Complicated

[SamiLynn]

So I've been thinking and I wonder sometimes if my disinterest in sex could be because I can't have children.  A part of me doesn't see the point in sex if I can't conceive a child it makes the whole act seem kinda pointless.  I know that procreation isn't the only reason people have sex, but it's certainly a big one.  Obviously there are other ways for me to become a mother besides the normal means when the time is right.  I do wonder though if perhaps maybe that does play a part in how I feel though.  

[oldgeeza]

I guess you're the only one who really knows the answer to this, I never had any interest in sex, I never saw any need for it, from around the age of 7, I knew I would be single, I knew I wouldn't have children, that marriage would never happen for me,  I tried sex because I was weak and backed down to peer pressure, I hated it, I felt dirty and violated, a few years later I was told that I couldn't father a child due to illness earlier in life and that impotence would and did set in before my twenties, I'm now in my fifties, my last relationship was over thirty years ago, I am happy with the way my life turned out, it was as I thought it would be when I was a child.

[SamiLynn]

@oldgeeza I too came to accept at some point that I would most likely not marry and unless I go through other means would not have a child.  I've never really dated much, but I have always believed at some point I would be married, but it just doesn't seem to be in the cards.

[oldgeeza]

42 minutes ago, SamiLynn said:

@oldgeeza I too came to accept at some point that I would most likely not marry and unless I go through other means would not have a child.  I've never really dated much, but I have always believed at some point I would be married, but it just doesn't seem to be in the cards.

I didn't have many relationships, those I did have didn't last long, my longest relationship lasted 28 days, every partner I had cheated on me, looking back on it now, I can see why, I couldn't satisfy their needs, before I discovered the term asexual and realised that there are others like me, I asked why they cheated, I got two replies from two women who didn't know each other, they more or less said the same thing, I did everything for them, I treated them with respect, but I look old, overweight, I'm ugly, they thought I was desperate, but most of all, they wanted to see if they could still get a guy, when I stopped looking, it was like a weight lifted off my shoulders, now I can go out with friends and I'm totally invisible to women which works for me.