anyone else just feel really apathetic?

[failing adult]

hi yeah im in my second year of college and from the start ive struggled to care the slightest bit about achieving grades or just passing.

obviously, the pandemic didn't help that one bit and today really sealed the deal. I found out this morning I have a biology test (which are important now since we switched to a bunch of assessments making up our final grades over the traditional end of year exams) and I just, I thought it was next week? but we have a different biology test next week and I got confused and then I just couldn't make myself leave the house. 

I just couldn't get up and get dressed to do a test i give absolutely zero shits about, in a building that makes me so uncomfortable and just sad. 

And I just, don't care? like my teacher emailed me asking why I wasn't in and that I couldn't make up this test next week and I've just ignored him? I can't make myself care and Im planning on emailing him in a minute and just asking him to fail me because I do not have it in me to try. 

anyway if u actually read that, kudos to you, feel free to share your own apathy or just bad days

[a little annihilation]

I can and cannot relate to the aspect of not caring about school because I'm an intense perfectionist, but on the other hand I couldn't do school anymore so much that I dropped out with no warning so 🤷‍♀️

It is very very hard to care, on the part that unless you have a very specific goal for yourself or career you wanna get, there comes a time that school is 100% pointless, say whatever you want about education and what school teaches you, not just academically but in life, but it's true.

Personally I am more apathetic from a social/ emotional stance (e.i. I don't give a shit that your dog died and maybe that's a bad example because in general I just hate dogs) and I can say without a doubt that I flat out do not love my family, not even in the way that people who strongly dislike their family still do.

woops maybe that's coming on a little strong. 

well it's true, we're talking about apathy aren't we.

[camillosan]

I can relate to this a lot, I'm feeling almost the exact same. Ever since I started my studies actually but the pandemic has just made everything much worse. I'm still trying to hand in my work, sometimes I fail though...but I just can't be bothered most of the time. I also had to email one of my teachers about an important homework I didn't hand in and I hope they'll just fail me. It felt impossible to do the first time and I'm sure that won't change if I have to try again.  I don't even care about the degree that I'm doing, I'm literally just in it to do a degree because that's what people do. I don't even know what I want anymore, everything feels kind of stagnant atm.

[Grey-Ace Ventura]

I can relate, friend. I feel like it's partly because of my potential ADHD but also just my general nature, but I just really don't give two shits about my schoolwork. Deadlines and stuff have no effect on me, and I've always had trouble turning stuff in on time. Pretty much the only exceptions are things like my first Computer Science class and Japanese because those are things I really like, but even then, I still struggle to do my work for those classes sometimes. Chemistry I epically failed this semester because I never went to most of our virtual classes and watched them all at the last minute the day of our exams, and I also never did the homework. I know I'm going to have to figure out a way to care more, partly because of my scholarships, but also partly because of my major.

[Snao Cone]

This sounds like a form of depression, and if you are able to you should talk to a professional about it. Sometimes we get exhausted when things are overwhelming, but if it turns into persistent apathy then that might be treatable. 

 

I have dysthymia, or daily mild depression, and it makes it hard for me to care about anything or bother doing anything beyond what's absolutely necessary. There are mental exercises I do to push through that, like writing down what I need to do and why, or setting harder deadlines, or just physically doing them while debating whether I should do them (which is only applicable for physical tasks like cleaning or going places). 

 

Anyway, this isn't simply choosing not to care, nor is it laziness. This is a matter of mental health and it's okay to seek help for it. 

[GingerRose]

4 hours ago, failing adult said:

hi yeah im in my second year of college and from the start ive struggled to care the slightest bit about achieving grades or just passing.

obviously, the pandemic didn't help that one bit and today really sealed the deal. I found out this morning I have a biology test (which are important now since we switched to a bunch of assessments making up our final grades over the traditional end of year exams) and I just, I thought it was next week? but we have a different biology test next week and I got confused and then I just couldn't make myself leave the house. 

I just couldn't get up and get dressed to do a test i give absolutely zero shits about, in a building that makes me so uncomfortable and just sad. 

And I just, don't care? like my teacher emailed me asking why I wasn't in and that I couldn't make up this test next week and I've just ignored him? I can't make myself care and Im planning on emailing him in a minute and just asking him to fail me because I do not have it in me to try. 

anyway if u actually read that, kudos to you, feel free to share your own apathy or just bad days

Yes, I'm feeling very apathetic and I'm not sure if it's my depression coming back or if it's just a bit of pandemic lock down setting in. Maybe both.

When you said second year of college though, I knew exactly what you were referring to, that year for me too had a lot of  frustrating lazy like feelings. For me it was because I was transferring to a new uni, and I wanted to be done with school, but I'm sure lots of people feel that way. It's like being back in secondary school. You have excitement for college then you realize you're back to the grind of assignments and grades again. As you said, it probably has a lot to do with the pandemic as well, it's difficult to get up and do things when you're used to staying in all the time.

 

I've since graduated, but I came up with some ways to help me not feel so apathetic and overwhelmed when it came to uni.

 

What are you studying in uni? It helps me to think about this because then I see it as me getting closer to my goal. With success, comes challenges like some classes.

 

Reach out to your teacher, uni teachers can be really supportive and empathetic. Let them know how you're feeling, tell them honestly why you haven't come in. They might be able to help you organise your assignments and get you back on track.

 

Speak to a school counselor, there is usually a counselling office on campus, it's free and they help students overcome all sorts of school apathies and worries.

You can even look into tutoring, for help with your classes.

 

Give your uni life a pump. Sure most of uni is about school classes, but it can be about a lot more. Join a club, visit a nearbye park, eat somewhere new. I was so surprised how much joining a club did for my mental health.

 

And overall, make sure your wellness is on track. Try my Mental Health Learner Series, I will be talking about wellness soon on there. Think about your emotional, physical, spiritual, environmental, and social needs...are they being met? If not, how can you make that happen?

[WarRocketAjax]

All the time.