monstarea Posted September 1, 2020 Share Posted September 1, 2020 Hi! This question might sound really dumb but typically do allosexuals get aroused and/or feel sexual attraction/drive to have sex etc. when seeing genitals? Especially heterosexual women seeing a man's genitals (only specifying as I'm heteromantic ace(maybe gray-ace) and before this i just thought I was heterosexual)? Before I learnt about asexuality, I always thought that women didn't get sexual feelings when seeing men's genitals but after recently learning about asexuality I'm wondering if (typically) they actually do. Like I thought it was just an act to please the man and make them feel like it really did turn us on etc. like how some women fake orgasms. Link to post Share on other sites
Sarah-Sylvia Posted September 1, 2020 Share Posted September 1, 2020 24 minutes ago, monstarea said: Hi! This question might sound really dumb but typically do allosexuals get aroused and/or feel sexual attraction/drive to have sex etc. when seeing genitals? Especially heterosexual women seeing a man's genitals (only specifying as I'm heteromantic ace(maybe gray-ace) and before this i just thought I was heterosexual)? Before I learnt about asexuality, I always thought that women didn't get sexual feelings when seeing men's genitals but after recently learning about asexuality I'm wondering if (typically) they actually do. Like I thought it was just an act to please the man and make them feel like it really did turn us on etc. like how some women fake orgasms. Some do get aroused by genitals, but definitely not everyone. It depends how sexual they are and I'd say how romantic as well. A woman might only like the penis as part of the person and the intimacy, not for itself or just for sex. While some might be hornier people that do get turned on by them alone. Link to post Share on other sites
Memento1 Posted September 1, 2020 Share Posted September 1, 2020 I view sexuality very much as a spectrum, with a whole range of sexual experience and expression beyond dichotomous asexual or allosexual, so I wouldn't make any kind of statement about what all allosexuals feel, but I would say quite a lot of heterosexual women will not get aroused from an image of men's genitals alone. Like I would say most women would really dislike getting a pic of some man's junk randomly. There's a bunch of scientific studies demonstrating that men typically rely more on visual cues for arousal than women do. Usually more is needed for women to really get aroused - other sensory input like touch, some form of trusting relationship, a feeling of mutual give-and-take, or for others a feeling of dominance or subservience. Biological arousal itself usually requires a certain degree of relaxation along with a feeling of excitement (which is why many people with chronic stress have trouble getting aroused and why dick pics that incite a feeling of threat would be the opposite of arousing). That being said, in a trusting relationship with a sense of safety, affection, and a little bit of excitement, a partner's genitals can absolutely be a turn-on for me - it's not just an act. I'd even say that's part of why I label as demisexual: it takes an extraordinary amount of safety and trust for me to feel that way. It is strange, because I would say outside of those situations, they remind me more of ugly underwater sea creatures. Link to post Share on other sites
monstarea Posted September 1, 2020 Author Share Posted September 1, 2020 Thank you both, for your responses! I thought that what you both put could be the case but I was unsure as I'm questioning so much stuff after realising i'm on the ace spectrum aha😂 and I love that comparison to ugly underwater sea creatures @Memento1 it made me laugh! Whenever people talk about dick pics I always think of this meme🤣 Link to post Share on other sites
Luvic Posted September 1, 2020 Share Posted September 1, 2020 For me, it depends on the context. Genitals are not gonna make me feel anything on their own. I feel attraction more towards "the whole picture" and the "performance of sexuality" (if that makes any sense). That being said, I have a very low libido and my body rarely ever responds to sexual stimulation, so maybe I'm not the best example. Link to post Share on other sites
KiraS Posted September 1, 2020 Share Posted September 1, 2020 Nudity on its own doesn't magically turn my crank. Link to post Share on other sites
Lara Black Posted September 2, 2020 Share Posted September 2, 2020 I adore my partner’s genitals. Seeing them, noticing how they react to my touch or my looks (when he is turned on by me) etc. – it’s something that makes me tremble with passion. But a penis in general (like a random dickpic) doesn’t do a thing to boost my arousal. Still, I can’t say that I’m aroused simply by “the whole picture” – I am, of course, but the penis of the man I love does magic to my excitement. Just to clarify - sexual woman here with what I think is a pretty medium sex drive. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted September 2, 2020 Share Posted September 2, 2020 13 hours ago, monstarea said: Hi! This question might sound really dumb but typically do allosexuals get aroused and/or feel sexual attraction/drive to have sex etc. when seeing genitals? Especially heterosexual women seeing a man's genitals (only specifying as I'm heteromantic ace(maybe gray-ace) and before this i just thought I was heterosexual)? Before I learnt about asexuality, I always thought that women didn't get sexual feelings when seeing men's genitals but after recently learning about asexuality I'm wondering if (typically) they actually do. Like I thought it was just an act to please the man and make them feel like it really did turn us on etc. like how some women fake orgasms. I am a bit odd in that my libido can't be turned on by external factors (I'm female-bodied by the way), but when my libido is turned on and I'm aroused, I loooove to see/think about etc the genitals of the man or woman I am currently attracted to. For me, it's a hunger for the genitals themselves, what they can do to me and what I can do to them. Oh and I like to masturbate when giving oral to a guy, and I orgasm when he cums in my mouth. Not for his pleasure but for my own pleasure (sadly I haven't got to do that in years but maybe one day ehe). Link to post Share on other sites
KiraS Posted September 2, 2020 Share Posted September 2, 2020 Shortly following death and taxes, two certainties in life are that at some point you or someone you love will become disabled for a period of time, and basic bodily hygiene care is going to be involved in that. You quickly get over the idea that nudity=sex when hospital gowns and absorbent materials enter the picture. Link to post Share on other sites
KiraS Posted September 2, 2020 Share Posted September 2, 2020 In real life? Probably not. From the repeated questions here about whether we get aroused by it? It makes the point. Link to post Share on other sites
Sea Lemon Posted September 4, 2020 Share Posted September 4, 2020 On 9/1/2020 at 8:56 PM, monstarea said: Hi! This question might sound really dumb but typically do allosexuals get aroused and/or feel sexual attraction/drive to have sex etc. when seeing genitals? Especially heterosexual women seeing a man's genitals It varies wildly tbh, but for a lot of people, no - the most common reaction to dick pics for example seems to be disgust or anger. Seeing an intimate partner's genitals may cause arousal/desire, but again not always. Potentially TMI below: Spoiler My fiance and I are often naked around each other and whilst absolutely attracted to each other, are very rarely aroused by just seeing each other naked; but equally there are absolutely people who are the opposite - I had a previous partner who would become aroused just by even seeing me partially undressed. (For reference, I'm a bisexual woman) So tldr, sexual people's experiences of sexuality are hugely varied, and we're not always going to react the same to the same stimuli. Link to post Share on other sites
MrDane Posted September 6, 2020 Share Posted September 6, 2020 Genitals? No? Genitals in a sexual context, where I play a part? Sure! Link to post Share on other sites
Aurora_ Posted September 7, 2020 Share Posted September 7, 2020 To add to what others have already said! No! There is nothing innately arousing about genitals. Infact, often the exact opposite for me. As a woman, when I see a dick pic.... I feel repulsion and get what I call the “ick”. (All my female friends also feel this way) In a sexual context with someone I am attracted to though, I find the look and feel of male genitals very arousing! So, it’s definitely situational. And different for everyone I imagine. Link to post Share on other sites
uhtred Posted September 8, 2020 Share Posted September 8, 2020 Completely situation dependent. I would say that I find women in erotic situations to be arousing - being naked a part of of that, but neither necessary nor sufficient. So if woman I was otherwise attracted to intentionally walked into the room naked, I would find it arousing. OTOH if a happened by accident to see a random woman naked, it wouldn't mean anything to me Link to post Share on other sites
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