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Lesbian ace? Aroace? Idk please help


Potatoo

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Heya ace folks,

 

so I've been rethinking my romantic orientation and I figured you would be the best help. So I'm 100% ace and I've always thought I'm also aro, because I can't imagine dating a guy (I cringe so hard just thinking about it) though the idea of dating a girl seems kind of nice, even though I've never had a crush on anyone. I find guys more aesthetically pleasing, but I really don't wanna date them for sure. Girls on the other hand, I like the thought of dating them, I just can't find feelings for one. I also listen to girl in red and her songs are just beautiful, which is not something I've ever said about straight love songs (I normally just avoid them, cause they seem so cringe). So I think I could be a little lesbian if there's something like that? Or I'm just overthinking aro.

 

Anyways, thanks for reading and feel free to write about your experience if you struggle with the same thing.

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I can relate to this so much. I like the thought of dating girls, but it just isn't that way in real life (I've never had a crush on anyone) which is why I say I'm aroace, but on the other hand, I can't really deny that part of me either. 

 

I'm kind of struggling with the same thing, so I don't think I can be of much help, sadly.

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DarkStormyKnight

I'm in a similar boat being a gray-romantic but wanting to date women. If you aren't drawn to being a lesbian ace, maybe ID'ing as an oriented aroace would be helpful? Basically it's a term for aros who want to form partnerships with a specific gender. From the brief description it seems like that might fit, but I'd encourage you to look into it yourself. :) 

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everywhere and nowhere

A bit similar for me too. I may have crushes - sometimes... - but it's as if I effectively didn't, because I'm anyway unable to make the next step. I have low social skills, zero relationship experience, have arrived at an age when zero relationship experience is considered extremely odd... and I just don't know how does one form a relationship.

Which is why, while still declaring that I could only be in a relationship with a woman, that I can accept being perceived as a lesbian, but couldn't accept being perceived as heterosexual - I mostly no longer identify as "asexual lesbian" because the romantic aspect is just theoretic, my feelings never lead to anything more.

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  • 3 weeks later...
On 5/21/2020 at 10:51 AM, Potatoo said:

Heya ace folks,

 

so I've been rethinking my romantic orientation and I figured you would be the best help. So I'm 100% ace and I've always thought I'm also aro, because I can't imagine dating a guy (I cringe so hard just thinking about it) though the idea of dating a girl seems kind of nice, even though I've never had a crush on anyone. I find guys more aesthetically pleasing, but I really don't wanna date them for sure. Girls on the other hand, I like the thought of dating them, I just can't find feelings for one. I also listen to girl in red and her songs are just beautiful, which is not something I've ever said about straight love songs (I normally just avoid them, cause they seem so cringe). So I think I could be a little lesbian if there's something like that? Or I'm just overthinking aro.

 

Anyways, thanks for reading and feel free to write about your experience if you struggle with the same thing.

Cupioromantic lesbian ace probably 

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