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Feeling like a bummer


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I just feel very annoyed lately because of how my friend group is and how my asexuality affects me fitting in. One of my friends might be ace and his friendship in the group is great. But everyone else... They're very sexual. One constantly talks about hookups and kinks and whatever else. And the other has a boyfriend and they actively have sex and she's constantly talking about her sex life and what not. And I just... Don't care. I hit limits in the conversations about how horny they are quickly and they all know I'm ace but when express that I don't have interest in hearing it I feel like they just baby me. I'm having a harder time wanting to be around them because it will always be a conversation topic. I've gone on trips with them where it's just a place they can hook up with their partners. I feel like they care less about friendship or me at all when they do this. Idk. They'll never understand my feelings so they don't think about how they affect me. I'm tired. 

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NorthCircleTraveller

I totally get what you're saying! It's very annoying and can feel like you're trapped in this conversation circle.

They shouldn't make a big deal out of you not wanting to hear these topics. It's not a friendly attitude.

They might understand later with time or not. Prioritize yourself for now and take care!

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Damn! My Life. 

Seconded on ☝ but also, do believe you deserve friends that are more aligned with your thoughts etc. Sometimes they're not doing it on purpose, but it just happens naturally.

My irl are kinda like this - 2 are in ltrs and it's me and the other fistbumping ... Used to staying silent here and sipping my drink quietly when those topics arise. They know how I am so it should be ok. Eventually there may be the "what do you think about it Hanas ??", I share if I can say something insightful or otherwise say the drink should be colder, we laugh it off and life goes on. Not much you can do about it. 

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PeanutButterSalad

This hits very close home.

This one bit about yesterdays convo with my friend.

I was telling her about me scooting over to my boyfriends side of the bed after he got up because I can feel his scent and feel his warm loving embrace.

She said she does the same. I asked her "How? You..do not have a boyfriend, or is there something I do not know about?" and she replied "It is their pheromones and they get you going, see, you cannot deny your sexual instincts"

 

but..... but...

 

I am over here thinking about gentle huggiewuggies and she be here talkin about goddamn "me smell, me go hunt sex, ooga booga".

Goddammit.

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