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Ace people and Dating Apps


RileyA

Ace people and Dating/meeting Apps  

47 members have voted

  1. 1. Do you use dating apps to seek partners?

    • Yes
      9
    • No
      13
    • Have in the past
      16
    • I am not interested in having partners at all
      9
  2. 2. Do you exclusively seek out ace and/or celibate people?

    • Yes
      14
    • No
      14
    • I've never used these apps
      19
  3. 3. If you are open to dating sexually active people, are you willing to "compromise" (have some sexual intimacy)??

    • Yes
      5
    • No
      17
    • Unsure
      18
    • I don't do "partnership"
      7
  4. 4. If you are not open to "compromise", are you open to your partner(s) seeking sexual intimacy elsewhere?

    • Yes
      9
    • No
      9
    • Unsure
      13
    • I'm willing to compromise so no
      5
    • I'm willing to compromise but yes
      2
    • I don't have partners
      9

This poll is closed to new votes


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Just wondering about the ace people I see on dating apps really. 

 

"Compromise" I'm using to mean something along the lines of "allow sexual intimacy" rather than a specific act. However you judge sexual intimacy is fine, it's about whether you'll consent to what you deem sexual intimacy. 

 

The last question is because I'm wondering how many of the monogamous ace people who aren't up for "compromise" are on such apps and open to mixed relationships. 

 

 

 

 

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Guest Invisible Pumpkin

1. Do you use dating apps to seek partners?

I have used those.

 

2. Do you exclusively seek out ace and/or celibate people?
Not exactly, but I ideally would prefer to find someone that's kind of gray/demi/something, that would be open to exploring but are into the whole thing very little and aren't pushy about it.


3. If you are open to dating sexually active people, are you willing to "compromise" (have some sexual intimacy)??
I'm unsure about this, in my mind I say yes, but when I'm in the situation, I just want to run away as far as possible, then I realize I was not ready or into it, and the cycle keeps going...


4. If you are not open to "compromise", are you open to your partner(s) seeking sexual intimacy elsewhere?
Not ideally. I could possibly be in a poly or open thing if I felt very secure that they wouldn't leave me because they are dating other people. I guess, this is related to abandon issues? 

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everywhere and nowhere

Do dating websites count? I only use my computer for doing anything on the internet, my mobile is 22 years old and doesn't know what an "app" is. ;)

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28 minutes ago, everywhere and nowhere said:

Do dating websites count? I only use my computer for doing anything on the internet, my mobile is 22 years old and doesn't know what an "app" is. ;)

 

Lol. I forced my parents into smartphones. One day they forgot Alexa's name: "Alice, Alice, play dusty springfield". 

 

And yes, they count.

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Prior to joining Aven, I did have an occupied account but it was to save quiz results (does okcupid still do the tests? It was also free at the time)

While I had a profile and such, it was not for dating purposes and while I talked to some people on it (a few asexuals included), none of it was for dating.

 

At the time where I lived, the only option would have been a long distance relationship

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everywhere and nowhere
19 minutes ago, RileyA said:

I forced my parents into smartphones.

I won't let myself be forced into using it. I'm a technological conservative and don't enjoy learning to use new devices, and I generally have a classic conservative approach to it: "Why buy a new device if I'm fine with the one I have and don't feel like anything's missing?". Plus I just enjoy Not Doing Things Most People Do And Doing Things Most People Don't - as a result I really feel kinda averse to the idea of getting a smartphone.

Incidentally, my mom uses a smartphone, but I don't. (My father never had a smartphone because he died before the smartphone era.)

I would only happily get a tablet, but without mobile internet, because computer internet is enough for me. I would transfer everything I need with a cable from my computer and would use the tablet mostly for being able to read e-books in my living room. I read paper books in my reclining armchair, and e-books in a chair in front of my computer - as a result, when the book I'm currently reading is an e-book, I spend more time in front of my computer and in the evening my back hurts. :(

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1. Do you use dating apps to seek partners?

I used to use them, but stopped when I realized they weren't doing anything useful for me.

 

2. Do you exclusively seek out ace and/or celibate people?
No.  I don't care whether future partners are ace or not.


3. If you are open to dating sexually active people, are you willing to "compromise" (have some sexual intimacy)??
Absolutely not.


4. If you are not open to "compromise", are you open to your partner(s) seeking sexual intimacy elsewhere?
That would depend on my partner and my dynamic with my partner.

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Anomaly Q3Xr

I have used dating apps a lot, but always stated I am asexual. I don't anymore as I now have a partner (who is also ace, and found via Asexualitic).

 

Before I knew about asexuality, I didn't actively seek out celibate people. I tried to force myself into being sexually intimate, but never could do it.

 

I definitely would never accept a partner finding sexual intimacy elsewhere, and so I would only ever seek out an asexual partner in the future if I ended up single again and decided I wanted to find another relationship. I don't see that happening any time soon (being single again).

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I only go on dating websites if like I'm really "drunk" or something haha or just feeling weirdy weird hyper lol. But not looking for anything serious to be honest. I just have a laugh when bored but I don't go any further. I don't send nudes anymore ever since my ex messed me up stupidly sending a v** to him, regret it. And I don't want d**k pics either from the cis-guys/trans guys/any guy.

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  • 1 month later...

I am currently using dating apps.  I am sex neutral and can appreciate sex if I think about it as a way of expressing emotional intimacy, even though I get absolutely nothing physical out of it.  So, I don't really think of it as compromising, per se?

 

As a grayromantic, it's hard enough to meet people I like at all, before you even layer asexuality into it.  IME, most asexual people are women, and most of the asexuals I've met have been "extremely online," which isn't my thing.  So while I don't object to dating an asexual person if they were the right fit, it's not something I bother looking for explicitly.

 

I'm not sure how I would feel about someone seeking sex outside of our relationship.  I don't think I have a problem with it in theory if it was literally just sex and I couldn't meet their needs despite trying, but I suspect that, even with the best intentions, many open relationships fail because feelings develop with the third person.  My relationship would really have to be failing ("open it or else") before I'd consider.

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In a relationship, so I won't vote on the poll, but this is interesting to me so I'll reply.

 

Never tried dating apps. Before I met my current partner I did try Bumble for a grand total of about 24 hours - someone who I vaguely knew tried to match with me on it and I felt weird and embarrassed so I just deleted the app lmao.

 

I've been with my current partner for 3 years, I've been questioning/considering myself asexual for about one of them. I'm personally okay with compromise for the sake of maintaining the relationship (it is quite possible I'm more on the grey end of the spectrum, time and more self reflection will tell lmao). If in some hypothetical I weren't with my current partner though, I probably would try to seek out a partner who was ace or okay with not much sexual intimacy. I'm also fairly monogamous so I wouldn't be comfortable opening the relationship.

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  • 10 months later...

@RileyA

 

This poll is being locked and moved to the read only Census archive for it's respective year. As part of ongoing Census organisation, and in an attempt to keep the demographics of the polls current with the active user base at the time, the polls will last for one year from now on. However, members are allowed and even encouraged to restart new polls similar to the archived ones if they like them.

  

iff, Census Forum Moderator

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