weird elf Posted January 9, 2021 Share Posted January 9, 2021 Disclaimer: Does NOT explicitly mention asexuality, BUT raises some very good points that tend to come up in context with it. Split attraction model is mentioned, exclusivity of needs, poly relationships, the general assumption that romantic relationships are inherently sexual, etc ... worth watching, imo. Link to post Share on other sites
HonoraryJedi Posted January 10, 2021 Share Posted January 10, 2021 I watched through this kinda nodding and agreeing with everything she said. This is nice to hear, and this way of viewing relationships would make the world a lot easier to navigate for me as an aromantic. I had the thought "It would allow me to be valued" pass through my head and I had A Moment. It is interesting how much I can be at ease most of the time, all the while this pervasive idea of 'romantic monogamous relationships being the only thing that matters' lurking in the back of my thoughts to occasionally surface and remind me I have no value. It's an experience. Safe to say, I am in favour of dispelling the myths about monogamy which tell me I have no value x) Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted January 11, 2021 Share Posted January 11, 2021 I think there are some good concepts in this video. That being said, some of what she's discussed classifies as non-monogamous in my opinion - like agreeing that partners in a relationship are able to have sex with people outside of it. I don't think it invalidates the nature of the relationship, I just don't think it's inherently monogamous in that case. But y'know, that might be social conditioning because I grew up thinking that if you only have sex with your partner you're monogamous, and if you also have sex with other people you're either poly or have an "open" relationship arrangement, which is a form of non-mono... either way, I think the content is pretty well made and it does highlight a lot of common issues with monogamous relationships, like the mistake of romanticising abusive behaviour. Thanks for sharing Link to post Share on other sites
Forest Spirit Posted January 11, 2021 Share Posted January 11, 2021 Great video, thanks for sharing! I think it covers a bunch of misconceptions or myths affecting interpersonal relationships in general that can cause many issues especially for asexuals and aromantics as people can feel "not enough" in a monogamous mixed relationship or "left behind" by friends prioritising their own monogamous relationship as the "the one and only kind of relationship that truly matters" f.e. I've certainly struggled with this before myself and feel it is a common theme brought up in ace/aro communities Link to post Share on other sites
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