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Panromantic or omniromantic??


weirdlyhuman

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weirdlyhuman

I recently found out what omnisexual means (when you're attracted sexually to all genders, but notice the gender unlike pansexual and may have a preference) and then I realized I was asexual, so it turned into omniromantic. But now I'm feeling bad about caring whether the people I'm attracted to is whatever gender and want to change it to panromantic...i don't really know. If anyone has any experience or answers please reply because I'm curious. Thanks for reading 

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Most pansexual/-romantic people I know notice gender. It is just that gender is not an important factor whom they are attracted to. However they may have a preference for more feminine/masculine/andrgynous people. Also I know a lot of people who use both pan and bi for themselves, and all bi people I know don't exclude non-binary people from their attraction regardless if they use pan for themself. I don't know anyone using omni for themself. But these labels have a huge overlap so there is no point in trying to find a precise border between them.

 

If you like omni better use it, if you like pan better use it or use both.

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everywhere and nowhere
18 minutes ago, Eli Potter-Weasley said:

But now I'm feeling bad about caring whether the people I'm attracted to is whatever gender and want to change it to panromantic...i don't really know.

There's nothing wrong about having a preference for gender. If you feel potential romantic attraction to people of all genders, you can identify as panromantic, or omniromantic, whatever feels better for you. But I wanted to respond because I certainly sometimes notice this kind of attitude: some people are, OK, able to recognise that someone may be asexual - but then they start saying things like that: "But why care about gender if you don't want to have sex with your potential partner anyway? Isn't it shallow and superficial to care about gender and not exclusively personality?". They are able to recognise that people who desire sex may feel comfortable about sex with a person of a particular body type, but not another, but their understanding of gender stops at this level, they don't notice other aspects. And yet aces may have a gender preference too and there's nothing wrong with it. I, for example, feel that I couldn't be with someone male-presenting because the thought of being perceived as heterosexual feels very uncomfortable to me.

You can identify however you want to, you can change it according to whatever feels comfortable to you, or even according to an esthetic preference for the sound of a particular word. (I use the prefixes pan- and omni- in two neologisms, although in the Polish version they anyway use the same native prefix rather than two different Latin ones. But when translating it to Latin-English, each just sounded better for a particular word: panpolitical - a kind of euphoric feeling of everything as political, as interconnected on a political level; and omnisensation - the hypothetic state of "experiencing everything". These words are important for my philosophy and "phenomenology of experience", so I use both in my diary.) But never change it because something is supposedly "right" or "wrong". There's nothing wrong with caring about gender and there's nothing wrong with not caring about gender (as long as you don't erase those who feel otherwise), and there's also nothing wrong with having a gender preference.

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The most beneficial thing would probably be to just drop the "label" and live your life. Whoever you're attracted to in whichever way is whoever you're attracted to in whichever way, regardless of what "label" you slap on it :)

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Aelin Galathynius

I'm panromantic, and do have a preference for gender, but it's like my preference for hair colour; not important in a relationship. I just use pan because it fits me better. I know that labels can make you feel better, but words like queer or even just not straight work just as well if you don't want to put a label on just yet. 

Oh, and welcome to aven!🍰 

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VeryAsexyIndeed

Use the label you feel the most comfortable using. Pan, bi and omni are pretty similar and it’s your sexuality after all, you know what feels the best for you. You don’t even need a label if you don’t want one, that’s all up to you. I for example feel more comfortable calling myself lesbian than bi, even tho I like both women and enbys, and so I call myself lesbian or neptunic instead. That’s just what I prefer. You choose what you like best🌈💖🌈🐝

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You are what you are, and you like what you like, regardless of what label you put on it. The purpose of a label is to give people a clear idea of what you are, without your having to give them an entire essay about your feelings and preferences. If you refuse to use a label, people think that you're embarrassed or ashamed about who you are, and that's why you're refusing to say it; they assume that if even YOU think there's something wrong with who you are, then THEY should certainly think there's something wrong with you as well. That's never good.

 

If you use an inaccurate label because you think it's superior in some way, you'll be giving people the wrong idea about who you really are… but on the other hand, 99% of the people in the world have never heard of ANY of these labels, and those of us who HAVE heard about them can't agree on what they mean, LOL!

 

The simple solution to this might be to call yourself POLYromantic, to indicate that you're interested in a variety of different genders but maybe not  ALL genders… And frankly, that's more accurate for the vast majority of people in this universe of attraction, because really, how many of us have met people of EVERY gender, to judge whether or not we'd be romantically attracted to EVERY gender? Have you met every kind of trans person? Every kind of intersexed person? Every kind of non-binary person? *I* sure haven't, which is why I changed MY "attraction label" from pan to poly. Some people are really sure that they WOULD feel a romantic attraction regardless of primary and secondary sex characteristics, and I say more power to them, and they should definitely keep using pan or omni, whichever they prefer; for you, I think poly is worth at least thinking about. 

 

In the meantime, stop beating yourself up because you don't feel perfect and equal attraction for every single aspect of every single kind of person! Whatever your natural feelings are, they are 100% acceptable, and just as good and valid as everyone else's!

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Bi, pan and omni are so similar that most people don't really care if you use them interchangeably. I'm not genderblind and I use panromantic instead of omniromantic because it makes the pancake pun. (ace= 🍰 obviously)

No label will ever perfectly describe anything, but it can be close enough. 

 

There's nothing wrong with being more attracted to a certain gender than another btw. First of all, it's not a choice, and second of all, if it was, it's your life, you decide who you spend time with.

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