Diagnosed with HSDD

[Sandra P]

Anytone else?

[KAGU143]

Hypoactive sexual disorder is a popular term that some of our detractors trot out in order to try and invalidate the idea that asexuality can be a sexual orientation as valid as any other.

I think that it is probably a real condition in some cases, but, generally speaking, asexuals don't have it.

In order for something to be a disorder it has to be causing the "sufferer" some kind of distress, and asexuals are perfectly content to not want sex.

Someone who genuinely WANTS to want sex should probably seek medical help if they are disturbed by their lack of interest.

-GB

[cait]

I want everyone else to not want sex. Is that a disorder? :o

I've never been diagnosed with hypoactive sexual disorder. I don't know if I would be. But I tend not to fully trust all disorders and the way the terms are used so loosely. It has to get in the way of your personal life and cause a lot of distress in order to be a disorder. And when it comes down to it, all a disorder is is simply a variance from the norm that causes distress. The norm is a pretty tight category to try and fit into, let me tell you.

[Tanwen]

I'd never heard of it. Seems they can put a tag on whatever 'ails' us these days. But, I go with GBRD, it doesn't bother me, no problem therefore no disorder.

[lux]

I've never heard it too,although a psichiatrist told me a long time ago that I was a frigid woman,he was in a big error,I am not frigid,only asexual,I don't like sex at all. :roll:

[Aeriel]

I want everyone else to not want sex. Is that a disorder? :o

... But I tend not to fully trust all disorders and the way the terms are used so loosely. It has to get in the way of your personal life and cause a lot of distress in order to be a disorder. And when it comes down to it, all a disorder is is simply a variance from the norm that causes distress. The norm is a pretty tight category to try and fit into, let me tell you.

Well said, I completely agree.

[IronWulf]

I want everyone else to not want sex. Is that a disorder? :o .

Yes, I think its called insanity.

Other than that, what other people said, it is really only a disorder if it causes undue stress and suffering. Otherwise it's just a different type of normal.

[Dargon]

I took abnormal psychology in college. my professor actually mentioned that some "disorders," really don't fit the definition of disorder. Hypoactive sexual disorder and schizoid personality disorder were two of the ones he mentioned, since the "afflicted" generally isn't distressed by their "disorder." I am confident that I would be diagnosed with both, but as stated above, I'm not distressed in any way by them, and given the option to "cure" them, I'd decline.

[Tanwen]

Maybe psychiatrists think we should all be rogering like rabbits, and anything else needs their expensive attention to be 'cured'...but there are so many 'nasties' that can be caught that way.

[deb]

Hi, well that must be the new psychiatric term. I'm 55, back 30 years ago when you actually drove 60 miles for counseling so no one would find out, I was diagnosed with chronic frigidity or some such freudian thing. Actually, I knew I was asexual (not even a smidgen of interest) way back when I was six. I was playing with a neighbor boy- you know the game, you show me yours, I'll show you mine. He was a lot more fascinated than I was. He wanted to keep looking. I took one look at him and then said-"you ready to go ride bikes?" My ex husband and I went to Denver to visit his sister and my sister. Anyway, the men decided a trip to a xxx porn shop would be the thing to do. I didn't even get a twinge of arousal. My ex tried showing me books of men of different races, books with lesbians, books with a variety of other things. My sister in law and brother in law were all over each other, my sister and her boyfriend were all over each other, and my then husband was upset because I wasn't remotely interested. In my head, I was thinking-we're in Denver for God's sake, you know mountains, the mint, the Coors brewery, the natural history museum and all you can think about is sex and a trip to the porn store, give me a break. Doesn't tend to make for good marital relations. I finally got tired of selling off bits of my soul and dignity just to have someone in my life.

[Lookingman]

Well it is nice to know that there are others who are either unable or unwilling to have a sexual relationship with others. But, still, we asexuals are not exactly bumping into each other as we go about our daily lives. I keep thinking that as I get older, the number of asexuals will increase, if no other reason because of a reduction in hormones or whatever it takes to cause disinterest. For decades I used to read Ann Landers type columns having a recurring complaint that spouse was only interested in acting as though human reproduction was the imperative, and there was no time for hugging, cuddling or tenderness before getting on with the exigencies of copulation.

I always felt that the ulimate intimacy was cuddling and such. I always hoped and dreamed I would find one of those who reflected that same kind of thinking, but it is not meant to be so far... sigh.

[Doorman]

I want everyone else to not want sex. .

:idea: You got me to thinking thats what I want too :o

[thylacine]

Maybe some psychiatrists actually try to help people, but I think most of them just medicalize every day life in order to mass market drugs.

Your feel sad because you lost your job or your dog got run over -- sad isn't normal -- take a pill. Everyone must be happy at all times.

You feel stressed because you're overworked -- stress isn't normal -- take another pill. Everyone must be calm and relaxed at all times.

You're a little tired because you're constantly running around doing so much stuff -- tired isn't normal -- take another pill. Everyone must be perky at all times.

You have a low sex drive or you're asexual -- well, God help you! Here -- take lots of pills!!! Everyone must be oversexed at all times!

Sometimes I think the main goal of psychiatry is to make everyone in society be the same. And no, I'm not a Scientologist -- I just agree with them on a few things!

[Lookingman]

There are at least a few articles in the internet on HSDD: "hypoactive sexual desire disorder".

The articles are quite enlightening. First of all, it is not a disorder if a person has little/no sex desire and is okay with that. All people have little/no sex desire most of the time, else sex desire would be a constant 24/7 every waking second experience. So it is a disorder only if the individual wants/needs (more) sex desire.

Seems to me HSDD is more like color blindness. It is something natural and no big deal unless the individual thinks it is.

Nobody who feels a part of AVEN has HSDD, because it is not a disorder for us. In fact, for us no/low sexual desire is a normal healthy state, not unlike having hypoactive watching football game desire. I've no desire in both areas.

[Sally]

Just read through this thread after having been hit by the umpteenth Cialis commercial. These commercials are the creepiest things I've ever seen -- they are sleazy and sly and smug and yucky. (Other than that...) I think the constant commercialization of sex is just a money-making device; it sells everything. It's amusing to hear someone still say, "Sex is taboo"; hah! Wish it were; then we wouldn't be considered as suffering from a "disorder."

[newgirl]

Why do most therapist want asexual or virgins to have sex before declaring they don't want sex anymore? :roll:

[Sally]

For the same reason mothers want their children to try brussels sprouts before they say they don't like them. "Just TRY it, dear!"

[BleedingThrough]

Why do most therapist want asexual or virgins to have sex before declaring they don't want sex anymore? :roll:

It's stupid. It's like telling a gay man to have sex with a female to see if he really is gay. :roll:

[pinkfizzie]

LOL YOu are right about these ED drugs like Cialis. Geez they do not let older women catch a break. On the funny side I go to several seminars on pharmaco-therapeutic agents and the freebies can be quite something. Like the Levitra pen that slooks natural when you press a button. I give the viagra stuff out to friends as a joke. I hear this junk even sells on ebay.

[rhyven]

Otherwise it's just a different type of normal.

i love this line. made me stop and go: "ummm"

thanks for posting it.

:D