Asexual or Greysexual? Also biromantic?

[Idkyou]

I’ve recently been thinking I’m asexual because I don’t want anything to do with anything entering my body or touching of my genitalia at all. I feel sexual attraction but not really desire. Like I get horny and I masterbate but I don’t actually want it to happen. not sex itself. 

 

And I think I might be bi-romantic but I don’t think I what to identify as that because if I come out people are just gonna ask questions like ‘what is that?’ And I don’t want to explain it to everyone. Is that like rude to not want to identify as what I think I am because it would be easier for me? 

[mozart]

46 minutes ago, Idkyou said:

Is that like rude to not want to identify as what I think I am because it would be easier for me? 

You can identify with a label and just not tell anyone. And who do you think would be offended if you didn't identify as something? Or did you maybe mean come out instead of identifying?

[Cesyl]

I can relate a lot. I'm also still questioning my sexuality, though I'm sure I am biromantic. I've had crushes on both men and women and imagined our lives together.

I also get horny and masterbate, but unlike you, I would like to experience sex. Like me you're probably on the ace-spectrum, though it sounds like you might be sex-averse. (please de the research yourself too). You say you feel sexual attraction, so I wouldn't classify you as asexual, maybe demi- or gray-sexaul? 

I hope this was at least a little helpful..?

 

[Janus the Fox]

Moved to The Grey Area, Sex and Related Discussions

 

Janus DarkFox

Cover Welcome Lounge, Weekends Asexual Relationships, Current Questions about Asexuality, Asexual Musings and Rantings & Open Mic Moderator

[ubersnail]

Hello! I'm kinda new here myself but it sounds like you have 'no desire for partnered sex'? On the other hand not everyone likes the same kind of sex(ual activities); I guess it depends why you think you would enjoy more "sensual" stuff. As you've probably read sensual and sexual attraction are different; you can enjoy close physical contact without feeling sexual about it.

 

Have you looked into aegosexuality? I know, it's a type of asexuality by definition, I'm calling myself aegosexual anyway because I do feel sexual attraction, or at least something very close depending on your definition, but no desire for partnered sex. It's not clear if you do find yourself sexually attracted to certain people though? Feeling horny, masturbating, ect. doesn't affect who you're attracted to.

 

1 hour ago, Idkyou said:

Is that like rude to not want to identify as what I think I am because it would be easier for me? 

imo, no! As "labels" are associated with socially progressive movements, I think people lose sight of the fact that being able to label yourself, and have other people somewhat acknowledge it, is a huge privilege in and of itself. Being in the position to choose between two labels is a freedom, and as long as you're not completely misrepresenting yourself (or at least not to potential partners) I don't see why we shouldn't use it. It's also legitimate to find value in knowing your feelings are real and there are words for them even if you don't come out/always use the labels. (Also some people call themselves straight ace, bi ace, ect. though that's probably the same amount of explaining.)

[PrimeJelly]

7 hours ago, Idkyou said:

 I feel sexual attraction but not really desire. Like I get horny and I masterbate but I don’t actually want it to happen. I think maybe like humping I would like but not sex itself. 

 

And I think I might be bi-romantic but I don’t think I what to identify as that because if I come out people are just gonna ask questions like ‘what is that?’ And I don’t want to explain it to everyone. Is that like rude to not want to identify as what I think I am because it would be easier for me? 

Actually feeling horny and masturbating is a total valid ace feeling and that isn't what sexual attraction is (I mean I am also uncertain what sexual attraction is since I've never experienced it). As a complete ace with no grey leaning, I will share from my experiences and say that I have a very high sex drive (libido) but its not directed towards anybody. I can just masturbate and that takes care of any sexual desires I feel. Being asexual basically means you don't want partnered sex (besides the other definition of "feeling no sexual attraction", this one explains it more clearly). Grey ace people have a mix of desires of wanting and not wanting partnered sex. Sexual people is an obvious explanation. 

 

As a biromantic person too, I just simply clarify, for those who don't know, that I'm basically bisexual without the sexual part. I'm romantically attracted to either sex but feel no desire to be sexual with anybody. What you identify as is strictly up to you and you can just say you just don't want to tell your sexual orientation to other people whenever they ask you about it. (I mean I would explain your sexual orientation to the person you want to get into a relationship with so they aren't expecting something from you that you don't want.)