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Personal essays about being asexual


hope_dean

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Hi everyone! I recently wrote a personal essay about being asexual for Atrium Magazine: https://atriummag.org/the-angst-of-ace/

 

I was hoping we could create a space here for others who want to post their own personal essays, or share other personal essays about ace-ness that they enjoyed. I love hearing other people's stories!

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It's so beautiful!!! I.. I'm speechless, honestly. Your post made my day in a wholesome but bittersweet mood somehow. Your writing style is excellent and it hooked me right from the start. Great job!

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Blueberry Pie

I love your essay! 

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This is really powerful, thank you so much for sharing it. 💜

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I LOVE it!! You have an amazing writing style and capture yor experiences in such a lovely and mature way, and the photos give it a wonderful artistic touch! Your article made my day, thanks for sharing 💜

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  • 4 weeks later...
queer_kaleidoscope

I loved your essay, it was so wonderfully written! Thanks for sharing :)

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  • 1 month later...

That was absolutely amazing 💜

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  • 3 months later...
On 3/25/2022 at 3:39 PM, hope_dean said:

Hi everyone! I recently wrote a personal essay about being asexual for Atrium Magazine: https://atriummag.org/the-angst-of-ace/

 

I was hoping we could create a space here for others who want to post their own personal essays, or share other personal essays about ace-ness that they enjoyed. I love hearing other people's stories!

I love this essay!! Beautiful!

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oh, man.  That hit hard.

I've had a good cry about it.

 

You and I have had different experiences, because we grew up in different times and places, but if I had grown up in your family and at your school, that would have been my story too.  It was true for me in the way that the truth of ideas shines through the particulars of fact.

 

and I am blown away that at 22 you had this story to tell.  I could not have told such a story about my own life without another ten or fifteen years of life experience to help me put all of the pieces together. (You see, while you learned that asexuality existed as a teenager, I did not learn that same information until I was in my 30s.  And by that point, I had twice as much life experience to have to go back and unpack and reexamine through that lens. And it took time.)  I am not jealous.  My story is my story, and I own it.  But nevertheless, I am blown away by yours.

And also so proud of you for being able to share it in this way.

I think it may become one of the new pieces that I share with people when I want them to understand a bit of what the asexual experience is like.

 

 

I do a lot of writing. Not like journal entries, but in generas of writing that move back and forth on the spectrum between personal essay and letter writing (though frequently without sending the letter, often deleting it after its finished.)  It's a way I try to find patterns in my life.  Writing things in this way as though for an outside audience forces me to explain my thoughts in a way that would make them clear to another reader, and forces me to seek out structure and paradigm in a way I might not if I were writing only for myself.  But while I have done this sort of writing over and over again, I'm still not ready to publish a piece like this, about my ace experience.  

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  • 4 months later...

Thank you for sharing this! I've done a lot of creative fiction and some creative  non-fiction before, and seeing this has got me wondering if I want to try to write something more formal about my own realization/coming out journey. It's long and took me a while (I'm 31 and just finished admitting it to myself a few weeks ago, and only started suspecting seriously a few months back, after knowing Something Is Different since I was a teen) and doesn't match up to most stories I hear, so it probably can't hurt to try...

 

I hope your story helps other people feel less alone, and maybe recognize their own feelings! (And write down their own stories, too!)

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  • 2 months later...
SplitTheLark

Thanks for sharing this essay! I found it really powerful. And thanks for creating this thread!

I recently had an essay about being aro-ace published in The Spectacle literary journal. It's titled "A: An Echolocation"

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@SplitTheLark thank you for sharing your essay - the journey to where you are is powerful. It is a source of strength to those who (like me) are finding their way. When I was young, there was no shared experience for this, only a sense of being wrong and needing to fix my problem in a world where everything is infused and enmeshed with sexuality.  I hope that writers such as yourself continue to explore and present asexuality as a normal human experience so that it can be embraced and accepted without the sense of shame, anxiety, sadness or judgement that often pushes us down. I look forward to reading more of your writing. 

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Thank you so much for sharing.

 

I related to a lot about your story: growing up in a Christian environment, the lack of family's understanding (I've been too scared to even fully come out to them and a lot of people in my community; I just sort of hint at it).  Thank you for sharing your experiences, I feel a little less alone.

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SplitTheLark

@Jane_lowThanks for your kind words! I am indeed writing quite a bit about asexuality these days.

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