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Aegosexuality Info?


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Hello again. I am brand new, I did introduce myself in the forum for that, but just in case, for people who don't check there. I just discovered all of this a little less than 24 hours ago and my mind has been blown. This means research is needed. Of course. Still trying to figure myself out in relation to this, but glad I'm not alone like I've thought forever. 

 

Anyway. Are there any resources that are really good for researching Aegosexuality? I just came across a list of various types of greysexuality, and this is one that popped up, but there was only a little information. From what I saw, this is pretty close to myself. Again, new to this and don't know where I fit in exactly. I know all of this is me now that I have read up a little bit about it, but I think my research for my exact fitting is going to take a while. 

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everywhere and nowhere

First, it should be spelled "anegosexuality". I wish sites stopped perpetuating wrong spelling. I very much dislike linguistic incorrectness.

Second... I rather disagree with the most common view on anegosexuality, that is, I don't necessarily consider it "a form of asexuality". It describes a specific aspect of a person's sexuality, however I see no reason for it to be totally exclusive to asexuals. Yes, probably a bunch of libidoist asexuals is anegosexual as well, in contrast to relatively few allosexuals. As far as I know, some allosexuals are genuinely surprised that "there is such a thing" as fantasising in third person, but it still doesn't indicate that non-asexuals never do it. I think they do, and a bit of a proof can be seen in popularity if lesbian (or, rather, "lesbian") porn among straight men.

However, I don't see why should anegosexuality be "a type of graysexuality" (I prefer spelling this word with an "a", also due to my hostility to a certain series of novels in which the protagonist is named Christian Grey :angry:). An anegosexual person may be "graysexual", may be completely asexual, may probably also not be asexual at all... To me considering anegosexuality "graysexual" seems to hide an assumption that if someone has a libido and sexual thoughts, they can't be "fully asexual". But if such a person still never wants to personally have sex, what's "graysexual" about it?

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1 hour ago, Nowhere Girl said:

(I prefer spelling this word with an "a", also due to my hostility to a certain series of novels in which the protagonist is named Christian Grey :angry:). An anegosexual person may be "graysexual"

I used the e because I refuse to spell shit like an American. Also I watch too much British "tele".

 

 

Is any of this relevant. Nope.

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If this is what I think it is, I agree with Nowhere Girl in that I few it as a form of sexuality that is neither limited to sexuals or asexuals. (As in, if this is enjoying and being turned on by watching porn or consuming sexual material that does not involve oneself.) Theres porn designed to appeal to those who like to imagine themselves involved in the act, and there's porn designed to not involve the viewer at all. 

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letusdeleteouraccounts

I recently made a post about this on another topic but I believe autochorissexual (which is another label for it) is solely an asexual identity. It’s traditionally defined as a disconnect with the target of arousal, that disconnect being a non-existing desire for sexual intimacy (no sexual attraction). The word was created to only include asexuals and consider asexuals with a difference experience from what’s expected of us. What some non-asexuals seem to relate to is the product of autochorissexuality, having fantasies that you’re absent from. Yes, they can have those fantasies but that wouldn’t make them autochorissexual

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As much as I sometimes get frustrated with the endless labels and the surrounding arguments... this really does fit me, and it's one thing that (at least at first) really seemed to separate me from the asexuals and sexuals I'd previously encountered. 
I have watched porn (although it's generally WAY too genital obsessed for me), and I also might watch an action movie.  I sure as hell don't want to be a gun-toting "action hero" who could single-handed support the ammunition industry, but I could potentially watch and enjoy it anyway.  I don't see myself as the action hero, or as any of the participants in the porn (I'm so not anything like the guys in either case.)  
Fantasies can be hard to define, sometimes not necessarily bound by logic, reality or consistency.  
"may involve sexual fantasies or arousal in response to erotica or pornography, but lacking any desire to be a participant in the sexual activities therein."

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Anthracite_Impreza
11 hours ago, CBC said:

I thought it was spelt 'telly'.

✔️

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Anthracite_Impreza
5 minutes ago, KrysLost said:

WELL, if you ask me, tele is a better spelling. 

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Anthracite_Impreza
12 minutes ago, KrysLost said:

Did I ask for your sass, young m a n?

🚾

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Can we get this thread back on topic, please. Skycaptain covering moderator QAA

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It has been brought up before, but when I found out about it, it was called 'autochorisexual' so you might have some luck looking for that word as well. It describes me very well, and a good help before was sure if I 'counted' as being ace or not. I have since decided that I am ace enough for all practical purposes, and the autochori/aego/anego/fucking-make-up-your-minds-on-this-goddamned-microlabel parts are details that, a lot of the time, are a little TMI to explain. I do consider it a specific sub-category of asexuality, but well, I am not a scholar. I don't have any resource advice. I found a random tumblr post about it and went "hey, that's me! That's the box I belong in" and then I came here, basically.

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1 hour ago, CBC said:

Yeah there was a whole thread about that aspect of the label last year. I very much agree that it seems TMI-ish.

And in my opinion, unneccessary. Most people (don't care)/(prefer not) to know whether you do porn or not. In the end, it is the potential of having sex if they were into you to begin with that they want to know.

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@CBC and @R_1 yes, most people really don't need to know, which is why I don't use that term out in the wild. See I will still defend discussion and use of terms like autochori/aego in places like this, where confusion about our feelings is a common issue and details about how we feel about sex and not is relevant. My struggle has been mostly internal. I was under the impression that I just faulty. Full of buggy software. And I did not think I fit under 'asexual' at first because the type of asexual I found described was very different from my experience. I did not click for me that maybe it is ok for me to be like this until I found something that actually described what I felt and understood that's 'a thing'. It might seem like completely unnecessary information for you guys, but to me, it was very valuable information to find. And it might be also, for people who are similar to me.

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