Amber Z Posted July 8, 2020 Share Posted July 8, 2020 I’m pretty sure I’m demisexual, but there were a few things I was wondering about. Firstly, I still can look at someone and say they are sexy or attractive, though I don’t want to have sex with them. I have a type when it comes to attractiveness, but I’m not sexually attracted to that person unless I’ve had an emotional connection. I’ve only ever wanted to have sex with one person and that was my partner at the time. I wasn’t sexually attracted to anyone else although I could see people as attractive. I also still masturbate and have a libido, but I can’t do it to the thought of someone bc that just grosses me out (except for when it was my partner at the time). I also enjoy smutty fanfiction and occasionally smut art/comics, but I cannot stand porn. Porn grosses me out. Sometimes reading smut arouses me, but it arouses me more when I know about the characters I’m reading about and the characters have an established emotional relationship. I believe I fit the category of demisexual, but I wanted to make sure that these other things didn’t point to me being something other than demisexual. I’ve never met a demisexual person, so I’ve never really been able to ask directly if I truly fit the category. Link to post Share on other sites
Sarah-Sylvia Posted July 8, 2020 Share Posted July 8, 2020 Yes. 😜 It's possible that you have a little bit of aversion to some things too, but even then it sounds it's part of you to be demisexual and the aversion isn't really covering up anything. Some dont like posts that are just straight up yes or no, it's better if you can think things through for yourself, but I think you pretty much know it already and you're just looking for confirmation. Here people consider sexual attraction to really mean that it could lead you to want sex with them. That it doesnt do that for you unless you have a closer bond with them is telling enough. And it even follows you with how characters in fiction are, so I think it's a good label if you like it. Doesn't mean you can't be open to more of yourself as well. Link to post Share on other sites
ThePurpleHyacinth Posted July 13, 2020 Share Posted July 13, 2020 Hello Amber Z, I'm a demisexual and I found several familiar-sounding points from your post: * I still can look at someone and say they are sexy or attractive, though I don’t want to have sex with them * I’m not sexually attracted to that person unless I’ve had an emotional connection * I wasn’t sexually attracted to anyone else although I could see people as attractive All of these are something I can agree with as a demisexual person :) I think it is a pretty cool trait to just be able to drool over other people and not really wanting to "do" them 👍 However, I also think it is sooo important you learn to trust your own instincts and feelings. Therefore, I'd like to encourage you listen to both of them. I only can offer you some personal viewpoints and suggestions, but no effective solutions. Best to you! 👍 Link to post Share on other sites
Lw3 Posted July 29, 2020 Share Posted July 29, 2020 This is exactly how I feel too, although I have always know how I felt it is only recently that I thought I may be Demisexual. Apart from my husband I have never felt sexual attraction to anyone, he is the only person I have actually wanted to have sex with. I do find other people attractive both men and women, but it is more aww they look lovely or have a nice smile hair, but I would absolutely never want to have sex with the. Even now if a guy pays attention to me I hate it and do not feel excited or attractive, no matter how good looking they are. I have experienced admiration and crushes on people for their personality but still never in a sexual way. Although I am only sexually attracted to my husband if we are in emotional conflict I can not enjoy sex with him until what ever it is is resolved, the affectionate and loving my husband is the more I want and enjoy she with him, without the affection and love I struggle. So I definitely feel I am Demisexual. Link to post Share on other sites
Karekare Posted August 5, 2020 Share Posted August 5, 2020 On 7/8/2020 at 1:06 AM, Amber Z said: I also still masturbate and have a libido, but I can’t do it to the thought of someone bc that just grosses me out (except for when it was my partner at the time). I also enjoy smutty fanfiction and occasionally smut art/comics, but I cannot stand porn. Porn grosses me out. I'm demi and this part is me 100% I can't really see people as attractive because for me aesthetic attraction is tied to my demisexuality/romanticism, and I don't have a very strong libido, but I think it's totally possible you're demi that experiences aesthetic attraction Link to post Share on other sites
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