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Influence of Medication on being Ace?


AmACEzing Panda

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AmACEzing Panda

HI,

It's ya inexperienced girl here. I recently found out that I identify as Asexual. Tried to talk to my mom about it a couple times, but she said something along the lines of: but you're on anti-depressants for over 2 years now, maybe that's why you think you're asexual. 

 

I started thinking and getting insecure, but I thought one of the side effects of Anti-depressants was loss of Libido, not the loss of sexual attraction? But I might be completly wrong. Anyone who knows something about this or is in a similar situation?

 

❤️

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Fraggle Underdark

I know SSRIs can cause loss of sex drive, though I don't know specifically if it's libido, attraction, or both. I had assumed it could be both. 

 

In any case there's nothing stopping you from identifying as asexual for now. Did you experience sexual attraction before the medication? If you did, or you're not sure or were too young for lack of attraction to be meaningful, then it seems very plausible that you'll experience sexual attraction if you go off the meds.

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I didn't identify as ace until a few years after I started taking medication for something. I worried that would lead people to assume it was just a side effect and not real. But I worked through that argument with logical reasoning: the reason I didn't identify as asexual before starting this medication was because I assumed there was something wrong with me that I had to fix. Medication helped that. I still don't feel inclined to have sex. It ruled out the illness as the reason I was apathetic towards it.

 

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There's nothing in the world that changes Sexual Attraction as far as I can see for myself.

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Anthracite_Impreza

Most people on antidepressants still know that in an ideal world they'd want sex. The fact you don't suggests you could be ace, but if you're young don't tie yourself too strongly to any label. Puberty and development is a rough, confusing time for us all.

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AmACEzing Panda

Thanks for the answers. I'm 18 right now, but still no desire/attraction to have sex. Had a boyfriend who did want that. Did not work out. I just don't get it. Doesn't feel nice at all... So that was already a sign that I could be ace, amongst others ofc

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I've previously been on medication that killed my libido, and it had no effect on my asexuality. I was asexual before, during, and since that time, the only difference was that I had no interest is masturbation.

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On 9/23/2020 at 8:37 AM, AmACEzing Panda said:

HI,

It's ya inexperienced girl here. I recently found out that I identify as Asexual. Tried to talk to my mom about it a couple times, but she said something along the lines of: but you're on anti-depressants for over 2 years now, maybe that's why you think you're asexual. 

 

I started thinking and getting insecure, but I thought one of the side effects of Anti-depressants was loss of Libido, not the loss of sexual attraction? But I might be completly wrong. Anyone who knows something about this or is in a similar situation?

 

❤️

Yeah when I went on anti-depressants (I'm not ace), my drive, my attraction, my libido (even my love of fictional characters, even my ability to find people attractive on a purely aesthetic level) dropped to below zero. Fortunately I was in my mid-twenties so could tell the difference from how I used to be and eventually went off them because it was... frikken awful. I really don't like the idea of kids and teens being put on them while their sexuality etc is still developing because that's already a confusing-enough time :c 

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On 9/23/2020 at 10:43 AM, Janus DarkFox said:

There's nothing in the world that changes Sexual Attraction as far as I can see for myself.

when I went on them, I stopped even being able to experience even basic aesthetic attraction. For some people SSRIs just kill that entire side of you.. the side that makes you interested in any way in other people (sexual, romantic, aesthetic, even my interest in fictional people). When I tried talking to the stupid psychiatrist about it she was like 'that just means you need a stronger dose until the lack of those things stops upsetting you' (like wtf???). 

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Luftschlosseule

Antidepressants do weird shit to you, which is why it's important to find the right one. If the antidepressant kills everything in you, it's not the right one. 
I once was on a medication that made me think my pillow was going to attack me and I quit the stuff.

 

For me, it's more about libido than orientation. I still experience aestetic attraction.

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2 hours ago, PanFicto. said:

when I went on them, I stopped even being able to experience even basic aesthetic attraction. For some people SSRIs just kill that entire side of you.. the side that makes you interested in any way in other people (sexual, romantic, aesthetic, even my interest in fictional people). When I tried talking to the stupid psychiatrist about it she was like 'that just means you need a stronger dose until the lack of those things stops upsetting you' (like wtf???). 

Yeah interesting this as every experience is personal on meds.  I can place where my mind was at before illness, during illness, during SSRI medication, the transition to a Mood Stabiliser and after illness.

 

Mid 20s was the start of the illness and I can recall having nothing in terms Sexuality beyond some functional arousal.  Arousal dropped during depressive illness and I was put on a common SSRI, which did nothing but make me further ill, unrelated to sexuality like nausea, worse sleep, more frequent migraines that sort of thing.

 

Then came what docs described a Manic Episode with one symptom bring almost always being aroused for 2 weeks during the mood swing.  When placed on a Mood Stabiliser the transition period between the 2 meds was the worst mixed episode I’ve experienced I’ve ever had, like delusions, nightmares, further migraines, being woken up by voices that sort of thing for 3 weeks.

 

Several months on the Mood Stabiliser has put me back to my mindset before Depression took hold, with functional arousal about the same and adjusted with age.  


During all this also improved diet, exercise and so on.  Also the formal diagnostics come back with a lot of things like the Manic-Depression, Tourettes-Aspergers, chronic migraines and so on.

 

In on meds that are known to increase sexual interest otherwise and docs have a theory that I may have always had a depression at a very early age and may have benefited sooner if anything was picked up in school. 

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I really don't like the idea of kids and teens being put on them while their sexuality etc is still developing because that's already a confusing-enough time :c 

I mean, I would think not feeling like shit all the time to the point you're potentially suicidal over it kinda takes precedence over making sure you keep your libido

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LovelyLittleLonely

I've recently changed type of medication and on the last one I had no libido at all, but I've noticed that my libido has now increased (like I now want to masturbate), but it hasn't changed my attraction to other people. My libido is now present, but I'm still very much asexual. 

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AmACEzing Panda

I switched meds about a year ago, because I did feel like a zombie. The ones i'm on now, allow me to actually feel stuff. I experience aesthetic attraction and I feel the platonic love for my friends and family deeply, so that's also why im confused I think

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8 hours ago, Philip027 said:

I mean, I would think not feeling like shit all the time to the point you're potentially suicidal over it kinda takes precedence over making sure you keep your libido

Very well much depends on how important sexuality and relationships are to a person.  I’ve read some internet stories that details a persons lack of and explicit interest in wanting sex, libido, relationships and so on, and how it feels utterly devastating to them and attempts to create connections to achieve that goal feels worse than not bothering, though yet feel utterly guilt ridden and with a shattered self esteem feeds back around to further worsen such depression.

 

AVEN rarely has examples of sexuals losing interest, therefore are now Asexual.  To some Sexuality is their world and to have depression take it away.  While Asexuals with Depression does exist, it’s often a lot of these examples, are people knowing already they’re ace before depression took a hold on them.

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While Asexuals with Depression does exist,

Yeah, I know; I am one.

 

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Very well much depends on how important sexuality and relationships are to a person.

True, but they shouldn't be your biggest priority as a kid/teenager still in school.

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