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The Five Stages of Grief/Loss


RoseGoesToYale

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RoseGoesToYale

As controversial as the model is in psych circles, I think society (yes, as a whole) is going through the five stages of grief/loss regarding quarantines, lockdowns, general stoppage of social life, and coronavirus itself. Those stages are as follows:

Spoiler

Kubler-ross-grief-cycle-1-728.jpg

 

We're just finishing up the denial stage, which mostly consisted of internet joking and meme-making. It made for a pretty good way for people to avoid the weight of the situation.

 

Now the virus and quarantine memes/jokes are starting to die down, and I see people getting testy with each other, meaning we're entering the anger stage. People are getting angry in general, about everything, and now it's only a question of who we're going to take it out on. I hope we take it out on incompetent politicians and greedy employers, those who deserve, and not each other because our nerves are already frayed.

 

But what worries me is the third stage, depression. Especially for extroverts and people who lost their jobs, people are going to get depressed. Could there be an uptick in suicides? It's possible. But once we reach that stage, it's not just medical healthcare systems that are taxed. Mental healthcare systems have always been lacking in resources, and access to it can be problematic in some countries. Crisis centers would be overwhelmed with calls, people can't go see therapists right now (there's online and phone, but not every therapist knows how to do online sessions because often a great deal of psychology is being face-to-face with someone and reading their facial expression, body language, intonation etc. to determine a person's true mental state, things that can be hidden online or over the phone). Then there's the mental healthcare workers themselves. Who provides care for the carers, as it were?

 

The biggest question is... how can we get past these stages as quickly as possible and get people to reach out?

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I think we are still a long way from getting out of the denial stage.  Some churches are still gathering in person, Liberty U has its students coming back, a pro wrestling owner is planning a big gathering for some wrestling event, and people are not fully staying away from each other.  Many are still (somehow) in the "this is a hoax" phase of this.

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I'm no expert, but a willingness to live the emotions associated with your stage has a lot to do with it.

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Phantasmal Fingers

In my personal experience of grieving for the death of loved ones - parents, for instance - I would say it goes like this:-

 

1) shock 2) denial 3) despair 4) anger 5) acceptance.

 

In my observation of other people in different cultures I have lived in experiencing such things the order is subtly different. In central asia, for example, I would say it's more like this: -

 

1) anger 2) despair 3) denial 4) shock 5) acceptance.

 

What is really noticeable to me is that when I'm angry they're in shock, and vice versa.

 

And what about behaviour at funerals for example? It's varies enormously in different parts of the world. The order of play, so to speak, is obviously different in different cultures.

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Divide By Zero

From watching the news it appears that some world leaders are still in denial (not to mention any names, but they all seem to have the title of "President"). So it may be a while before things move along.

 

As someone is an extreme introvert staying at home all day doesn't bother me at all and working at home is so much more enjoyable than being in the office. Hopefully all this working from home and doing things virtually will make people realize that technology has so much potential that's not being fully harnessed (e.g. world leaders don't need to spend millions on fancy summits when they can meet virtually, companies don't need to have massive office buildings when people can work from home, etc.)

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what the face

Society consists of individuals who may be experiencing the 5 stages in differing orders.

Yes, yes and yes.

 

 

To me more difficult questions as a society are:

What do we grieve?  What have we lost?   

 

Our connectedness?

Our invulnerability?

Our sense being exceptional?

Our privilege?

 

And what do we fear may be lost?

 

Our independence?

Our egocentricity?

Our innocence?

 

thoughts?

 

 

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