myra Posted January 7, 2007 Share Posted January 7, 2007 Do any of you have long term friendships? People you got to know in your teens or twenties whom you can still call best friends. I'm still in my twenties, but have friends I know for about 10 and 15 years. I hope that I can still call them friends when I'm 60. It seems that close friendships are a real good alternative for an asexual. :) Link to post Share on other sites
cijay Posted January 7, 2007 Share Posted January 7, 2007 My best friend and I met when I was 8 and she was 11, I'm now 44. Our friendship is so special that we can go for a year or so without even seeing each other and then just picking up where we left off when we do see each other. She remained unmarried and never chased guys either, she could be asexual, don't care if she is or not, just glad she's mine. Link to post Share on other sites
myra Posted January 7, 2007 Author Share Posted January 7, 2007 it's very nice to hear that, cijay! :) Link to post Share on other sites
vikingo Posted January 7, 2007 Share Posted January 7, 2007 I have a couple of friends - they are actually a couple - with whom I have been friends for 26 years. We are quite unalike individuals and yet through all these years every time we have been together has been awarding to all. Link to post Share on other sites
Ziffler Posted January 7, 2007 Share Posted January 7, 2007 I am a Military Brat. Moved around alot. 5 different homes before I started school. 4 different elementary schools. 2 different junior high schools and 1 high school. So during the first 17 years of my life I moved 12 times. Not likely to form childhood friendships. I guess I got that rambling spirit or learned it or whatever, because after school I kept moving around. Never building any kind of long term friendships just casual aquaintences. So, Nope, I have NO friendships that I consider more than an aquaintence and none of those are long term. Link to post Share on other sites
Busrider Posted January 8, 2007 Share Posted January 8, 2007 My longest friendship is lasting 23 years now. (I'm not that old) From watching my parents I doubt grown ups write others off as quickly as during school days. Link to post Share on other sites
mackat5 Posted January 8, 2007 Share Posted January 8, 2007 My Dad was a watch repairman, and if he wanted a better paying job, we had to move, often to another state. Six years in Ohio, 2 years in IL, 4 years in the thumb of MI, so I have not had not had any chances to make life-slong friends. I have lived here since '64, so I now have many friends that I've had for a long time. but not life-long. Link to post Share on other sites
KAGU143 Posted January 8, 2007 Share Posted January 8, 2007 No life-long friends for me, either. My dad worked as a chemical engineer for several different companies, including (the last one) Halliburton. Union Carbide was the worst when it came to transfering him all over the place. I left home as soon as I could, right after high school, so I managed to keep a few of my highschool friends. Everybody that I knew prior to then is lost to me, though. I have known some of my high school friends for about 37 years, but the longest lasting friend that I still hear from regularly came into my life a few years later. I think it's been about ... 34 years?? Close to that, anyway. He pops into AVEN occasionally as Beelzebuddy. -GB Link to post Share on other sites
2tabbymom Posted January 8, 2007 Share Posted January 8, 2007 I met my best friend in college, we were in the same organic chemistry class. I was 21 and he was 19. Next month will be 25 years. It was a fluke, because he only went to my university for one semester. I was also a military brat, so I don't have any friends from my elementary/high school days. It was a lot harder to keep in touch back then-only by letter writing, no email or cell phones for long distance calls. Link to post Share on other sites
myra Posted January 8, 2007 Author Share Posted January 8, 2007 So, Nope, I have NO friendships that I consider more than an aquaintence and none of those are long term. Are you fine with that, Ziffler, or do you sometimes long to have more that an acqaintence? I suppose it might be nice not longing for friendship and feeling happy with some contacts now and then. Just living happily on your own. :) Link to post Share on other sites
ForestRangerFX4 Posted January 8, 2007 Share Posted January 8, 2007 If your talking about school friends you keep in touch with cards and emails, Yes. But if your talking about friends that you go shopping with, go out for dinner or movies, tell them what kind of day you had, or just to hang out, No. Wish I did. Link to post Share on other sites
Tanwen Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 My pen friend and I have been writing since we were 12 (45 years now). She came over to the UK in 1993 and I was a bit worried whether we'd actually get on...but she was just like her letters, so we had a great time. *Does this count?* Link to post Share on other sites
Parth Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 Our friendship is so special that we can go for a year or so without even seeing each other and then just picking up where we left off when we do see each other. That's what I'm like with my best friend. But sometimes I really miss her. I mean, we live in the same suburb, but I haven't actually seen her for 19 months (we are never free at the same time). We communicate online though. Link to post Share on other sites
Ziffler Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 myra wrote:Are you fine with that, Ziffler, or do you sometimes long to have more that an acqaintence? I suppose it might be nice not longing for friendship and feeling happy with some contacts now and then. Just living happily on your own. When I was a boy, I longed for closeness with anyone, especially a male. My dad was always gone and when he was home he was very strict/cruel. I can remember praying and crying at night for God to send someone into my life who would love me, even if that person was a child molestor. Now, as a boy I had no idea what sex was or what a child molestor did, so I was extremely niave in that prayer and Thank My God He never granted that prayer. But I was that lonely and that needy for a close friendship. But now. I am more than comfortable being completely alone. Matter of fact. I can't stand anyone getting too close. I don't like anyone visiting my home. It's my personal space and sanctuary. I never open up to anyone in real life. Online is the only place I am truely open about myself and that is only because I am anonymous and because if anyone trys to get to close I can disappear. So yes. I am very happy being alone. Not having any close friendships or relationships. Link to post Share on other sites
Parvana Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 My best friend and I go back before we were born. My mother met her mother back when the two of the were pregnant with me and my friend. She was born a few months before me, but we hit it off good in the playpen. Sadly, we moved apart due to the fact that both of our fathers were in the military. During our childhood, we would meet up every few years and spend time together. She had a picture of her and me hugging framed in her room and I had one of her and I sharing a book set on my vanity. One point in our life, the two of us only lived about five hours apart from one another. We spent a lot of time together during that period. Soon, I moved again and so did she. We stayed in contact with instant messaging. We rarely talk to each other nowadays, but our mothers keep in contact with one another. I consider her my best friend to this day and I still hope that she does as well. Link to post Share on other sites
bug Posted January 20, 2007 Share Posted January 20, 2007 Today visited my oldest friend in all respects. She is 81. Her father was my father's best friend, and because I had such old parents. she is a generation older than me, but she has known me all my life which is nearly 50 years now!!! Just recently got dumped by my friend of 13 years and I find that still unbelievable. Something very wrong with her at the moment but she is not able to share it and just wants me to "go away". Link to post Share on other sites
Tanwen Posted January 21, 2007 Share Posted January 21, 2007 Bug sorry your friend decided to leave. I don't know how you'd feel if she wanted to come back, it's something I've never had to deal with. It must be even more difficult because they didn't give a reason. *Guess the nearest I came to it was when my ex-husband visited and announced his current partner had stated he was only visiting to sleep with me. He said that as he was being accused of it, he might as well do it! My reply is not printable on this board.* Link to post Share on other sites
roddy9uk Posted January 21, 2007 Share Posted January 21, 2007 I wish I could find/recall accurately that quote about..some people pass by you..some stop for a while and some stop with you forever.. When I read threads like this I am never quite sure what "life long friendship" actually means.. Personally I tend to savour friendship on the basis that it might be a passing one..but if you do not savour it then it certainly will be! roddy Link to post Share on other sites
sakura_alice Posted January 21, 2007 Share Posted January 21, 2007 I have a best friend, and though we haven't seen each other in a few years, and have only talked on the phone twice (she moved to Hawaii), I still feel a bond with her. We are very much alike, and we've influenced each other to do great things. We can talk about anything. She's the only one I can do that with actually, and now that she's gone, I've held most all of my thoughts and feelings inside, because I don't trust anyone like I trust her. We've known each other since we were six years old (met in kindergarten), and now being 21 I still love and miss her. I have yet to meet anyone that came even close to being as open-minded, kind, creative, happy-go-lucky, brave, strong, and sweet as her, she's definately my treasure, but now I feel like she's gone, and everytime I think about her my heart hurts with the memories I have of us and everything we've been through together. And now it sounds like I wrote something sappy, lol, but it's the truth =( Link to post Share on other sites
Rin Posted January 22, 2007 Share Posted January 22, 2007 sakura_alice, thats a shame. Can't you communicate over the net through MSN Messenger or similar? Might be a little more convenient than the phone as you can both just pop on whenever you have free time or are browsing the net. Hope you stay in touch, Hawaii would be a nice place to drop by for a visit though. :D Link to post Share on other sites
Jst1Dreamr Posted January 23, 2007 Share Posted January 23, 2007 Myra, I can tell you that long term best friends is possible. I have had one person who is my very best friend since 1974. We have shared every kind of relationship with each other and never faultered in our friendship. We have even been working together every day for 8 years now and we hang out together. Her boyfriend has been a good friend of mine for the last 7 years also. A true best friend is for life. Link to post Share on other sites
Zerick Posted January 23, 2007 Share Posted January 23, 2007 I am still good friends with a friend who I have had since birth. Well not exactly birth since he is 8 months younger. Our parents are friends and have been since before I was born. I live with another friend who I meet when I was 18. Link to post Share on other sites
myra Posted January 24, 2007 Author Share Posted January 24, 2007 A true best friend is for life. That's the way it should be. ;) I hope to keep my friends a lifetime. Link to post Share on other sites
LostPenguin Posted January 24, 2007 Share Posted January 24, 2007 My closest friend... how long have we been at it now... -thinks- 8 going on 9 years. Not as long as some people, but I'm rather proud of it, especially since we've spent 6 of those years as a long-distance friendship. I love her dearly even though we're almost complete opposites and she's sometimes said demented things (apparently meaning them wholeheartedly) about wanting to 'grow old' with me... heheh! (She's quiiiite straight and I'm not interested in her romantically, so it was just meant in an incredibly close friendship type way.) -sniff- I miss her. Link to post Share on other sites
bug Posted February 2, 2007 Share Posted February 2, 2007 Thanks Tanwen. I miss my friend in lots of ways but I know she was unhappy, though probably not really with me, though she made out she left because of things I'd done (getting too close mainly). I thought we would be friends forever, as it was 13 years and we had only been on holiday together a few months before. She did try to explain why she left, but it was all mixed up and crazy and makes me think she is having a breakdown and doesn't know what she wants. I would take her back any time - but she'd have to call me first. I am scared to ring in case I get more nasty things said. Sigh... Link to post Share on other sites
Yuri_Hara Posted February 12, 2007 Share Posted February 12, 2007 Although I too have moved around a lot s my dad's company transfers him around. 4 different places before elementary school, 3 different elementary schools and 2 different high schools..... I have kept in contact with my friends. My longest friend so far I've known almost all my life. (I'm 18) First met when I was slightly over 1 year and she was 7 months old. My other verrrrry close friends since toddler and so on. Only a hand full we've lost contact. THanks to technology!! :) Link to post Share on other sites
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