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21 minutes ago, Traveler40 said:

I’d love you to anyhow. ♥️

Aw, thanks.  :)

 

Agreed that Tele contributed a lot to the spirit of discussion.

 

23 minutes ago, Traveler40 said:

Folks are here to rage, be sad or commiserate it appears.

Agreed on this as well.  And while I get that my input there is not very helpful.  They feel worse, I feel worse.  No win!

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On the actual topic, while I’ve moved on to drawing/painting these days, I am (I was?) a fanfic writer and have written at least one long relationship story involving a mixed-orientation couple.  That’s not the point of the story, though; it’s just one of many obstacles the characters navigate.  As others have said I’m not sure those portions of the story serve any particular purpose to non-ace readers.

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Agreed - and as stated, it would go over most people’s heads. It’s the old meaning-memory dichotomy. Even if I had heard about asexuality (in whatever form) before it came into my life meaningfully, I would have never remembered it!

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2 hours ago, Traveler40 said:

So now what? Do we throw his ashes overboard? This feels funeralesque…

 

Oh Tele, you SO want to say something. Too bad, so sad! Be happy you’re missed mate! Well, at least by all but one of us…😉 

[Sappiness ahead, just a warning..]

 

Haha... I miss him round here all the time, even as I'm talking to him and sending him screenshots of threads lol. I'll have to get him to read this stuff in the morning, since SPFA is visible without being logged into an account. Despite spending many hours every day talking, I really still miss having this as a place together and messing about on here. We always had a... dynamic. There wouldn't be a relationship without the space AVEN provided for that to develop. When he was first booted back in 2019 and we weren't yet A Thing, our email communication was pretty sporadic (this is long before I ended up asking you for advice haha), and damn that hit me so hard. I was trying to make another (faltering and unhealthy) relationship work and also slowly coming to the realisation that I was used to him being part of my day, every day, here on AVEN, in threads and PMs, and suddenly that daily interaction was gone and it was hard to think up a reason to email constantly. The idea of losing a connection that felt so much like it was supposed to be... something... was breaking my heart. Ever google 'how to get over someone you've never dated'? I have. 😂 Anyway. You know how that panned out. The emails didn't die out after all. They all have song lyrics as titles lol. Simon and Garfunkel, Eurythmics, I forget what else. After I sent one full of a bunch of dumping of personal emotional shit and his reply started with 'Oh, sweetheart' (good lord, I stared that over and over and over), I was just like... come on, how is this entirely platonic anymore?! A few weeks later, a switch to Skype, a few drinks, and it wasn't.
 

Next step is being on the same side of the goddamn Atlantic.

 

But yeah, AVEN's not the same without him. I wouldn't be either. I've never loved or been loved as much in my life. I intend to keep being an irritating reminder of his continued existence in the world at least. 😂

 

(Ok done with the sap.)

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Also yes, SPFA has a much less conversational vibe. I post plenty of places outside of SPFA, but in all honesty AVEN in general feels... lacking... these days. There's JFF for chatter I suppose, but I often feel out of place there. There are other sexuality and relationship sections, and those are kind of just the same recycled topics and lots of definition debating. There's Hot Box and PP&S, but I avoid them a lot because even for a pretty progressive leftie, I have views that AVEN doesn't like and I don't want to be yelled at or warned or banned over things that aren't worth it.

 

So yeah, it feels different. But after 18 years I can't leave...

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2 hours ago, Traveler40 said:

Even if I had heard about asexuality (in whatever form) before it came into my life meaningfully, I would have never remembered it!

Huh.  For me, the less familiar I am with something I run across, the more I want to learn about and understand it.  I may never employ it personally (or agree with it, or even not find it profoundly upsetting), but if I don’t know about it I need to.

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1 hour ago, ryn2 said:

if I don’t know about it I need to

Yes and this is how I end up googling things like 'what's the most popular supermarket chain in Ukraine' at 2.38 in the morning or whatever.

 

I've just completed an internet rabbit hole excursion that began with a Google search of a British comedian who died today and was a regular on a BBC radio show, took a detour to another British guy who used to be on a BBC radio show I loved and was outed as a paedophile, onto one the daughters of the creepy guy who's a BBC journalist, onto her daughter/creepy guy's granddaughter who's an author, onto another of creepy guy's granddaughters who's apparently a wannabe singer and did a stint in rehab for something and whose other grandfather is media tycoon Rupert Murdoch and who has really (really really really!) massive tits (can we say 'tits' on here?), and ended up at a search for 'how do people with big boobs sleep'. Man, I'm grateful for my small boobs that allow me to sleep on my stomach. 

 

If that doesn't sound intellectual enough, my other obsession lately is postmodernist philosophy. I kinda hate it but I'm fascinated by its influence on identity politics, which I also dislike, so.

 

I can derail any thread. 😎

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34 minutes ago, Ceebs. said:

Yes and this is how I end up googling things like 'what's the most popular supermarket chain in Ukraine' at 2.38 in the morning or whatever.

Yes!!

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3 minutes ago, ryn2 said:

Yes!!

Sometimes you just have to know these things.

 

I mean, if one interprets 'have to' fairly liberally.

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Just now, Ceebs. said:

Sometimes you just have to know these things.

 

I mean, if one interprets 'have to' fairly liberally.

Oh, for sure.  Every time I read something I don’t know or can’t envision, off I go.  It was a lot more of a pain pre-internet.

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Just now, ryn2 said:

Oh, for sure.  Every time I read something I don’t know or can’t envision, off I go.  It was a lot more of a pain pre-internet.

Oh yeah, I remember that well. My parents had lots of reference books at least, although many of them quite outdated. I recall poring over my dad's atlas from university. He graduated in 1962. 😅 I also used to make lists of subjects to find books on next time I was at the library, and then I'd come home with a stack of like 20 books. After the internet was more common and the library had computers for patrons to use, my lists of subjects became lists of things to google while I was there as well. That was well into my 20s since I didn't have home internet access until I was about 24.

 

#nerd

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I was all awww 🥰 Ceebs and Tele and 😢 ♥️.

 

Then you two had to juke hard into oblivion! Haha. I have zero clue what that’s like and somehow feel I'm happier for it! I mean, NO! Haha

 

Seriously miss the conversational vibe. I’m not here for therapy. Honestly, sometimes it’s the snacks 😁, but mainly it’s habitual. Tele seemed to breathe fresh air into the place and  yeah, central perk it up! 
 

But popular supermarkets in the Ukraine at 2.38am? Uh, I have nothing to contribute there.

 

🤔 nope, not yet!….

 

(Why, oh why do I love emojis so? It’s a lonely space….😂🙄.)
 

So yeah, y’all may be nerds and all, but know you’re officially with someone here who’s all #rathernotknow. 🙃

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9 hours ago, ryn2 said:

Huh.  For me, the less familiar I am with something I run across, the more I want to learn about and understand it.  I may never employ it personally (or agree with it, or even not find it profoundly upsetting), but if I don’t know about it I need to.

And wow, I wish I had that kind of time! Frankly, I blame the kids. It’s convenient and true. The second to leave has about 10-12 years left. Maybe I’ll perk up mentally then? 🙄
 

Seriously though, if something piqued my interest, I’m inside out girl. Otherwise? Fuggetaboutit.

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8 minutes ago, Traveler40 said:

I was all awww 🥰 Ceebs and Tele and 😢 ♥️.

I mean, we are adorable. 😎

 

9 minutes ago, Traveler40 said:

Then you two had to juke hard into oblivion! Haha. I have zero clue what that’s like and somehow feel I'm happier for it! 

You might be, yeah. I theorise that people whose brains work more like yours must have a less cluttered headspace and be a lot more effectual as a whole. I'm envious of that... I'm in my head so much of the time, overanalysing, overthinking, overfeeling... good god, the overfeeling (is that even a word?). Double-edged sword there. Getting out of my head and into the world is hard for me. Which leads to lots of nerdery and accumulation of totally useless information. When I was about 14, some classmates dubbed me The Queen of Useless Information cos I used to win our science teacher's end-of-the-week trivia quiz nearly every week (not related to class material in any way, not even science-related necessarily, just totally random questions, and as a nerd I loved it).

 

But hey, Tele's a massive nerd too and I haven't had someone appreciate my nerdery or my emotions as much before. He's a sappy bugger. It's wonderful. 

 

And you know, I did actually have to google the thing about Ukrainian stores. And then I ended up on the website of one. They have some really cool socks on sale this week that I want, with monsters on them. 😂

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So, here’s a fun fact: My lover (who thinks he’s the funniest man alive and has a point) appreciates that I remember exactly zero jokes. His rolodex of humor is now endless. 😂

 

So, sometimes it’s inconvenient to have a head full of spacious rooms by design, but mostly, I decide what goes where and how at all times. Otherwise? I purge. Yes, it makes me quite productive. My assistant often says I do in 2 hours what it takes them 8 to achieve. 😬Efficiency baby! Ha. 
 

Emotions though... I wish there was a bit more sap in my life. Enjoy that fully 💕
 

Lover? He thinks my fact drop on useless tidbits endearing, to which I rebuke with practical. Whichever, he’s most welcome as he gets to be the funny man over and over and over again. 

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7 hours ago, Ceebs. said:

I also used to make lists of subjects to find books on next time I was at the library, and then I'd come home with a stack of like 20 books

Also, microfiche!  I spent a lot of time in the microfiche reader, lol.

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6 hours ago, Traveler40 said:

wow, I wish I had that kind of time!

With the Internet, it takes very little time.  I’m a fast reader and fast learner.

 

6 hours ago, Traveler40 said:

Seriously though, if something peaks my interest, I’m inside out girl. Otherwise? Fuggetaboutit.

Same, I suppose.  My interest is just piqued by discovering something I don’t know.

 

5 hours ago, Ceebs. said:

I haven't had someone appreciate my nerdery

Yes, it’s always more pleasant to be with someone who thinks it’s good than someone who thinks it’s bizarre.

 

5 hours ago, Ceebs. said:

I did actually have to google the thing about Ukrainian stores

I successfully fought it off, because I had actual work I had to finish up, but I may still look given cute monster socks.  XD

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6 hours ago, Traveler40 said:

somehow feel I'm happier for it!

 

6 hours ago, Ceebs. said:

Double-edged sword there.

I don’t think intellectual curiosity itself leads to any unhappiness for me but agreed that it comes bundled with other things that do.

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Piqued 🙄 Which I KNOW! So yeah, that’s a type A irritation of grand proportions. Fixed BTW!  Spell check and speech to text thwart me often, but that typo was all me.

 

As to intellectual curiosity, I definitely have it, it manifests differently. I need to have an interest is all. I’m not “for the sake of knowing”. There’s a bit about retention that’s problematic here. If I don’t give a care, I will purge which then seems a waste of time and energy. 
 

If you talk to me about my work, you’d be in shock and awe given I live and love it and it shows. Popular Ukrainian supermarkets? 🤔 Nope! (At 2.38am? Hell no!)

 

Thanks for that example Ceebs…may be a thing to reference. Haha

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See…now I’m struggling to recall another great reference from Tele via Ceebs some time ago.

 

Flarffing? Could that be it?

 

As in, “My husband flarffs about.” 
 

EDIT: So I Googled it and, um, what? Maybe that isn’t it. See? Purged. Haha

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6 hours ago, Traveler40 said:

Emotions though... I wish there was a bit more sap in my life. Enjoy that fully 💕

Mmm I do, so much. It's lovely.

 

51 minutes ago, ryn2 said:

Also, microfiche!  I spent a lot of time in the microfiche reader, lol.

Yes! I got obsessed with that for a while when I was researching my grandad's death in 1950, which was... kind of mysterious... and made the local newspaper. I ended up obsessed with reading old newspapers that way in general.

 

27 minutes ago, ryn2 said:

I don’t think intellectual curiosity itself leads to any unhappiness for me but agreed that it comes bundled with other things that do.

Yeah not so much the intellectual curiosity bit, but the intense emotional stuff. I am very very... very... sensitive, and it means the good things in life are absolutely mind-blowingly wonderful and that joy feels like a spiritual experience of some sort, and the lows are overwhelming and devastating and unbearably painful and my brain gets really... dark. I don't think I'd want to not have that emotional intensity, but it's got downsides for sure. Tele's said many times that he needs that from someone though, the strong emotions... so that's a positive. I'm not used to people appreciating that trait.

 

Actually the intellectual stuff might have some downsides too lol. I get lost down my research rabbit holes for hours, learning completely useless shit, instead of attending to important things I really ought to do.

 

Oh the monster socks reminded me of these that I bought recently. Tele finds my love of them adorable, apparently. (Yes they're actually made for adults lol.)

 

2-E408501-8-E2-F-46-C3-B953-DAFC80-BA437

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14 minutes ago, Traveler40 said:

See…now I’m struggling to recall another great reference from Tele via Ceebs some time ago.

 

Flarffing? Could that be it?

 

As in, “My husband flarffs about.” 

'Faffing'. 😂

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Please define and use in a sentence, because the flarf bit is a MASSIVE miss! Haha

 

And I debated on doling out that last like given the absolute outrageousness of those slippers. My kids would love them 😱


 

GOT IT!

C838-C23-B-7-FBC-4-E7-C-BE84-AD22-A2-C56

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'He spent ages faffing about instead of getting ready for work.'

 

'After dinner, she spent the rest of the evening just faffing about.'

 

'I wish you'd stop faffing about and do something useful instead!'

 

 

It's basically just spending time doing random shit that probably isn't of the utmost importance.

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You should be so proud, I used postimages and everything! So, as for outrageous footwear, I saw these and almost bought for my lover. However, knowing him and his desire to never waste, he’d actually WEAR THEM! 😬 Haha. Um, no.

Spoiler

6586-FAD1-C234-41-B4-AB3-B-ADD9-E6-A3-DB

 

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17 minutes ago, Traveler40 said:

And I debated on doling out that last like given the absolute outrageousness of those slippers.

They're amazing. So fuzzy, and they make a pleasing floppy sound when I walk. :wub: (Ha, I accidentally typed 'wank' there...)

 

2 minutes ago, Traveler40 said:

However, knowing him as I do and his desire to never waste, he’d WEAR THEM! Haha. Um, no.

See now if I gave those to someone, I sure hope they'd wear them. 😂

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I have never worn slippers in my life as it’s barefoot or flip flops here. Our floors are mainly all stone, but it’s hardly cold enough for me to wrap my feet in anything. When we go to the mountains, it’s heated floors, so no slippers required! 🙌🏼

 

My lover has a sweatshirt someone bought him that he wears around the house once in a blue moon. It says “Czech me out!”.  Um…🤭

 

and no, I wouldn’t hope he wears it anywhere other than painting or gardening of which he does neither. DONATE STAT is my thought! Haha

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1 hour ago, Ceebs. said:

Actually the intellectual stuff might have some downsides too lol. I get lost down my research rabbit holes for hours, learning completely useless shit, instead of attending to important things I really ought to do.

It can definitely be a great way to procrastinate but I also know from experience that *not* doing it doesn’t stop procrastination.  XD

 

1 hour ago, Traveler40 said:

If I don’t give a care, I will purge which then seems a waste of time and energy. 

If I initially learn about something and it ends up being boring I won’t pursue it further, but once the information is in there, it’s in there.  Just how my brain works.

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Those slippers are hilarious but I think they would be incompatible with cats.

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1 hour ago, ryn2 said:

Those slippers are hilarious but I think they would be incompatible with cats.

I disagree as the cats would love them….😂

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