scarletlatitude Posted May 30, 2020 Share Posted May 30, 2020 Where are my fellow clumsy people? I sprained my ankle last night... for like the 4th time. Link to post Share on other sites
Scottthespy Posted May 30, 2020 Share Posted May 30, 2020 I've broken my arm and ankle, given myself a concussion, dislocated my knee, sprained my ankle dozens of times, scratched my eye, skinned small sections of myself several times, I'm constantly covered in bruises, I have a few pieces of gravel embedded in my body, my hip is permanently messed up due to an accident when I was young, I often bite my tongue to the point of blood, and one time I cartwheeled over a glass cup (didn't know it was there, long grass) and it smashed and I had to spend about an hour picking glass out of my shredded palm. I also frequently slip and fall down the stairs, kick solid things, hit my head, and trip over patterns in the carpet. Those don't usually result in injury though, as I've become very good at falling through copious amounts of practice. Link to post Share on other sites
AceMissBehaving Posted May 30, 2020 Share Posted May 30, 2020 I am one!!! I’m constantly bumping into things, and tripping over things. I’ve fallen on stage so many times now I no longer miss a beat, in fact I have go to “falling choreography” that I don’t even have to think about I’ve used it that often Link to post Share on other sites
Homer Posted May 30, 2020 Share Posted May 30, 2020 Should've called this "Clums Club". Missed opportunity Not really frequently injured, but when I do injure myself, it's because of idiocy. Personal favourites: (1) Too lazy to get out the ironing board. Decided to iron a shirt on the bed really quick. Plugged the iron in. Started ironing. Rearranged shirt. Tipped iron over. Iron lands on arm. The mark is still visible five months later. (2) Tried to cut a block of frozen meat. Stabbed my hand. Link to post Share on other sites
AceMissBehaving Posted May 30, 2020 Share Posted May 30, 2020 45 minutes ago, Homer said: Should've called this "Clums Club". Missed opportunity Not really frequently injured, but if I do injure myself, it's because of idiocy. Personal favourites: (1) Too lazy to get out the ironing board. Decided to iron a shirt on the bed really quick. Plugged the iron in. Started ironing. Rearranged shirt. Tipped iron over. Iron lands on arm. The mark is still visible five months later. (2) Tried to cut a block of frozen meat. Stabbed my hand. I do things like this more than I’d like to admit Link to post Share on other sites
LegolasAroAce Posted May 30, 2020 Share Posted May 30, 2020 This may be the most relatable thread I've seen seen so far. I do have a genetic disorder that makes it easier to accidentally injure myself but some are rediculous. My favs are cutting my hand badly on the edge of a spoon handle while scooping icecream, dislocating my knee twice while just walking in my house, and slipping on wet paint on my basement stairs, causing me to rocket down the stairs and leave a trail of paint in my wake. I've been called Eugene from Hey Arnold more times than I would like. lol But I do hope your ankle gets better. Link to post Share on other sites
EbyScoots Posted May 30, 2020 Share Posted May 30, 2020 OH I am absolutely in this club. I gave myself a concussion trying to grab a pencil off of a lofted bed. Not to mention the time someone spooked me and I jumped and accidentally stabbed myself with an Xacto blade in the processes. There was one time I was carving a linoleum tile and accidentally, nearly, took my left finger off when the carving knife slipped. So I completely understand. I hope your ankle gets better! That's the worst thing ever because of how hard it is to walk after that. Best of luck! ❤️ Link to post Share on other sites
Homer Posted May 30, 2020 Share Posted May 30, 2020 I forgot another one! Sliced my hand open on a bog roll holder. That was interesting because I had no clue where the blood came from. Didn't feel a thing. The amount of times I rolled over my ankle, I already should have shredded every tendon and ligament there is, but nah... Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted May 30, 2020 Share Posted May 30, 2020 19 minutes ago, Homer said: The amount of times I rolled over my ankle, I already should have shredded every tendon and ligament there is, but nah... I've actually torn everything in one foot by tripping over a stone step the size of this quote box. And the other while helping one of my older sisters move out of an apartment. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted May 30, 2020 Share Posted May 30, 2020 Clumsy as hell, but I have spared myself serious injury. *knocks on wood* Mind you, I got a concussion, teaching a 4 year old nephew to skate. I tripped over them rapidly zigging, when I zagged (it was either put myself off balance, or stay on course and hit them full force). I fell backwards, and smacked my head on the ice. With kids all around last thing I want to do is traumatize any by showing any sign of injury (I heard a few gasps, and "Are you okay?!" from them). So I quickly got up and smiled indicating I was perfectly fine (bad move), and could feel my feet were like jello along with my knees. I made an excuse that I was out of breath, as I tried to collect myself. Luckily no blood anywhere. Scar the kids for life, if so O_o Link to post Share on other sites
Phantasmal Fingers Posted May 30, 2020 Share Posted May 30, 2020 I have broken my nose in a cycling accident. Entirely my fault as I tried to tap a quick release lever on the front wheel back into position with my foot without stopping and ended up going straight over the handlebars and nutting the road instead. I willed myself not to black out. Luckily, the car behind me stopped just in time. On another occasion I hit the kerb whilst not paying attention coming too fast off a roundabout, hit my head on the pavement, dragged one cheek along it for some distance, and ended up with a badly cut face. I had to have stitches in hospital but some of the gravel is still in the healed up wound. Consequently, sometimes it looks like I have a black eye. I have also snapped each of my collar bones in two in two other separate cycling accidents. Definitely not recommended! 😕 On one occasion it was not my fault- I sued the driver of the car I crashed into. He had pulled out in front of me and I couldn't stop. I won £5k damages and £4k for loss of earnings as I had to have a metal plate inserted in my collar bone and was incapacitated for some time. On the other occasion I was drunk, so it was entirely my fault. In fact, I was so drunk I got back on my bike and cycled another 2 miles home without noticing anything was amiss. It was only when I'd got home and opened my rollover garage door that I realised I'd snapped another clavicle in two. So, after putting my bike away, I went up to my flat and had an extremely large scotch and phoned a taxi to take me to hospital. On another occasion I rode into a car (it was my fault but it was only a 2CV!) I went flying over the handlebars and remained uninjured, though the bike was badly damaged. The first time I rode into a car that pulled out in front of me I couldn't stop in time and so went over the handlebars and hit the windscreen - which partly broke - face first. I broke my glasses but remained other wise uninjured. The bike was wrecked though. The woman driver got out of the car and asked me if I was alright. I was not and launched into a sustained verbal tirade and told her she was a stupid f*cking bitch etc, etc. She then burst into tears and was comforted by other motorists who had stopoed. I was not comforted by anyone. I sat on the side of the road by myself with my bloodied face and took myself to hospital when I'd recovered. Should've sued but didn't On two separate occasions I have been hit by cars while cycling and remained uninjured! On the second occasion the driver of the car was drunk and didn't want me to report the accident. I said I wouldn't so he gave me a lift home (drunk) and paid for a new bike. Cycling is a dangerous business. 🤕 I have stopped and taken up hiking instead. So far, so good! 🙂 Link to post Share on other sites
Skycaptain Posted May 30, 2020 Share Posted May 30, 2020 Knocking myself out running down stairs was original. Stair 3 I could jump off and land on the floor, stair 4 as I discovered, meant headbutting the ceiling. The day my attempt at closing a window at school resulted in my putting a hand through the glass, trip to A&E for stitches. On arriving home I go out for a bike ride, forget about a 90° corner, and hit the fence at around 40Kmh, and landed on the other side. Back into A&E less than four hours later Link to post Share on other sites
Alejandrogynous Posted May 30, 2020 Share Posted May 30, 2020 I manage to be very clumsy but also good at recovering so I haven't had many serious injuries (knock on wood). Mostly I'm just that idiot that'll trip/hit/knock into something for no good reason, flail for a moment, and continue on with whatever I was doing. My worst injuries have been pretty nonsensical, I once sprained my wrist opening a window, and the two worst times I've thrown my back out were from picking up an empty duffel bag off the floor, and playing scrabble. I leaned forward to put my tiles on the board and did not go back again. The word I was playing? "FAIL." Link to post Share on other sites
Rare Aztec Whstling Chickn Posted May 30, 2020 Share Posted May 30, 2020 I've once taken out a fingernail with an angle grinder. Another time, I'd just moved into a place, and since we didn't have power, it was dark. I for some reason decided to move a table that was upside down and had some other tings on it, and managed to ram it into my foot. I didn't realise it for about half an hour, but that knocked off a whole large toenail. When I was 3 or 4, while we were at a church, I was going around balancing on the edge of a step that went around the stage. Got to the end, turned around and managed to hit my head on the corner of a cabinet and cut my head open. Link to post Share on other sites
MoonDancer Posted May 31, 2020 Share Posted May 31, 2020 Luckily I'm not too injury prone (that's my sister), but I once got a black eye from a gnat. It was really sad to have to explain to people that my shiner came from something so small I didn't even see it. Thankfully it wasn't too dark, and makeup and glasses disguised it pretty well. If you are wondering, a gnat bit the edge of my eyelid, and I woke up with a massively swollen eye. I had to get steroid eye drops because it itched so bad, and once it deflated I had a bruise. I have gotten a few other bruises from gnat bites, but that was the most memorable. Link to post Share on other sites
scarletlatitude Posted May 31, 2020 Author Share Posted May 31, 2020 On 5/30/2020 at 10:28 AM, Homer said: Should've called this "Clums Club". Missed opportunity I'm not as creative as you. I'm glad to know it's not just me! A list of injuries I have sustained to date: - Cut my thumb with a plastic butter knife - Dislocated my knee cap by falling backward over a dishwasher door - Sprained my ankle (the same one, but this was the first time) when our family dog decided he also needed to go down the stairs at the same time as me - Cut open my knee really deep (stitches required) by falling on a pointy rock - Sprained my thumb by falling over during yoga - Black eye when someone kicked me while playing soccer - Put a staple through my thumb (young and stupid... it was a regular desk stapler) - Broke my arm with the bones nearly coming out of the skin, from falling on it while running on wet grass Link to post Share on other sites
Skycaptain Posted June 1, 2020 Share Posted June 1, 2020 Yesterday's great entry was to draw blood from my finger with the cat grooming comb Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted June 1, 2020 Share Posted June 1, 2020 My hands get cuts, scrapes, blisters and burns regularly with hobby work, yet I never learn to wear gloves. I got a half-dozen blisters on my left hand recently while cutting the secondaries out of an old constant-voltage transformer and kept going until I had busted open all but one. I treated the busted ones with Polysporin and bandaged them for a couple of days; they're healing much more nicely than the one that remained intact. I also smacked my right thumb with a 20 oz. rip hammer a few weeks ago; that made for a small bruise under the nail that's almost grown out. One time I was fiddling around under the living room rad trying to find a lost TV alignment tool and found a piece of CRT glass instead, putting a nice slice into the second-smallest finger on my left hand. I've necked and then busted up many knackered CRTs for disposal but that's the only significant cut I got from doing that. Must have been a piece from the 25VFAP22 I removed from that thrashed Sylvania console. Link to post Share on other sites
J. van Deijck Posted June 1, 2020 Share Posted June 1, 2020 I'm also one of those who constantly bump on things. I'm permanently covered in bruises and I can't even count anymore how many times I hit the bed or the wall with my toe. 😂 sometimes it's purely my own fault, though. Thankfully I have never broken a bone, but I had my joints damaged in accidents, too. I'm careful with knives as I can, but I frequently burn myself with the soldering tool at work. 🤷♀️ Oh and I often end up biting my cheek from the inside when I eat. Nothing's more annoying than this, probably Link to post Share on other sites
AceAnimeFan Posted June 1, 2020 Share Posted June 1, 2020 I regularly get burns and cuts while cooking and I had frequent shin splints and joint pain when I was a dancer. I once hit my head on a door frame just walking into a room and have closed my car door on my head or leg a few times. I trip over my cat, and my own feet, surprisingly often. My injuries aren't as spectacular as some of the other ones in this thread, and are more annoying than detrimental to my health, thankfully, though the cooking related ones are fairly frequent. Link to post Share on other sites
scarletlatitude Posted June 3, 2020 Author Share Posted June 3, 2020 On 6/1/2020 at 2:58 PM, AceAnimeFan said: I trip over my cat, My cat also likes to perform zoomies over my bed at night. Claws right into my legs. >.< Link to post Share on other sites
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