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Have you been on a date by accident?


Firefly8

Have you been on a date you didn't know was a date?  

86 members have voted

  1. 1. Have you ever accidentally gone out on a date with someone?

    • Yes
      29
    • No
      39
    • Unsure, maybe
      17
    • Other
      1


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Have you ever been invited out with someone, but didn't realize until later, or when you were already on the date with them, that it was a date?  🙋‍♀️

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Phoenix the II

Yes, once... Thought we had some good fun. They said so too. Then asking why they got silent... well... yea 😕 

 

I just always feel like, no one would/could ever be interested in me like that, so... 

 

 

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How can it be a date if you didn't know?

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Twice. In high school with a guy I met in my math class; I thought he just wanted to hang out and watch a movie. Again in college, same deal

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Yes, sort of. It was an outing with a friend where he ended up flirting with me a lot. (We had been friends for a few years at this point.)

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RoseGoesToYale
6 minutes ago, Sarah-Sylvia said:

How can it be a date if you didn't know?

It can happen when both parties aren't clear about what their expectations are for the meeting. It usually results in awkwardness on one or both sides.

 

I went on a "date" like that, and it was... ugh. I was in my freshman year of college and a friend I made the previous year (sophomore in high school) asked me if I wanted to go see a movie. I thought it was just two friends going to see a movie (and nothing romantic either, it was Planet of The Apes). The whole thing was awkward from beginning to end. He barely said a word the whole time and suddenly became really nervous. During the movie things just felt... off. Afterward I asked some friends about it, and they said yeah, it sounds like he thought it was date.

 

Thing is, I wouldn't have minded it being a date, but I'd rather he'd been up front about it. Maybe he didn't have the courage to say it. He was a nice dude, but after that we just kinda stopped speaking.

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5 minutes ago, LightningRose said:

I went on a "date" like that, and it was... ugh. I was in my freshman year of college and a friend I made the previous year (sophomore in high school) asked me if I wanted to go see a movie. I thought it was just two friends going to see a movie (and nothing romantic either, it was Planet of The Apes). The whole thing was awkward from beginning to end. He barely said a word the whole time and suddenly became really nervous. During the movie things just felt... off. Afterward I asked some friends about it, and they said yeah, it sounds like he thought it was date.

 

Thing is, I wouldn't have minded it being a date, but I'd rather he'd been up front about it. Maybe he didn't have the courage to say it. He was a nice dude, but after that we just kinda stopped speaking.

Exact same thing, both times

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58 minutes ago, LightningRose said:

It can happen when both parties aren't clear about what their expectations are for the meeting. It usually results in awkwardness on one or both sides.

 

I went on a "date" like that, and it was... ugh. I was in my freshman year of college and a friend I made the previous year (sophomore in high school) asked me if I wanted to go see a movie. I thought it was just two friends going to see a movie (and nothing romantic either, it was Planet of The Apes). The whole thing was awkward from beginning to end. He barely said a word the whole time and suddenly became really nervous. During the movie things just felt... off. Afterward I asked some friends about it, and they said yeah, it sounds like he thought it was date.

 

Thing is, I wouldn't have minded it being a date, but I'd rather he'd been up front about it. Maybe he didn't have the courage to say it. He was a nice dude, but after that we just kinda stopped speaking.

Sucks that he was too shy and that you both didn't talk after.

 

Well, to me it's not a date if one person doesnt know or doesn't want to :P
But I get people mean that the other person thought it was, or wanted it to be.

With my first girlfriend, before we actually got closer, we went out for tea a few times, and I didn't consider that a date even if I wanted things to go further, I just saw it as.. going out for tea :P and getting to know each other. What if her eyes it was a date tho? 😮 nah I don't think so. But it's not like I know too much about dating too, but  that's just what I think, that unless it's clear enough, it's more friendly.

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Moon Spirit ☽

I think this guy from work was trying to trick me into that, reflecting back on what happened. He was very insistent about going at nighttime and that freaked me out and I just ended up saying forget it.

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Comrade Jade Cross

Not unless you consider having lunch with a co-worker as a date. But we were both focused on the food so I doubt it was anything beyond that

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local burnout.

Unfortunately, yes. I had a classmate/new-ish friend ask me if I wanted to visit a local museum and then grab dinner afterwards. It was something we had talked about doing before, so I just assumed we were hanging out platonically. I honestly had a great time, but it wasn't until later that night when she invited me into her apartment that I realized what an idiot I was. The "date" ended with a really uncomfortable conversation and she basically stopped talking to me after that.

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I freaking went to prom with someone by accident. I thought we were going as friends. Thankfully they understood and we're still friends. 

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Yep. I’m ashamed of how old I was when I finally figured out that men chatting me up at parties and wanting to hang out were not looking to make friends. When I finally figured that out I tried a few times to force the friendship matter by being very upfront about not wanting anything romantic or sexual. That never really worked out either. I used to get really frustrated every time a “hangout” turned out being a date, but I guess a big part of it was just my not being fluent in that particular social language. 

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5 times with 5 different people eek. Because most of my friends are female I just always see it as a friendly catch-up. Can't people use the word date when asking me out? like actually its so annoying when they ask if we can organize another date and I'm like 'Woah there, is that what this is?!' One of the five people was a guy but that's a story for another time lol. I'm so clueless when it comes to this stuff (clearly).

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MakeupJunkie4

Yes. I was a naive 17-year-old and a friend and I arranged to play mini golf together. He said he was bringing one of his friends, and I said I'd bring one of mine and we could play girls against guys. So we show up and there's an extra guy they brought along, and my cousin was staying with us that day - so that made 6 teenagers. Everyone (except me) seemed a bit awkward. My mom ended up butting in and said she'd go along to "chaperone" (which I hated), and yeah it was just really uncomfortable all around, My mom kept trying too hard to make everyone laugh and draw attention to herself, which humiliated me - but the others reached out later on and said they'd had fun. I was still embarrassed but we all survived. It wasn't until we dropped my cousin off that my mom said to her, "Well, tell your mom it turned out to be a triple date!" and THAT'S when it hit me...it was a date...?!

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I was 19 (? 20 maybe?) and a friend invited me out to a film and a meal. We had done this a couple of times before with other friends, so I assumed that we were going as a group like normal.  The time comes and it's just us, he's all dressed up, tried to hold my hand in the cinema and kiss me afterwards... it was very awkward. He did not take being rejected well, apparently I "led him on" 🙄

 

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No. 

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fairyofsuburbia

I'm beginning to think I may have been on more accidental dates than planned ones...

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During highschool. Went ice skating with a friend from my class. I had brought my little brother with me (why not?). Later the guy wanted to hold my hands to warm them - that felt very akward. Still didn't had an idea... My brother later told me: "you were so cute together". Still, it didn't dawn on me. Only years later...

Oh, and then that other friend, he had a small motor boat and took me for a ride. Suddenly he changed into acting differently. I think I remember him saying, he only ever brings here girls he's into (and I was thinking: oh, making an exception here...).

That's the only two I believe might have been intended as a date. Not sure though.

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Yep. A friend asked me to work on some literature homework together. Brought me to a cat café, and we worked on the poetry reading. It wasn't until like a month later that I realized it was supposed to be a date. 

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Never! I plan my moves in this regard :wub: and fully aware of the other's intentions.

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9 minutes ago, GingerRose said:

No, but then again it might have been an accident for the other person :D 

I've certainly been on such dates before. Well, at least one time. I thought we both realized that I intended it to be a date, and the other party didn't realize it, until she did, and then she got extraordinarily uncomfortable.

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4 minutes ago, uniQChick said:

and fully aware of the other's intentions.

I mean, I like to think I know what's going on. :D 

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