srhndrws Posted November 26, 2020 Share Posted November 26, 2020 Hi everyone - I hope I'm doing this correctly just made an account today. I came out as asexual about 5 years ago, but last year I got into a relationship with someone who I didn't mind having sexual relations with, and since then have been referring to myself as demi-sexual. But I'm now having the realisation that I'm not actually sexually attracted to this person (we are still dating) and that I just don't mind the idea of sex. I haven't wanted to do anything remotely sexual for the past 7 months, and while my partner isn't pressuring me or manipulating me, I can tell it upsets him. I have to tell him that I'm just sex neutral and not demi, but I'm not sure how to go about it. I don't think he'll take it well. He definitely won't want to date me anymore, which I understand and I'm prepared for. Any advice? Link to post Share on other sites
José Juan G S Posted November 26, 2020 Share Posted November 26, 2020 Talk to him with the truth. Whatever happens, if you tell him everything you feel, he will understand you at least at some degree, and you will also feel good for not keeping anything to yourself. Link to post Share on other sites
Riru Posted December 3, 2020 Share Posted December 3, 2020 Hello! Sex-neutral asexual here that is going through a similar thing! I started dating this guy five months ago and we hadn't had sex yet. I told him about my disinterest in sex and we're both trying to find a compromise that would make both of us happy regarding our physical relationship. To me it seems like your partner is very understanding, he'll might surprise you. Probably the best way to break it to him is to just to tell him that you're sex-neutral and that this is how you've been feeling for the past months. Considering that you have history of intimacy together, my advice would be to find a good middle ground, talk about what you feel comfortable with and what are the things that you both want from the relationship. If you get to the point where it's not possible to find a compromise, then maybe you should take different ways, but before that you might as well give it a try and work together as a team to solve the problem. Link to post Share on other sites
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