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Can you guys imagine other people having sex?


St4rry

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I’m 16 btw. I have this group chat with my friends. And they talked about sex, and what type of girls they like. I’m sorry but I can’t imagine them having sex. The act of sex looks so weird to me from watching porn. Like the human body looks so weird. Genitalia looks so weird. Why are people so attractive to that?

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José Juan G S

I can, but I don't want to, you get me? I don't see the point of doing it, it's like: "Why would you do that?"

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Well, I guess I could imagine other people having sex but I really don't want think about that. It makes me utterly uncomfortable. Not a surprise though since I'm sex-repulsed.

 

I also don't understand why people would be attracted to genitalia.

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I suppose I could. I kinda forget or ignore the fact that people around me, including people I know, have sex. Then when I'm reminded it just seems  ... alien.

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everywhere and nowhere

It depends. When it's about people I know, I indeed feel uncomfortable. Just like you - sex is not something natural for me, it's something I would never do, and even if I accept on a theoretical level that most people desire it, I have this instinctive inner reaction of questioning: "But why? Celibacy has so many advantages and so few downsides...".

Still, I have a libido, although due to increased interest in other matters, it's currently much lower than it was; it seems that I feel inclined to pleasure myself approximately once every 3-4 months... But when it was higher - yup, I did have erotic fantasies. (Now I need to "push" myself a bit to do it if I want to pleasure myself, because I need some "backdrop" and I'm proud of not being able to think about nothing.) Just exclusively about other people, never about myself. The very idea of personally having sex is horrible to me. If anything, I'm present in my fantasies as a narrator.

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Anarchist Kaos

Well yes I can, I have no reason to do it though, that being said while I don't really like sex I don't think it's gross, I just don't enjoy engaging in it and I don't like looking at it or naked people either, but it's just a thing people do that I don't I guess.

 

6 minutes ago, CBC said:

They're often not. I'm not attracted to random genitals.

 

Sex is about experiencing intimacy in a very intense and physical way. If you're in love with someone, there's a shitload of interpersonal stuff there, emotions for each other, feeling closely connected, etc. If it's more casual sex, well, it's still about experiencing human touch. In both situations obviously, it feels really good. It's not really, 'Ooooh, genitals are hot!'

Yeah, from my experience it varies from person to person, some sexual people do like looking at genitals and some others don't, so it really depends on the person more than anything else.

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fooledbysecrecy

if a fic i'm reading has a sex scene then yes it just kinda goes with the whole imagining the story experience. but sometimes i remember people in real life do it and then i'm like .......sounds fake but ok.

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Sometimes I forget that people around me usually are not asexual and they do enjoy sex, and it is hard for me to imagine them doing and when they tell me about it. I have to take a second and remember we are different and for them is completely normal 😅, but no visual anyway, because I would find it creepy.

About fiction, I guess I can imagine, but not really in a too descriptive way, maybe more abstract I guess 😅

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I can not imagine anyone irl having sex... unless they are among the very few people that I have felt sexually attracted to. This seems to be a kind of sexual blindness.

It does not apply to fictional characters though.

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I can imagine it, but probably not in the way an allo would (with desire, emotional connection, intimacy etc) it’s more like “wait, they do that? Weird, moving on”. It’s hard for me to picture people not being indifferent to sex. But I feel you on the human body being weird, movements and genitalia being weird, and the best way I can explain it to myself, understanding others do it and why is because it’s reproduction. Of course that’s not completely true, and some ways aren’t reproduction, but to kind of get a general answer for myself I just think that it’s necessary for humans to reproduce. 
 

In short, I can, but that doesn’t make me understand sex.

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rainbowocollie

I would rather not think of people in that light 😂

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Unfortunately yes. And it makes me freak out. It feels like I could accidentally ruin my relationships to others. It also feels quite embarassing. Like, a form of disbelief: "What?! They really do THAT?. i really don't want to think about it. It's non of my business... ...

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abandoned-account

I’m sure many other sex-repulsed aces feel this, but it just feels so odd when I can relate or at least understand most “universal” feelings that humans have, but when it comes to anything sexual I’m just completely foreign. What is supposedly natural and pleasurable to most humans just seems like some sort of creepy alien ritual to me. 

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SunlitMoonlight

I can!!! I can!!! I just don't attach any feelings to it and its like watching a bad fanfic scene. 

I don't enjoy it or do it when it can be avoided.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

aw great now im thinking about people having sex i dont wike it

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As others have said here i can imagine it but because I am sex repulsed it is gross for me to. Sex is a very alien thing for me and I don't understand why other people want to do it.

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Yes, and being sex-indifferent it usually doesn't affect me. I don't imagine it in too much detail, but that's more because I'm not motivated to build it up when it's between real people. 

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Real people? Not really. I kinda just see two blurry sausages. 🙃 I don't want to try too hard haha.

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Anthracite_Impreza

Can I? Yes. Do I want to? Absolutely not.

 

And much as I understand and respect it is entirely natural and fine between consenting adults, I have to agree it is a completely unnatural, alien concept to me.

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Yes but not for entertainment purposes. It normally happens when I’m told by a friend or over someone talking about stuff they’ve done.

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11 hours ago, Faleeria said:

I also don't understand why people would be attracted to genitalia.

It's because with sexual attraction there is a release of chemicals in the brain that makes everything different to how it would be if you're not attracted.

 

~*~ Asexuals educating asexuals ~*~

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I can definitely imagine it. Now in most cases I don't want to, but I still am able to do so. It's awkward as Hell when you can imagine you buddy banging your ex, and moments like those really make you hate how vivid your imagination can be. Live and let live, love and let love...and please don't give me the awkward mental image. Random strangers I'm fine with, but there's a disconnect when it's someone I know. Weird demisexual energy I suppose. 

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9 minutes ago, Moon Spirit ☽ said:

~*~ Asexuals educating asexuals ~*~

It’s great to educate, but considering asexuals have almost no experience first hand, trying to explain what allos feel isn’t the easiest lol

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In an abstract, "this is a thing people do" way, without details or anything. Its like a movie/tv scene with implied sex (characters go in a room, kissing, frantic stripping, [cut away to anything else], they wake up in bed together). I don't think about people actually having sex and its even more uncomfortable picturing people I know like that. I know they do it but I can't (and/or don't want to) see it.

 

6 hours ago, Acerna said:

I can imagine it, but probably not in the way an allo would (with desire, emotional connection, intimacy etc) it’s more like “wait, they do that? Weird, moving on”. It’s hard for me to picture people not being indifferent to sex. But I feel you on the human body being weird, movements and genitalia being weird, and the best way I can explain it to myself, understanding others do it and why is because it’s reproduction. Of course that’s not completely true, and some ways aren’t reproduction, but to kind of get a general answer for myself I just think that it’s necessary for humans to reproduce. 
 

In short, I can, but that doesn’t make me understand sex.

And then the brain sends out pleasure signals and happy chemicals because why else would people do it if it didn't feel good? It's not an instinct I have, I understand there's a whole level of emotion and bonding but I can't relate to it like sexual people do. Just in an abstract and somewhat analytical (?) way.

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15 hours ago, St4rry said:

Like the human body looks so weird. Genitalia looks so weird.

I wouldn't know. But as some sexual people tell me, it's not all about looks, it's about feelings and pleasure.

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I don't think about having sex with any real people. If I feel in the mood I tend to think of 2 imaginary good looking characters having sex, maybe they resemble movie stars, and I sort of make up a story about them in my head. Its probably not very realistic either, more like in a romantic movie scene. I guess I dont really know what realistic sex looks like. I've never done it and I dont want to watch porn, only seen sex scenes in movies.

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18 hours ago, St4rry said:

Like the human body looks so weird. Genitalia looks so weird. Why are people so attractive to that?

Makes you wonder how all the other great apes feel about their bodies.

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As an asexual person with libido, I already do. Just not into the idea of the real thing.

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It's not something I think about often but sure I guess.

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