Dating Site Master List

[StarryNightAllAlone]

4 minutes ago, Purple Wanderer said:

Stupid question time - Sure this has been asked somewhere...  But on asexual Cupid - how do you message matches? I assumed once matched you didnt need to subscribe!

I suppose you could give people your social media or link them in your bio.

[imnotafreakofnature!]

It's tough enough trying to find someone compatible when you're Ace, but when you're also an INFJ (rarest personality type in the world, according to Myers Briggs), AND a politically conservative Jew to boot, it becomes impossible. But after two marriages and several other failed relationships (that disintegrated because of my lack of interest in sex before I discovered asexuality), I finally realized that there are worse things than being lonely alone - and being lonely with somebody else is one of them.

 

We may all have different standards and expectations than the norm, but that doesn’t mean we should settle for less than what we want just because that's all someone is willing to offer us.

[JadeBat]

On 8/22/2022 at 4:44 PM, Purple Wanderer said:

Stupid question time - Sure this has been asked somewhere...  But on asexual Cupid - how do you message matches? I assumed once matched you didnt need to subscribe!

 

On 8/13/2022 at 10:01 PM, Ace card said:

I would say that I've tried one of these out which is asexual cupid, but it says you have to pay to text people which weird in it self. I thought that you get a chance to do that for free and stuff. Does any one else think that's weird or is it just me ?

I think it's really annoying there isn't a free messaging option once you match. I've given up on Asexual Cupid as I get a match in a blue moon and can't even message them

[Ace card]

To be honest with you, the website is great to meet other asexual people but the fact that you have to pay for just messaging is stupid. Like what's the point in meeting ace people but you can't text them at all without paying. This makes it hard to meet ace people and find a relationship at all.    

[JadeBat]

Has anyone tried Hinge since they added the sexuality feature? 

https://www.reddit.com/r/asexuality/comments/vzimf0/hinge_lets_you_pick_asexuality/

[Guest]

What's the current state of asexual dating? Is there a site that lets you message without having to pay and isn't sketchy in terms of data management?

 

I don't have much faith in dating apps for all orientations that don't let you filter. I won't be compatible with someone who is sexually attracted to me because it just makes me uncomfortable...

[SnowTurtle]

On 9/13/2022 at 7:55 PM, JadeBat said:

Has anyone tried Hinge since they added the sexuality feature? 

https://www.reddit.com/r/asexuality/comments/vzimf0/hinge_lets_you_pick_asexuality/

I haven't used Hinge yet (though I plan to in the future), but I've heard from non-Aces that Hinge does a better job at filtering than OkCupid. Hopefully this applies to aces as well.

[Iggsy81]

Well, i've used a few recently so can provide some feedback.

 

Ace-book - totally free, has been around a long time, not a great userbase and like most Ace dating sites very few new users but you might get lucky if you find someone near you or dont mind an LDR.

 

Asexualitic - recently became a paysite but only charges about $20 or so for a lifetime membership.  Again, just not enough users imho to justify the price, most ppl on this site havent logged in for ages.

 

Asexuals.net - actually a good price at only a few bucks per month so prolly worth paying for one month at least and seeing how you go.  Same problem with lack of userbase as above.

 

Asexualcupid - really expensive, i wasnt willing to fork out but it didnt seem promising to me.

 

OkCupid - this site has somehow become incredibly scammy, nearly every single like i had is someone in Kenya OR they are ppl listed in my country (Australia) but who openly say they are not in said country.  I think this site has massive problems now and i can't recommend it to anyone since the Match Group purchased it and turned it into whatever the heck it is now, bit of a shame.  Purchased one month membership and had huge buyer's remorse immediately, also really expensive.

 

So those are the ones ive tried recently, Bumble and Hinge will be next on my to try list. 

 

I want to say to anyone without hope, i met a lovely lady many moons ago on Asexualitic and we got married and were together for eight years so it CAN happen, but you might have to be willing to look a little outside your immediate state or country unfortunately.

 

 

[AmIAlone]

Can  anyone recommend any dating apps/sites?

 

I'm a straight male, looking for a relationship, albeit I have little to no interest in sex

 

I'd love to do the "normal" "couple" things... watching movies on the couch, days out, nights in etc... I'm just not bothered about the sex side of things, not sure if anyone can relate? 

 

Seems to be hard to find the right place to meet someone 

 

Any advice welcome!

[Feds the Freds]

okcupid and asexualcupid

 

both free, but sadly with some limitations

 

Good luck! And 🍰

[Eutierria]

https://discord.gg/acedatespace

 

 

[AsexyMe]

You can give a shot in the Subreddit r/asexualdating. 

[Purple Wanderer]

Most are sadly ghost towns though...

[cato]

I saw a guy on Hinge one time who stated in his prompt that he was asexual.  I would have matched with him, but he didn't want kids 🤷‍♀️

 

I would not recommend a sex-averse girl to use traditional LTR dating apps (Hinge and Bumble), since asexual guys are much rarer than women, and a lot of guys don't read profiles.  An asexual guy, though?  Eh, worth a shot.  I think in general women tend to read profiles more closely and are more likely to have low sex drive or be asexual themselves (or just not mind).  I think it'll be hard for an asexual guy to match in terms of numbers because it's harder for guys to match in general and many women won't be ok with asexuality.  However, I'd feel more confident about the compatibility of those who you do match with,  vs. matches achieved by an asexual girl.

 

I use Hinge and Bumble and don't advertise my asexuality, but I'm also not sex-repulsed.  I'm happy to engage if there's an emotional connection.

[StarryNightAllAlone]

 

[StuffedWithFluff]

I’m a woman, having the same issue people don’t read the profiles. I’ve been on lgbtq dating sites and sites for men and women to meet. Doesn’t matter the gender they never seem to read the profile I was asked by a lady and her husband for a three way. And if i do some how get the person to reply after saying hello it always ends after a day or Two 🤷‍♀️ I’d be to afraid to post myself on that Reddit asexual dating page it was hard enough putting my face in a dating site. Don’t have any advice really but I do understand 100 percent 

[sea83]

I was just about to post this question. I'm late 30s, female and ace.  I still want a romantic relationship, normal couple things sans the sexual side of it.  I don't even know where to begin.   

[LeChat]

@AmIAlone (Below is an official, green, mod message.)

 

Hello. Welcome to AVEN! I'm just letting you know I've merged your thread in the Asexual Relationships forum to AVEN's main, dating site thread list in the Asexual Relationships forum.

 

I hope this helps!

 

LeChat,

Welcome Lounge, Announcements, and Alternate Language moderator

[SylviaDragon]

Oof. recently decided to check out the online dating scene again since i heard its become more ace friendly. i tried it out maybe 7 or so years ago and found that while the sites were good and easy to navigate, they had no real options for ace people. now it seems to have flip-flopped. there are options to label yourself as ace, but everything that used to be free now costs money. what to see their picture? pay. want to send a message? pay. want to narrow your search? see your likes? get ace results only? pay!

some sites have better ace options than others, but if you are not going to one of the tiny made-for- ace-people sites, you still have to filter out a lot of incompatible people. Its kind of frustrating that we have so many tiny dating sites floating around for aces. we are already fishing in a puddle as it is-  it must be hard to maintain an active user base when such a small pool gets split up.

I have tested out a lot of dating sites and so far i'd have to agree that Okcupid and Asexual Cupid are probably your best bets. largest pool of active users for sure and while their restrictions and prices are annoying, you can mostly work around them.

 

A little tip about Asexual cupid, you can write a message on someone's main page, and journal entries seem to be open to replies as well so you can use those to make first contact. (just note that they are public) to get around this issue should you want to talk more one on one, i have seen people put their email/discord on a photo they can share. (it sounds like the site may be removing info when you try to share these things through text- so using a photo seems to work better?) you can make the photo private and only send it to people you want to talk to further.

 

One major downside to Asexual cupid however is you can't tell when someone last logged in unless you pay- and dead accounts stay in the searches. I'm really kicking myself to be honest. I found someone i was really interested in and was excited to talk to them- but it looks like they made their account sometime during covid then went inactive. =/ (so i guess if any 30 year old NB people with foot pain and a love of gardening have not checked their account in a while- go check your darn messages! lol)

[JadeBat]

So far I've been using a mixture of OK Cupid, Hinge and an asexual dating discord.

 

OK Cupids has been pretty good think a pervious post puts it well

On 6/27/2021 at 10:07 PM, N.lilibet1115 said:

OkCupid - I like all the filtering options, they are very detailed and work well. I feel like its to be expected from a site that's been around for a long time. There's a lot of people on there. I've talked to people both ace's and non-aces but haven't really carried conversations on long. One of the two I'm still talking to now seems pretty responsive.

I use Hinge a little like a classfied add letting guys message me on the whole and making explicit I'm looking for fellow aces and have had a few people message me who are asexual.

 

The Asexual Date Space discord is pretty good. I really like the welcoming community.  Also like the roles you can assign. Though unfortunately in my case as someone from the UK the server is very US heavy event time wise and also members I haven't really made any romantic connections due to being able to count the number of UK people on both hands if that 😂😅 But due to the number of members and different interest channels would recommend.

 

https://discord.gg/acedatespace

 

[MinnieMouse]

8 hours ago, JadeBat said:

So far I've been using a mixture of OK Cupid, Hinge and an asexual dating discord.

 

OK Cupids has been pretty good think a pervious post puts it well

I use Hinge a little like a classfied add letting guys message me on the whole and making explicit I'm looking for fellow aces and have had a few people message me who are asexual.

 

The Asexual Date Space discord is pretty good. I really like the welcoming community.  Also like the roles you can assign. Though unfortunately in my case as someone from the UK the server is very US heavy event time wise and also members I haven't really made any romantic connections due to being able to count the number of UK people on both hands if that 😂😅 But due to the number of members and different interest channels would recommend.

 

https://discord.gg/acedatespace

 

I've also discovered that most ace dating spaces are very US heavy. Nothing strange about that, of course – it's one of the largest countries in the world. I sometimes wish I was living there, because there are obviously a lot more aces. On the other hand, I know it takes a lot of time travelling from one side of the country to another. 

[CalmOne]

Newbie here. This question has probably been asked a hundred times already, so forgive me. Still working out how this site works.

Any advice/encouragement greatly appreciated.  

[LeChat]

@CalmOne (Below is an official, green, mod message.)

 

Hello. Welcome to AVEN! 

 

I'm just letting you know I've merged your thread in the Asexual Relationships forum with AVEN's main dating site list thread, where there are dating sites listed throughout it.

 

LeChat,

Welcome Lounge, Announcements, and Alternate Language moderator

[CalmOne]

On 12/10/2022 at 7:55 PM, MinnieMouse said:

I've also discovered that most ace dating spaces are very US heavy. Nothing strange about that, of course – it's one of the largest countries in the world. I sometimes wish I was living there, because there are obviously a lot more aces. On the other hand, I know it takes a lot of time travelling from one side of the country to another. 

I'm tempted to try OKC as I've heard good things about it, generally speaking.

[NerdyBirdy]

Has anyone ever tried Taimi? Always pops up when I search for asexual dating 

[JadeBat]

4 minutes ago, NerdyBirdy said:

Has anyone ever tried Taimi? Always pops up when I search for asexual dating 

Yes I've tried it before

It's a weird one It's like a mix of social media facebooky, steaming service, with a dating app and you can't really search by sexuality and it's not very easy to fingure out

[MinnieMouse]

On 12/21/2022 at 6:52 PM, CalmOne said:

I'm tempted to try OKC as I've heard good things about it, generally speaking.

I hope it will be a positive experience for you!

[JadeBat]

Saw this and through it may be useful for those thinking about trying OkCupid

 

https://asexualagenda.wordpress.com/2017/07/26/okcupid-questions-asexual-people-might-want-to-answer-an-ace-dating-guide/

 

There's a list of questions you'd want to answer (FYI there's a rather long NSFW section)

 

Also with OKCupid recommended using desktop site and using the Questions page to search for folks who answer sexual questions in a way that's agreeable

[Astrea]

On 10/13/2022 at 10:22 AM, AmIAlone said:

Can  anyone recommend any dating apps/sites?

 

I'm a straight male, looking for a relationship, albeit I have little to no interest in sex

 

I'd love to do the "normal" "couple" things... watching movies on the couch, days out, nights in etc... I'm just not bothered about the sex side of things, not sure if anyone can relate? 

 

Seems to be hard to find the right place to meet someone 

 

Any advice welcome!

Asexual cupid is alright really. You can give quite a lot of details in your profile (though not everyone bothers) and it has some people if you are not dead set on finding someone who is geographically very close to you. I'm about in the same situation you are but I'm French which makes it kinda worse. Here the asexual community is er...( well, look up French men in their 30s on an asexual dating website and you'll understand my plight ^^) so I just reply to people in countries which are a reasonable distance as I'm lucky enough to have a job which doesn't require me to be anywhere in particular. Almost all the people I talked to / met were in London as the asexual community actually exists there so you should be able to find someone. Thankfully it's easy and quick to make the trip  (I'm seriously considering moving there because asexual visibility is progressing so slowly in France that it looks like I will be in my 80s before I find someone French to go to restaurants and concerts with me).
From my experience, meeting asexual people through date sites like this is doable, but it requires a lot of patience in most cases as you don't have a huge pool of people and asexuality takes so many different forms that finding someone who matches your level of desired intimacy is not always easy. Good luck! ^^

[Diogenese]

I just tried signing on to asexual cupid and they want a photo of ID with no text blanked out, sorry that is too much info to share to an unknown website!