What attracts you to a person?

[StarryNightAllAlone]

@harmonic turquoise Very true. I admire people who are confident and true to themselves.

[StarryNightAllAlone]

On 10/15/2022 at 6:14 PM, SpaceDustbin said:

Kindness and humor are the most important ones, but they must also be the tiniest bit curious to the outside world (outside of their home town or city they studied/work), or at least, not afraid to step out of their comfort zone every now and then

 

Kindness is very important, and humor and curiosity are attractive.

[StarryNightAllAlone]

On 8/13/2022 at 1:41 AM, Baasje said:

People who are genuine, not afraid to be themselves, sometimes "outside the norm" (I've always liked punks and goths on that matter), who are honest and loyal and understanding, and definitely non-judgemental. And those who wouldn't try to fit me into the "norm" and try to turn me into someone I am not, because I'm specific as well, you either love me and take me as a whole or don't take me at all. So, in conclusion, someone I can be myself with. Some level of compassion and empathy would be nice, too.

This right here is perfect. I agree.

[StarryNightAllAlone]

On 8/7/2022 at 2:35 AM, Libellule said:

I find myself drawn to kind, thoughtful and creative people who have similar core values and a similar sense of humour to mine. This applies to both friends and dates.

Absolutely. Kindness and creativity are important. You're smart to consider similar core values. Good answer.

[StarryNightAllAlone]

On 8/13/2022 at 3:36 AM, ThatBadCat said:

Intelligence and competence, kindness, humour.

I agree. Intelligence, kindness, and humor are important.

[StarryNightAllAlone]

On 8/16/2022 at 5:44 AM, Black-purple-grey said:

I'm attracted to creative types with an interest in the arts, introverts, gentle guys who are gentlemen both out and in bed. Guys with high emotional intelligence. 

 

Creativity is a great quality to be attracted to. I like gentle guys, too. I think high emotional intelligence in men is underrated. Great answer.

[StarryNightAllAlone]

On 8/18/2022 at 11:55 AM, vin3g4r said:

During my teenage years I was often asked what my ideal type was, and I've always found it hard to reply. Someone kind with gentle eyes and a nice smile (not talking about teeth or the look of it, it's more about what they communicate with it? I hope it makes sense). Someone smart but not intimidating, who listens when people talk to them. Someone who has similar interests and maybe some different ones, so that we could talk about them and learn new things. Someone funny (it's a plus if they have a nice laugh), loyal, that can accept me as I am, that makes me feel safe. Probably someone that is not too awkward with physical interaction because I am. I don't go crazy for physical interactions but I don't dislike them. As many users above, I have the tend to be attracted to people who stand out for some reason.

Wonderful answer. I like many of the same things in a person. Loyal, accepting, and making you feel safe are important. Intelligence, humility, humor, good listening skills are also important. I think I'm attracted to people that have kind eyes and sweet smiles, too.

[StarryNightAllAlone]

On 8/3/2022 at 11:59 PM, BigBassFox said:

Personality and some common interests, Similar values, and supports me and my identity

All very important qualities. Thanks for your answer.

[StarryNightAllAlone]

@NHD Empathy and compassion are very important qualities in anyone. Respectful people are lovely.

[m8476]

On 8/4/2022 at 2:35 AM, StarryNightAllAlone said:

What attracts you to a person, romantically and/or sexually?

 

Personality wise, I'm attracted to people that are kind, intelligent, creative, eccentric, individualistic, open-minded, curious, calm, and funny. This applies to what I seek in friendships, as well. Physically, I like people with beautiful eyes. I'm not attracted to anyone that is rude, vulgar, mean, overly judgemental, close-minded, pushy, passive, unimaginative, and lacking in manners.

 

 

I seek similar qualities in individuals for both friendships and also potential sexual partners. In addition to the traits you mentioned you like, such as kindness, intelligence, creativity, eccentricity, individualism, open-mindedness, curiosity, calmness, and a sense of humor, in sexual partners I also value a willingness to explore various types of sexual activities beyond conventional intercourse.

[Guest]

Their appearance, the way that they dress, their smile, their facial expressions, their voice, the way they talk, their intelligence, their talents, their social magnetism, their way of being charming.

[Shreddedpotato]

I’m attracted to humor. Also any kind of creative skill. 
 

Aesthetically, I’m attracted to those with nice hair. The haircut can make it or break it for me.

[DeepSeaAce]

I like people who are nice and usually whenever I do get a crush it’s on one of my friends😅 so I usually know the person pretty well before I actually start to develop feelings for them and the common denominator so far is that they’re nice, funny, and sweet. I also like when the person gives small touches like hand/pinky holding or small things like that.

[SkullBee]

As a romantic ace bee, I am romantically attracted to people who are massive sweethearts and are also gentle. When it comes to aesthetic attraction it can be fashion choice or hairstyles such as long hair or semi shaved styles (including certain piercings and tattoo choices).

 

Some of the personality traits that generally repel me would be immaturity (ex. having no will to take responsibility for their actions, pinning the blame on another person or dragging people into their own mess...) and insensitivity.

 

As for crushes, I don't really have any currently. 😅

[Galilei]

I don't experience aesthetic attraction at all, I don't think, this could probably be related to the fact that I can't see. I am honestly questioning if I am aromantic at the moment because I haven't felt truly romantically attracted to anyone in a very long time and I am not sure if the times I felt I have it wasn't just my need to conform to societies norms. 

as far as my friends go, I am attracted to people I can talk to. similar interests and similar thought processes are what I look for in a friend. also people who respect me and understand and take the time to learn and respect my boundaries as a disabled person. This includes the language they use around me and the way they treat my disability. Someone who wants to repeatedly do things for me to make my life or their life easier is probably not someone I am going to want to hang around with for very long.

 

One of my dearest friends, upon meeting me for the first time asked me 'is there anything I can do to help you?' the difference in the way that question was phraised meant that I think I considered him my friend then and there. usually it is an immediate assumed responsibility for anything I am doing at the time because it's just 'easier if I do it, right?' 

 

If I feel safe enough in your company to let you guide me, rather than independently guide myself with my dog or white cane, it is a sign you could be no closer to me as a friend. because it means that I trust you enough that I am willing to hand that control over to you, and there are only 2 people in this world I am that close to.