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iloveanimals

Best and free places to look for a relationship?

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iloveanimals

Any ideas? Pretty please? Thanks x

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Jade Cross

I don't believe there is a systematic location where relationships just happen. I mean you have things like online dating sites and all that jazz but I don't think (I might be wrong since I don't use them so bear in mind) that even with that, there is any guarantee that you will find a partner. 

 

Sometimes people just stumbled by accident and somehow connect to form a relationship. For some that happens earlier on in life and for others later on. There isn't a fixed time in which things will happen.

 

You could try your hand at dating sites or visit a local group of any interests you have as meeting people with similar interests much make changes a little better.

 

 

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iloveanimals

I'm not sure which dating sites to try to be honest. I cannot download any apps to my phone as my phone memory is literally zero and I cannot afford a new SD card at the moment.

The other dating sites I've tried are all paid memberships only 😕

 

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Vincent Marie

There should be a dating site exclusively for those on the ace/aro spec.

 

I've tried OKC and based on the amount of guys leaving greetings like "Hey, baby", I get the impression that most allos don't even bother to pay attention to the orientation you specifically list, much less take an interest of what you wrote in your profile. They only care if you look hot. It pisses me off because I feel completely ignored in more ways than one.

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Philip027
Quote

There should be a dating site exclusively for those on the ace/aro spec.

Technically speaking, there is (at least for aces; not sure why supposedly "aromantic" people would use a dating site).

 

It's not very populated.

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Float On

It feels so difficult to be an ace and have a prospect of meeting someone. I'd almost marry the first ace I meet IRL just because I don't think I'll have a second chance if the first isn't good.....

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nutterwithasolderingiron

yeah. what i've found on dating apps is being ace is considered a turn off or an argumentative point for many people. tbh i don't have much going for me anyway so i dont expect much. 

 

as for dating apps. most have their strengths and weaknesses.

 

ok cupid is the best all around but honestly i think a lot of people forget they even have it. 

bumble is cool in principal but yet again, i think most people download it and make an account thinking "oh what a novel idea" and forget about it

POF is just plain bad. avoid if you can help it

match.com is basically a giant paywall

badoo is just desperate folk

tinder is the one i find myself coming back to because it's got the largest install base and the user experience is ok. just be careful. 

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SithEmpress

I've mostly heard OkC and Tinder. But the former has problems with ace folk and the latter is dominated by hookup culture. 

 

Otherwise... A park? Work? AVEN meet-ups? (Please don't turn meet-ups into dating events, just use them to meet up.)

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Sinking_In

In my opinion, Tinder is mostly a waste of time. Most people put no information on their profile, and if you don't pay, you don't see who "likes" you. You can blindly wipe away at profiles that look similar to those blurry likes, and you might get lucky with a match, but once you do match, don't expect that person to reply or even meet up unless it's for a hook-up.

I've met more people on OKCupid, and their sexual orientation identifiers are pretty detailed. @Vincent Marie has a good point, it seems very few people actually look at anything other than the photos and swipe, but I think it's far worse on Tinder. I have to ask every "match" to actually read my profile, and when they do, I'm unmatched. It's annoying. I find those I've connected with on OKCupid did initially read my profile.

My friends have been raving about HINGE. I have not tried it, but one met his fiance there, and the other has gotten many dates. It also appears to be the cheapest of the 3, just $30USD for 6 mos.

 

Best of luck!

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KrysLost

what about no dating sites and make friends at asexual meetups instead? Or just let something naturally happen?

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hypnopompic
8 hours ago, Vincent Marie said:

I've tried OKC and based on the amount of guys leaving greetings like "Hey, baby", I get the impression that most allos don't even bother to pay attention to the orientation you specifically list, much less take an interest of what you wrote in your profile.

This! A friend of mine called me the other day telling me about a dating website that had "asexual" as an option when choosing your sexual orientation. She immediatley thought of me and send me a link. Now I'm not interested in those websites at all but because I love my friend and she was really excited (for me to meet soneome that way) I ended up creating a profile. I clearly indicated that I was only interested in either friendships or long-term relationships. I did not tick the boxes saying "friends with benefits" or "one-night stands" or "casual dating" and yet, this app kept matching me with men and women having ticked exactly those boxes. I think that the app matched people based on their personality and on their yes/no answers to around 20 questions but didn't take into account what you are looking for. I kept the app for 4 days but I was so frustrated because I kept getting matched with people wanting to hook up. In the end, my friend and I agreed that the website probably included "asexual" just to appear inclusive or tolerant but they clearly didn't know what asexual actually means.

 

Edit: I think the name of the app was "OkCupid" but I'm not sure.

Edited by hypnopompic

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Perspektiv

I honestly don't think there is a "better" dating website out there. It really boils down to what you're looking for, and being wise enough to know what to avoid. That will determine your experience there, in my opinion.

 

From my experience, eharmony was a website I had the best experience on (however its paid, but they often have free signups, so is worth waiting for it). Only website I've tried that every single person I met, I was highly compatible with. Doesn't mean there will be chemistry, but it was uncanny at how they had managed to set me up with people that complimented my personality and character. Worth paying for? I'd say yes, but in a very low cost introductory way (or periodically checking for their "free week trials" vs a long term expensive deal.

 

Every relationship I have been in however including my current one, I found my significant other when I had stopped looking. Hate to sound cliche, but the harder you look, the harder it will be to find.

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