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How do we heal from this?


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Sarah-Sylvia

There's so much division around,  it's hard to say what will help people heal and listen and try to understand each others' values and how certain things can be important.
Those bills are pretty bad for the trans people in those states, and I can only hope that as people fight less, understanding will come around. But a lot of people are still fighting.

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LeRatatouille

I feel sorry for you and all transgenders. To be honest I couldn't read it thoroughly. I don't even know how to heal

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Sarah-Sylvia
4 minutes ago, LeRatatouille said:

I feel sorry for you and all transgenders. To be honest I couldn't read it thoroughly. I don't even know how to heal

The main issue is that the bill would prevent trans teens under the age of 18 from getting hormonal treatment. That is the biggest slap in the face there. Getting hormone treatment during teen years can make a huuge difference.

The sports issue to me is not as important, though it may be to some, though I understand the concerns. But the rest, in terms of not being able to get treatment, is a big deal for sure.

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LeRatatouille
12 minutes ago, Sarah-Sylvia said:

The main issue is that the bill would prevent trans teens under the age of 18 from getting hormonal treatment. That is the biggest slap in the face there. Getting hormone treatment during teen years can make a huuge difference.

The sports issue to me is not as important, though it may be to some, though I understand the concerns. But the rest, in terms of not being able to get treatment, is a big deal for sure.

I meant I didn't want to read because it was hard for me to read and watch those kind of harsh things, they make me upset. But thank you explaining. People are cruel, even crueller for those "anormal" ones(!) 

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Sarah-Sylvia
5 minutes ago, LeRatatouille said:

I meant I didn't want to read because it was hard for me to read and watch those kind of harsh things, they make me upset. But thank you explaining. People are cruel, even crueller for those "anormal" ones(!) 

Ah, sorry about that. But yeah, things aren't always great, tho it's not really seen as cruel on the other side, they have their reasoning (waiting to be adult to decide), it's just they don't truly understand what's going on or important for trans people.

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Abigail Rose

I was so moved by a child telling their parent that they feel like people just do not want transgender people to do anything. It broke my heart to read that. So many states are pushing their control issues on people. Things have not improved at all. Even if the Federal government passes a law granting full rights and access to healthcare and sports, the states that are still opposed will do everything in their power to find loopholes and exploit them to the fullest. No one should have to provide proof of genitals in order to participate in sports. They aren't even willing to make an effort to be inclusive. These are just kids that need to feel some sense of normal and are being robbed of hope.

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Calligraphette_Coe
20 hours ago, Abigail Rose said:

This was really hard for me to read. I'm glad I did though. I was left asking myself, "How do we heal from this?" 

 

The Anti-Trans Bills Being Passed Throughout the US Show That the "Damage Has Been Done" (yahoo.com)

Hold close the conviction that cultural change can't be stopped. When I was their ages, what I knew for sure about myseld didn't even have a name, and that's about as bad it gets in feeling alone and lost in a world that seemed hostile at every turn.  I felt like those lyrics in a Gordon LIghtfoot song: "I walk away..... like a movie star that gets burned in a three way script...."

 

No one back then thought gay people would ever be allowed to serve without discrimination in the military, much less be able to legally marry with all the rights and privileges that go with that. Yet, eventually it happened. As will being trans in the fullness of time.

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Abigail Rose

This is another article that made me sad to read and even more sad that I have no power to stop. I don't see how hope of healing and truly feeling like we all share the same right to existence can happen if this is the best government can do. 

 

'State of crisis': Advocates warn of 'unprecedented' wave of anti-LGBTQ bills (yahoo.com)

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Zagadka

We resist it by fighting with everything in our power. That requires leaders who are willing to take bold initiatives, not leaders who refuse to abolish the filibuster because it will be unfair and make Republicans sad. Who will issue executive orders and pass national equal rights legislation. Because the Republicans will continue to utilize gerrymandering and state orders and executive orders when they can.

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I'm much disappointed with this bill. We need less government regulations, especialy when there is little at stake, like in high school. If a mtf athlete doesn't stop a afab from getting a bursary, why get involved?

 

Even in the medical treatments, they could have put more work into it to protect teenagers. There are hormone therapies with lifelong side effects that I wouldn't want a minot to have accesss too. Then, there are other hormone therapies that are completely reversible.

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Abigail Rose

@Howard The standard that doctors have set for minors does not have permanent results. Puberty blockers are just a pause button for puberty. That alone has given children and their families time to adjust and be certain of their situations. Minors get puberty blockers and therapy for many reasons. They do not generally give minors the actual hormones until they are adults. That is true of cis minors and trans ones. Also, something important to consider, the few possible side effects that can happen are far less permanent than a child being denied their identity and then committing suicide. That's permanent.

 

The whole point of this thread is to seek out ways to cope with knowing all of this hate exists and no laws will stop it. I am disgusted with humanity and it's self righteous entitlement to pass judgement on lives they can not understand. They push false scientific information in an attempt to make the parents and doctors look like bad people, so much that they are literally passing laws making it a crime to get care for their children. 

 

This isn't just a trans issue really. It's a human one. 

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Kroete

I am now 100% convinced the GOP is literally a national threat.
I think it is incredibly important to remove the GOP from all power everywhere. The GOP has shown in the last 4 years that it was comfortable with moving FAR to the right. I wouldn't be surprised if the next GOP president would be way more open about far right neonazi positions than Donald Trump.
The ex-president Donald Trump had no problem with neonazi groups, the GOP pushed wild propaganda about how the election was "stolen", the GOP is constantly and systematically directly attacking the US democracy everywhere and abuse every dirty trick to stay in power. The GOP opposes anything that would boost democracy because they would lose power then. The GOP loves to trample on minorities because it's easy and distracts from their own abuses. The GOP hates the environment and loves polluters because of $$$. This also makes the GOP a global threat since they love to pollute the planet and directly contribute to the upcoming climate catastrophe.

The GOP is moving closer and closer to outright fascism yet the Democrats believes in "compromise". But we all know you can never compromise with fascists.

This also means the Democrats need to be pressured HARD. The Democrats are still playing WAY too nice with the GOP but this must stop.
I think the top priority should be to repair the broken US democracy because currently the deck is massively stacked towards the GOP.
The Democrats have all 3 federal branches of government, which means NOW is the ultimate chance to act. But the clock is ticking ... If the Democrats are smart, they would do everything they can to restore democracy:

- Ban voting machines
- Washington D.C. statehood
- Turn the territories into proper states
- Ban gerrymandering
- Ban the filibuster
- And so much more ...

So far, the Democrats have been a huge disappointment, nothing that would really boost democracy has happened so far.

Do I think with the Democrats everything will be rainbow and uncorns? Hell no! I think the Democrats are strongly controlled by corporate power and neoliberal ideology and have no real plan to fight poverty, but at least they aren't comfortable with fascism or hate trans people. I think both GOP and Dems are awful parties, but the GOP is clearly worse and a national threat.

I don't even live in the US, but I have been following what is happening over there and it terrifies me. Defeating the GOP everywhere and restoring democracy should be your top priorities.
Also, media. US media is polluted with far right agitators and this has been tolerated for decades. For example, have Tucker Carlson who constantly spews white nationalist propaganda and also loves to hate on minorities. These people have HUGE audiences who fall for this shit. The shocking part to me is that he isn't some fringe figure but he is part of the mainstream. And he is not the only one. The USA really has normalized white nationalism that it's not funny anymore.
In my country, this stuff would be UNTHINKABLE.
(YouTube is another thing, not purely US-specific. When it comes to political commentary, there are many popular "conservative" agitators that sadly seem to dominate discourse but not enough leftwing voices. I admit I was sucked into this "trans people are just crazy" narrative for years when eventually I realized it was all bullshit when I finally decided to look up FACTS. It seems it is way easier to randomly stumble upon a rightwing commentator than a leftwing one.)

These are all signs of fascism in my eyes, and it needs to be attacked much more openly on all fronts. Otherwise this will just get worse and worse. Today they attack trans people, I wonder which minority will be next. I think the attack on trans people is just a part of a broader movement towards authotarianism. And right now, the resistance against this movement still appears to be too weak.

I am not saying the USA is fascist right now, but there are huge warning signs. Terrifying.

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Abigail Rose
4 hours ago, Kroete said:

I admit I was sucked into this "trans people are just crazy" narrative for years

The trans community, like many others, has been trying to survive multiple storms all at once. So many issues within and without ourselves. We've all been hoodwinked into believing it's not ok to just be ourselves because someone else says it. For me, most days are like, I'm trying to not feel bad, for just trying to live a life that I feel good about, while knowing there are people who will never even meet me personally but, are determined to make sure I will never be able to just love life for me. I'm honestly more worried for their mental health than my own and I absolutely fear them for what they do. I also feel bad for being the trigger for their aggressions but, they are the ones that are holding the guns, metaphorically or otherwise, unfortunately. It's sad how much time some people will spend creating boundaries for others or making rules that specifically target them as though they were property to be managed or handled as though they were livestock. Imagine how much more personal time they would have to discover better things within themselves, if only they would stop giving so much time to controlling everything outside themselves. 

 

If this doesn't prove, to anyone that gives this some thought, that the entire human species is flawed, beautiful and most certainly crazy, then I don't know what could.

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A User

America is just one big pain in the butt and I wish that all the peeps living there who are affected by this can get better. For a country that's very developed, why haven't they developed basic human rights? I'm pretty sure nowhere in the constitution does it say "the government has every right to exclude people based on what they identify as".

 

That's just shit. I hate reading all the articles about I wish they could stop spreading hate and negativity where it's absolutely not needed. Like literally isn't biden supposed to support lgtbq people and now their just making this worse like wtf???

 

 

 

Being an "ally" starts with making exclusionary laws, am i right?

/s

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Zagadka

"Developed" does not mean "progressive." The United States is pretty far behind most of the other wealthy nations in a lot of areas of human rights, social welfare, healthcare, etc. We never ratified a lot of human rights treaties, refuse international oversight in the ICC etc, and have a very conservative society.

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daveb

In the US we also have a certain amount of autonomy at the state level, and there are limits on what the federal level can do. Most of the horrible bills are coming up in Republican controlled state legislatures, generally in conservative states. Biden and the Federal government (Senate and House) can do some things and they are. Whether it's enough is up for debate. One thing Biden and the Democrats at the federal level want to do is pass the Equality act, for example. Executive orders can also do some things, but they can easily be dropped, too, especially if another person becomes president, so they're really mainly stopgap measures.

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Abigail Rose

I don't look at the need to pass a law, making people acknowledge everyone's right to exist as a good thing in any way. Does it feel any better that we have to force them to allow all people access to even the simplest of things like the healthcare they need or want, school or work without discrimination, just to feel like part of a team playing ball with other kids? This shouldn't even be a lesson we need as a society that seems pride itself on how much it can achieve.

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Calligraphette_Coe

Is anyone else a little disturbed that Caitlyn Jenner is probably going to run for Governor in California and is taking the Republican stance on passing these sorts of laws? I guess I don't have a dog in this hunt as I have never and will never compete in organized sports activities, but I DO see this stance as being a dog whistle and political expediency that is not going to champion the cause.

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Abigail Rose
8 hours ago, Calligraphette_Coe said:

Is anyone else a little disturbed that Caitlyn Jenner is probably going to run for Governor in California and is taking the Republican stance on passing these sorts of laws?

Disturbed is a polite way of putting that. What concerns me most is how flagrant she and many people are with the words they express publicly and the complete lack of empathy being shown. This can't be described as unexpected by any means. Her intentions are exhibitionist at best and selfish. How dare an Olympian deny anyone a right to participate in sports. It literally defies the definition and the integrity of the traits an Olympian should have. There is no place, on Earth, where governance can turn prosperous results, so long as it would burn it's bridges rather than build them.

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Zagadka
8 hours ago, Calligraphette_Coe said:

Is anyone else a little disturbed that Caitlyn Jenner is probably going to run for Governor in California and is taking the Republican stance on passing these sorts of laws? I guess I don't have a dog in this hunt as I have never and will never compete in organized sports activities, but I DO see this stance as being a dog whistle and political expediency that is not going to champion the cause.

Well, she literally is a Republican and has always held those positions. What do you expect? Just because she's trans she'd do better?

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Calligraphette_Coe
3 hours ago, Abigail Rose said:

Disturbed is a polite way of putting that. What concerns me most is how flagrant she and many people are with the words they express publicly and the complete lack of empathy being shown. This can't be described as unexpected by any means. Her intentions are exhibitionist at best and selfish. How dare an Olympian deny anyone a right to participate in sports. It literally defies the definition and the integrity of the traits an Olympian should have. There is no place, on Earth, where governance can turn prosperous results, so long as it would burn it's bridges rather than build them.

When if first read she was going thru with this, Alanis Morisette's "Isn't it Ironic" was playing in my head. And maybe Cyndi Lauper's "Money Changes Everything". It's the old "I Got Mine" meme writ large. It's pretty certain that today's transwomen aren't going to end up on a box of "Wheaties ( Breakfast of Champions)" cereal boxes, but maybe that's just me being catty. But after all the dilemmas with which I had to cope with being trans, I guess I've come to expect being thrown under the bus and I don't see how anything she's going to do would make my life any easier.

 

 

3 hours ago, Zagadka said:

Well, she literally is a Republican and has always held those positions. What do you expect? Just because she's trans she'd do better?

Maybe. I doubt she'd give me the time of day, with my being perenially "Pre". And I guess Log Cabin Republicanism is an enduring meme.

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Abigail Rose
16 hours ago, Calligraphette_Coe said:

But after all the dilemmas with which I had to cope with being trans, I guess I've come to expect being thrown under the bus and I don't see how anything she's going to do would make my life any easier.

I know your pain and share it similarly. That is one of the purposes for this thread. How we look past the history of mistreatment while it is still happening in the present is so difficult. I avoid in person meetings with as many people as possible just to make things easier for everyone. It sucks. It's lonely. I don't want to be the cause of anyone's pain. I simply want basic human rights for everyone. Guess it's not that simple but, it should be. Don't count out the trans athlete's of the future. There very likely will be a moment when that does happen and though it will be controversial, it will be historic for all of us. 

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Abigail Rose

Some doctors, in the states where laws against medical treatment for transgender health have been proposed or passed, have started pushing back. The more the healthcare community pushes the states to acknowledge everyone's right to pursue their best health, whatever that may be, the better. I thought this was nice to read, even though it really shouldn't ever have been necessary to write.

 

Doctors fear next steps if states ban care for trans youth (yahoo.com)

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