Jump to content

Cassgender


Personyperson

Recommended Posts

Personyperson

Okay, so I am figuring out my identity and stuff, and along the way I found the term cassgender. It's a gender identity where one feels that their gender is unimportant or where one is indifferent to the idea of gender. I relate to this. I have never really cared that much about my gender. I do identify as female, but if someone was like "Oh, he's over there" pointing at me, I wouldn't correct them. Because, to me, my gender is something entirely separate from who I am. So I'm over here, and my gender is over in the corner playing solitaire. Also, as well as identifying as female, I have a female body. I don't feel the need to change my body in any way. I'm comfortable in it. BUT. I don't consider the fact that my body is female to be important. My body is simply the fleshy structure that allows me to move from place to place. I have all the female sex organs and stuff, but this doesn't define me. I don't find it important. However, I have found that some people think cassgender to be snowflakey. I am not trying to be special. But I do want to know who I am. I want to identify with something so I can better understand myself as a human being. I'm not trying to say "I'm oppressed so I need to be different and special" I live in a reasonably healthy household with kind and supportive parents. I have pretty nice siblings, reasonably well set up social group, I am much better off than many people. But I do want to identify with a group, not a gender, but with other people. I would love to hear other peoples opinions of this. Thank you! 

 

Link to post
Share on other sites

I think most people don't care about their gender unless it is off in some way.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Janus the Fox

Same for my Gender but I do recognise a need for a change in Sex.  Hence being Agender and MtF Female.

Link to post
Share on other sites
3 hours ago, Personyperson said:

It's a gender identity where one feels that their gender is unimportant or where one is indifferent to the idea of gender.

Honestly, this sounds... pretty common? I think there are a lot of self-identifying cis folks who feel the same way, and I'd include myself as one.

Link to post
Share on other sites
56 minutes ago, SocialMorays said:

Honestly, this sounds... pretty common? I think there are a lot of self-identifying cis folks who feel the same way, and I'd include myself as one.

It seems like it might be one of those labels that can stack with others, like demi-[insert label here].

Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, SocialMorays said:

Honestly, this sounds... pretty common? I think there are a lot of self-identifying cis folks who feel the same way, and I'd include myself as one.

I've heard the same said about demi- and grey-sexual. They all probably apply to a lot of people who generally don't care and wouldn't identify as anything normally.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I guess my question to OP would be -- what is the purpose of the label for you? If the purpose is to communicate to other people "I'm indifferent to my gender," saying that plainly in those words is the clearest way to do so. The vast majority of people have never heard the term "cassgender," and even I, who have seen my fair share of gendered microlabels on AVEN, would've had to look it up.

 

However, if the purpose is how it makes you feel, then obviously only you can make a decision about that. You do say, "I do want to identify with a group, not a gender, but with other people." Is a label necessary for that? That's a genuine question, and one I can't answer for you. Just food for thought.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Anthracite_Impreza

Sounds to me like someone who's cis. I mean, that is literally what cis means, having no disconnect between assigned gender and self.

Link to post
Share on other sites
5 hours ago, Personyperson said:

Okay, so I am figuring out my identity and stuff, and along the way I found the term cassgender. It's a gender identity where one feels that their gender is unimportant or where one is indifferent to the idea of gender. I relate to this. I have never really cared that much about my gender. I do identify as female, but if someone was like "Oh, he's over there" pointing at me, I wouldn't correct them. Because, to me, my gender is something entirely separate from who I am. So I'm over here, and my gender is over in the corner playing solitaire. Also, as well as identifying as female, I have a female body. I don't feel the need to change my body in any way. I'm comfortable in it. BUT. I don't consider the fact that my body is female to be important. My body is simply the fleshy structure that allows me to move from place to place. I have all the female sex organs and stuff, but this doesn't define me. I don't find it important. However, I have found that some people think cassgender to be snowflakey. I am not trying to be special. But I do want to know who I am. I want to identify with something so I can better understand myself as a human being. I'm not trying to say "I'm oppressed so I need to be different and special" I live in a reasonably healthy household with kind and supportive parents. I have pretty nice siblings, reasonably well set up social group, I am much better off than many people. But I do want to identify with a group, not a gender, but with other people. I would love to hear other peoples opinions of this. Thank you! 

 

You sound a little bit like me, to be honest. Do you summarize the connection between your gender and sex to be akin to "I have a insert type of genitalia here, so what?"? That's pretty much how I feel about all the parts of me being male, except for the gender stereotypes and role expectations, It's those parts that I generally hate being considered "male/masculine" in regards to. 

Link to post
Share on other sites
Personyperson
16 hours ago, SocialMorays said:

I guess my question to OP would be -- what is the purpose of the label for you? If the purpose is to communicate to other people "I'm indifferent to my gender," saying that plainly in those words is the clearest way to do so. The vast majority of people have never heard the term "cassgender," and even I, who have seen my fair share of gendered microlabels on AVEN, would've had to look it up.

 

However, if the purpose is how it makes you feel, then obviously only you can make a decision about that. You do say, "I do want to identify with a group, not a gender, but with other people." Is a label necessary for that? That's a genuine question, and one I can't answer for you. Just food for thought.

You have a very good point. And, after thinking through it, no I don't need an obscure label. It's only ever going to be confusing, and I'll just have to explain what cassgender means and why it applies to me over and over.It, in retrospect, doesn't make sense. I'm just trying to figure this all out, and I appreciate the feedback. Thank you. 

Link to post
Share on other sites
Personyperson

So, I forgot to mention something. The only reason I identify as female is because it's easier for everyone else. If I went up to my parents and said "Hey, I'm changing my name to Alfred and am going to use he/him pronouns now" they'd be like "okay, but why Alfred? Surely you could find a better name than Alfred."  Or If I went "I am going to use they/them pronouns now" They'd do their best to use the right pronouns. But if I keep using she/her pronouns then it's just easier for everyone. I don't think my gender defines who I am, so it doesn't matter to me either way, and my parents (and everyone else I know) don't have to retrain their brains so they connect me with different pronouns. Just wanted to throw this out there.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I should have read this post before starting a separate tirade on gender pronouns.

 

I feel similarly to you @Personyperson. I am willing to accept the default because I'd rather not have people give it a second thought, even though "she/her" just feels kind of weird.

 

Link to post
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...