects on health and do think that the low level of nutrients in modern diets has an impact on our development and health. The abundance of cheap, low quality, processed foods certainly seems to be having a negative effect on our physical well-being (I'm thinking particularly of type II diabetes). I would be suprised if there was no effect on the brain, given its high demand for nutrients.

I'm not, however, convinced that vaccination has a negative effect.

I'm aware the video is a little extensive for anyone not already in fairly deep (I'm working towards a career in the field and it was almost too much for me ). Hopefully at least being aware of the existence of one of the most credible-looking and detailed pieces might make people who otherwise wouldn't think much about it take more of an interest anyway. Also if you let it play through once, you can fast-forward it as you please to get a flavour of what's there.

There are (shorter) videos about vaccination on Youtube and lots of websites about it too. I'm not 'convinced' of specific consequences either but all the same until it's scientifically proven by an unbiased source that a) the hundreds of disturbing things widely reported to be in them really aren't, or more likely B) they are but any side effects are worth the damage, I for one won't be subjecting my hypothetical children to them. And I don't even live in the US, where I understand the situation is much more severe. No, I don't believe medical journals to be unbiased sources, and yes it is a dangerous, untrustworthy little world I live in. :( :P

P.S. Buy Organic! Please...