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Shadowscast

Hello! (Or: time for my once-per-decade AVEN check-in, I guess)

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Shadowscast

Hello, out there!

 

My profile (which I just checked) says that I joined in 2009, and have never posted.

 

I think that I actually first joined in the year 2000 (ish) and did post a few times way back than.  I probably re-joined in 2009, after nearly a decade away, and I'm sure that I posted once or twice, but I guess it's so long ago that those posts are lost to the mists of time.

 

So I've had the word "asexual" to describe myself for about 20 years now, wow.  And I've had 20 years of visiting this forum extremely sporadically!  Thanks for being there for me, AVEN.

 

Umm, so, what's up with me?

 

I first discovered AVEN through a column in a local free weekly counterculture newspaper.  I was 22 years old, and after being very confused about my sexuality through my whole adolescence and early adulthood, I was delighted to discover that "asexuality" was a thing, because finally I knew what I was!

 

And then, content to have that validation, I basically just went off and lived my life.  For twenty years.  Wow, time flies.

 

I'm back here posting now ... um, on a whim, mostly?  But also I recently had a nice real-life asexual experience, which I feel like sharing with others who might relate to some of it.  In short, I came out as asexual in a social context which included several of my work colleagues, and a little later one of my colleagues came to me privately and told me that she was also asexual, and furthermore that I was the first real-life person she'd known to also have that identity.  And then we had a nice chat!

 

I'll make a longer post about that experience in another thread, outside of the Welcome Lounge.  I just figured I might as well re-introduce myself properly, since presumably nobody remembers me from 10 or 20 years ago!

 

My very brief biography and context: I'm 42 years old, and I identify as a bi-romantic asexual.  I've been heterosexually married for 18 years, and I have a 12-year old kid.  My partner has known that I'm asexual since before we got married, and is cool with it.  We're poly, so he has sex with other folks (although not lately, due to COVID-19, but that's a weird situation that we're all living through!).  I'm very grateful to AVEN for existing, and for giving me the gift of knowing that I didn't have to choose between straight, gay, or bi to legitimately exist as a human being.

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Ace Bookdragon

Welcome back! :cake:🍰🎂

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KrysLostInSpace

The cat beckons you to returnnnnnnn. mEoW


 

Well, thanks for crawling out of your hole to check in! See you in twenty years!

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WaywardHeroine

Thank's for sharing! 🍰  I'm so glad things are going well for you!

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NightLight

Welcome back! It always makes me happy to hear stories of other asexuals just living their lives happily. Thank you for sharing! I hope you have a good time here, even if it is your third time around! Maybe it'll be a third times the charm type of deal and you'll stick around longer this time! Or maybe not. Whatever makes you happy!

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Lichley

Welcome back! There’s always cake for you here friend :D 

Gluten+Free+Rainbow+Cake.jpg

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MichaelTannock

Welcome back to AVEN!

 

Congratulations on the coming out, I think finding another asexual is a very positive outcome!

 

Incidentally, it is a tradition here to welcome new members by offering cake, and here's an "Under the Sea" cake (all edible),

https://cakesdecor.com/cakes/288263-under-the-sea-sugar-artists-collaboration-piece-1

wzda1xfpmxtw6e2ifgb2.jpg

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will123

It took me 12 years from my first visit in 2005 until 2017 when I googled AVEN on a lark to see if it was still around. Much to my surprise (I know a lot of forums that have come and gone over the years) it was still active. 

 

Since then I've come out to several of my longtime friends as asexual and even though none of them had heard of it, they were fine with my decision (no you haven't bet the right girl comments). Thru AVEN I've met four other asexuals too.

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Shadowscast

Thanks for the welcome, everyone, and for the cake!  That's a new tradition since the last time I was here, and it's very fun.  My mouth is watering!

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