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Concerned: Was I romantically interested and no longer not? Or am I Aro/Ace?


Allurianna

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Hi there.  I've known my current partner for 12 some years now. According to them, we have been official for almost 4 years. When we first started dating I was fine with having sex and kissing. I even explored some kinks with them. The longer we're together though, the less I want to even be touched. I don't know if it's because I don't  love them though. I don't mind being with them, but I'm also not 100% needing to stay together. I feel like we've been friends so long it just doesn't matter. But at the same time. I haven't  "liked" someone for 18 years. The last time I remember having a crush was in 10th grade. So now I'm not sure romance was ever part of the equation. I just have no idea //if// I feel anything. What are those feelings supposed to feel like? How do they manifest? I just don't know. 

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If you think you may have experienced some level of romantic/sexual attraction at the start of your relationship that slowly dwindled away, you may be frayromantic/fraysexual. But if you never felt any romantic/sexual inclination whatsoever at the start of your relationship, perhaps you just had a strong platonic bond that you mistook for romantic attraction? 

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14 hours ago, Spill said:

If you think you may have experienced some level of romantic/sexual attraction at the start of your relationship that slowly dwindled away, you may be frayromantic/fraysexual. But if you never felt any romantic/sexual inclination whatsoever at the start of your relationship, perhaps you just had a strong platonic bond that you mistook for romantic attraction? 

I don't know how to feel about that term.  It sounds like something made up for people who can't commit q.q like it makes me feel worse.  At the same time though, it makes sense. In my past, I was never bothered by a relationship ending. It just seemed like they ran their course and I was apathetic from then on... 

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