jaybird721 Posted January 5, 2007 Share Posted January 5, 2007 Despite the red flag or two in the letter, the response is excellent.http://news.yahoo.com/b/dear_margo/margo_howard200612292014 Mod Edit: The above link doesn't work anymore, but the content can be found here. For future reference: Peer Pressure 10; Sex Drive 0Fri Dec 29, 3:00 AM ET DEAR MARGO: I am a 13-year-old girl in eighth grade, and I have started identifying myself as asexual. I'm not interested in sex, dating or kissing. (The sad part is, I'm a hopeless romantic.) Part of it is because of my religion.I believe the only lifelong commitment I should have is to my Lord. I know this might change in time, but here's the problem. I get into truth-or-dare games with kids my age, have discussions at lunch, overhear conversations, and all of them are about the same thing: boys.The conversations make me feel uncomfortable because I don't know anything about it. But when people ask me, "Have you ever been kissed?" or "Do you have a crush?" it becomes awkward and I want to run and hide.In our society that is so sex-oriented and promotes the dream of a family with 3.7 kids and a picket fence, it feels like there's no place for someone who doesn't fall in love.How do you explain to people your age who are obsessed with dating and boyfriends and girlfriends that you don't want to be a part of that, or at least not soon? --- AMOEBADEAR AM: Unless you are a Catholic nun, to the best of my knowledge no religion requires you to give up a romantic partner in order to honor the Lord. You might want to talk to your pastor about this.My hunch, though, is that at this point in your life, you may well be asexual. As for what to do about friends' questions, you only have two options. One is to have the courage of your convictions and say what you feel, which, admittedly, will single you out as "different," and the other would be to say you'd prefer to keep your thoughts on the subject to yourself for the time being.Your instincts may change, and they may not. As for your larger question, the group of people who do not fall in love is not as small as you imagine. --- MARGO, SUPPORTIVELY Link to post Share on other sites
Brodertun Posted January 5, 2007 Share Posted January 5, 2007 wow I didn't think any one would give that response to a 13 year old. Heck I probably wouldn't even though my one professor made a point about how gay kids can know their gay at 12 by asking "How old were you when you had your first crush?" *and when did we go from 2.5 to 3.7 kids? I missed that. Link to post Share on other sites
Brodertun Posted January 5, 2007 Share Posted January 5, 2007 and i clicke don one of the older links and found a brief reference to asexuals there too http://news.yahoo.com/b/dear_margo/margo_howard20070104basically it just says "assume he's gay or asexual" but its still giving validity to us2014 Mod Edit: The above link doesn't work anymore, but the content can be found here. For future reference: TO ASK OR NOT TO ASK?DEAR MARGO: My close friends and I know everything about one another. We share intimate details and embarrassing moments, as friends do.However, one of our friends, a man in his early 20s, leaves part of his life a mystery. We don't hear about his love life, or even exes (he had one or two girlfriends in high school, but hasn't dated since). When romance is brought up, the subject is changed.He is flirtatious with both men and women, and we are all going crazy wondering -- IS HE GAY OR WHAT? We all want to ask but know that he will freak out if we aren't tactful. How do we go about facilitating that kind of conversation without overstepping boundaries?--- NO NAME HERE, PLEASEDEAR NO: I do not think there is a tactful way to ask someone who never discusses his love life, but listens to all of you discuss yours, if he's gay. Since you seem to know for a fact that he has not dated since high school and flirts with both sexes, it's a fair bet that either nothing is going on, or he doesn't wish for you to know exactly what is going on.To quiet your curiosity, assume he's either gay or asexual, and stop obsessing about something he chooses to keep to himself. And it is possible that maybe he hasn't made up his mind.--- MARGO, UNCONCERNEDLY Link to post Share on other sites
jaybird721 Posted January 5, 2007 Author Share Posted January 5, 2007 Yeah, I don't know who Margo is, but she's definitely helping validate asexuality. Oh, and I should mention that I got the link from the livejounal community too; I didn't find it originally. Link to post Share on other sites
! Posted January 7, 2007 Share Posted January 7, 2007 CAKE FOR MARGO!!! :cake: :vis: Link to post Share on other sites
mindlife Posted January 7, 2007 Share Posted January 7, 2007 I agree. Cake and recognition. She's cool. Link to post Share on other sites
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