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stampoc

Anti-bullying, acephobia, etc

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stampoc

I just want to share this video for anyone who is currently being bullied for any reason, don't worry it will get better.

It was Anti-bullying Week this week.

Sending lots of platonic love your way! Take care!

 

 

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Phoenix the II

Impossible when you're autistic

 

Yup, after finishing this, this feels like a load of bullshit. Tried quite a few of these...

 

Thanks for the video though :)

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Janus DarkFox

The methods are a bit flawed as it puts the victim in the spotlight in trying to change, while not addressing or attempting to change the bully.  Oftentimes significantly vulnerable victims may not ever be aware they’re getting bullied or able to use victim driven actions.  Not always a victim have 3rd party support but there are social care services in some places that, depending on the vulnerability, has resources in tackling it. A focus on a 3rd party support mediation should be a pathway, stopping it at the source before damage being done or mitigated.

 

I never had the awareness of being bullied until describing it in Therapy.  I was never diagnosed the Tourettes-Aspergers in school and it was a big part in bullying, for the way I talked, stammered, ticked, way that I walked, the way that I wrote, my weight, poverty level, fitness level, wearing glasses and the lack of interest in girls.  Easily from Parents, Teachers and Students all the same, Parents of other students can cause some big issues, Detention as a result of unexpected behaviour, lack of classwork or homework/being unfinished.  It is perhaps of great fortune my level of social awareness and learning difference has shielded me from psychological trauma, not a contributing factor of existing Manic-Depression.  
 

The boyfriend had a similar or greater level of bullying, which was more tragic as they where in special schools and colleges, getting bullied in class by other students, with tutor reaction to exclude the boyfriend instead, where he’d would badly react.  He has bad memories of incidences to being completely shut off from the education system entirely, where my local college has protections in place, physical security even and greater tutor awareness.  Unfortunate that since then they’ve become a complete shut in not being that able to talk, read, write or do all of anything for 10 years beyond games and junk food, right up to reaching 30 stone and his first Heart attack at the age of 30 had to stop this level of isolation. Both me and the BF has never been able to access the World as we know it, like Work or other taken for granted things, while I went on to pass a technical computing degree and exhausted all access to work pathways until the age cut-off of support here at 30 years of age.

 

Me whole family has described a level of bullying in school and work, my dad particularly contributing towards Paranoid Dementia, mother contributing factor towards chronic Post partum Psychosis/Depression after I was born and sis for their Acute Depression, it’s likely we are an entire family of Autistics to me.  Looking at it it’s like I’m the only sane one here all things considering.  Bullying is systemic everywhere and it’s really thought to tackle it, if having the awareness of it and tragic that bystanders would rather do nothing either.  Bullying efforts often miss the mark a great deal, there isn’t an anti-bullying week here.

 

It’s perhaps a good thing what I know myself being LGBT, Asexual and Tourettes-Autistic and probably being Furry and being socially aware than in my youth.

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theV0ID

Well that video's a load of nonsense.

 

Sounds like the sort of things my mum used to tell me when I was a kid... "Be more confident, stand up straight, engage the bully and they won't know what to do, show that they don't upset you and they'll get bored and give up, remember they're only hurting you because they're hurt themselves, make sure they know you do Tae Kwon Do". None of it made even the slightest bit of difference, aside for potentially giving them more ammunition.

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AceWing

The amount of people not wanting to change and expecting the world to adapt at their whimsy on this thread is amazing. 

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Phoenix the II
1 hour ago, AceWing said:

The amount of people not wanting to change and expecting the world to adapt at their whimsy on this thread is amazing. 

Please, do keep defending the behavior of bullies. And blame their victims for being bullied. -_- 

 

Most often people have tried changing so much already from all the bullying in their lifetime. That this statement is really unfair to those.

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Janus DarkFox

A big reminder here that this thread is support for and sympathy with anti-bullying themes in regards to anti-bullying week, especially in relation to being Asexual.  Comments that expect a victim to change often enables bullying further, especially in members that cannot do anything about it themselves for a whole host of reasons.

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LeChat
7 hours ago, Janus DarkFox said:

...I was never diagnosed the Tourettes-Aspergers in school and it was a big part in bullying, for the way I talked, stammered, ticked, way that I walked, the way that I wrote, my weight, poverty level, fitness level, wearing glasses and the lack of interest in girls.  Easily from Parents, Teachers and Students all the same, Parents of other students can cause some big issues...

I'm sorry to hear that you had to go through all of that, growing up.

 

While, I think, I understand part of the video, where the guy might be trying to encourage bully victims to focus more on their own lives, trying to improve their own mood, rather than allowing others' bullying behavior toward them have them stay feeling depressed, bitter, angry, etc. all or most the time, I also understand that this can be difficult, especially for some people who might be neurodivergent, have Tourettes, etc. who might be bullied often (also, due to living in ableist societies, where systemic racism exists).

 

I know it's something I struggle with, too, trying not to let myself feel down, when being bullied, harassed, etc.

 

Have you heard about the book and movie, "Motherless Brooklyn?" The main character is a detective with Tourettes, and some people with Tourettes--who saw the film or read the book--said that they felt it was a good portrayal, that there aren't too many films featuring a character with Tourettes, played in a more, serious, realistic way, rather than used as a punchline or comedic joke.

 

I was thinking about watching it, but I wanted to make sure that it was an accurate portrayal and not a terrible characterization or inaccurate representation of people with Tourettes.

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Mizzletoe

There is advice there for those being bullied for lack of confidence, but I agree there is nothing for other things that might attract bullies.  I was mildly bullied for having a birthmark when I was at school, it never got too bad but went away when the birthmark faded, not because of anything I could do sadly.  Online bullying is a big thing these days and I would love to hear from anti-bullying coaches about how to tackle that.  There is an issue causing major problems for a group of people at the moment that I identify with, it even affects AVEN sadly, and is hard to get away from.  On Facebook even posting a comment can bring a load of mocking abuse to these people yet they are told to stop whining, it's just a joke, it's funny, get a sense of humour, change their identity etc etc.   

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AceWing
7 hours ago, Phoenix the II said:

Please, do keep defending the behavior of bullies. And blame their victims for being bullied. -_- 

 

Most often people have tried changing so much already from all the bullying in their lifetime. That this statement is really unfair to those.

Oh nah, bullies have really bad behavior. I just feel that context is often dropped and sometimes, only sometimes, victims MIGHT be doing something, y'know? 

 

I can't say for sure and neither can anyone else. But my comment is more about the mindset that some people refuse to adopt. Bullies will be bad and they can't change. But I can just say from personal experience, not caring about them and making your life is super empowering.

 

To dust off the prospect and advice in this video is just as fallacious as inane reasons for bullying.

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Phoenix the II
34 minutes ago, AceWing said:

not caring about them

Good advice!

 

34 minutes ago, AceWing said:

To dust off the prospect and advice in this video is just as fallacious as inane reasons for bullying.

I don't care about your opinion, you haven't lived my life.

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AceWing
31 minutes ago, Phoenix the II said:

Good advice!

 

I don't care about your opinion, you haven't lived my life.

Okay. 

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