Guest Posted January 30, 2020 Share Posted January 30, 2020 32 minutes ago, Stevemart said: Why an asexual doesn’t think like that ..? Asexuals have no interest in connecting sexually with other people for pleasure, even if they find other people attractive. Link to post Share on other sites
AceMissBehaving Posted January 30, 2020 Share Posted January 30, 2020 8 hours ago, Stevemart said: Why an asexual doesn’t think like that ..? Because we don’t want to have sex with another person. That drive isn’t there. There is no “next step”. No matter how much we might find a person “hot” there is zero desire for any kind of follow through. Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted January 30, 2020 Author Share Posted January 30, 2020 1 hour ago, CBC said: Random question for you, @Stevemart... have you ever felt romantic interest in anyone? Yes why Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted January 30, 2020 Author Share Posted January 30, 2020 1 minute ago, CBC said: Just curious about your experiences. The person/people for whom you had romantic feelings... did you ever have sexual thoughts about them? What do you mean sexual thoughts ? Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted January 30, 2020 Author Share Posted January 30, 2020 2 minutes ago, Stevemart said: What do you mean sexual thoughts ? If you mean I’m thinking about sex with them then no I didn’t have that ever Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted January 30, 2020 Author Share Posted January 30, 2020 7 minutes ago, CBC said: Ok. When you feel attracted to them, are there other non-sexual things you think about doing with them? No .. but I’m willing to try sex Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted January 30, 2020 Author Share Posted January 30, 2020 15 minutes ago, CBC said: 1. What makes you think those feelings were romantic if you never thought about doing anything non-sexual with these people? Do you just admire them from afar but don't want any sort of a relationship... besides possibly sex? 2. Go have some sex. That’s why i think I’m asexual because I have no fantasy Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted January 30, 2020 Author Share Posted January 30, 2020 4 minutes ago, CBC said: So you've said. Forget about the issue of fantasies. Some people are completely incapable of fantasising but still want sex. Some asexuals seem to get turned on by fantasies but never want to have actual sex. The fantasy thing is almost irrelevant. But why do you think I don’t have fantasy ? Do you think something is wrong with me Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted January 30, 2020 Author Share Posted January 30, 2020 Just now, Stevemart said: But why do you think I don’t have fantasy ? Do you think something is wrong with me Do you think ability to fantasize is genetic I mean I’m able to fantasize about getting lifted my man And that turns me on Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted January 30, 2020 Author Share Posted January 30, 2020 7 minutes ago, CBC said: ?? Link to post Share on other sites
Anthracite_Impreza Posted January 30, 2020 Share Posted January 30, 2020 I am going to be extremely blunt here @Stevemart, you keep asking the same thing over and over and are apparently not listening. You haven't addressed my concern that you have OCD at all. People are getting fed up and if you carry on you might get a warning for spamming or even be banned. Please, go to a doctor, get checked for OCD. This amount of worry about orientation is not healthy. If you ignore me again, I'm finished as well. Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted May 2, 2020 Author Share Posted May 2, 2020 On 1/29/2020 at 8:08 PM, SithEmpress said: From my short stint on Fetlife and interactions with a few kinky individuals, I have to very much agree. So ppl with fetish’s don’t want sex Link to post Share on other sites
Skycaptain Posted May 2, 2020 Share Posted May 2, 2020 1 minute ago, Stevemart said: So ppl with fetish’s don’t want sex Not always correct. For some people a fetish can be part of their sexual activities, for others it doesn't have to be the case Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted May 2, 2020 Author Share Posted May 2, 2020 1 minute ago, Skycaptain said: Not always correct. For some people a fetish can be part of their sexual activities, for others it doesn't have to be the case “For others it doesn’t have to be the case“/- what does this mean Link to post Share on other sites
Skycaptain Posted May 2, 2020 Share Posted May 2, 2020 I'm not a sexologist, so I can't give a specific answer to each and every case. Fetish can, for some people be part of sexual activity. However some people have fetishes which don't form part of their sexual activity. Sex, porn, fetish, kink can be interlinked for some people, for others they're totally independent entities. For yet more people they don't apply at all. Link to post Share on other sites
SithLord Posted May 2, 2020 Share Posted May 2, 2020 31 minutes ago, Stevemart said: So ppl with fetish’s don’t want sex Some do, some don't. Some people enjoy the fetish without needing sex to be involved. For others it's impossible to separate the fetish from sex or sexuality. Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted May 2, 2020 Author Share Posted May 2, 2020 2 minutes ago, SithEmpress said: Some do, some don't. Some people enjoy the fetish without needing sex to be involved. For others it's impossible to separate the fetish from sex or sexuality. Those who can’t separate are they born like this Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted May 2, 2020 Author Share Posted May 2, 2020 3 minutes ago, SithEmpress said: Some do, some don't. Some people enjoy the fetish without needing sex to be involved. For others it's impossible to separate the fetish from sex or sexuality. Is that why I don’t like porn Bc of my fetish which is lift and carry Link to post Share on other sites
Skycaptain Posted May 2, 2020 Share Posted May 2, 2020 @Stevemart, some people are born with innate fetishes etc. Others develop them through time Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted May 2, 2020 Author Share Posted May 2, 2020 8 minutes ago, Skycaptain said: @Stevemart, some people are born with innate fetishes etc. Others develop them through time "some people are born with innate fetishes etc" is that a guess? i hope an educated one at least.. because through my extensive research i have NOT found evidence that says humans are born with a fetish Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted May 2, 2020 Author Share Posted May 2, 2020 2 minutes ago, CBC said: If you've been doing your own research into academic literature on the matter (which is ideal, and I encourage it), what are your reasons for continuing to ask for input from a bunch of randoms on the internet? I have yet to come across any currently active members who are sexologists. Because we are a community Link to post Share on other sites
Skycaptain Posted May 2, 2020 Share Posted May 2, 2020 We are a community, but we can only speak about what we have experienced and learnt ourselves. As a community which was founded to support asexuals, it's perhaps not surprising that not everyone here has a deep knowledge about fetishes and related subjects. Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted May 3, 2020 Author Share Posted May 3, 2020 23 hours ago, CBC said: Sure, ok, but we're just a community of laypeople, not experts in sexuality, psychology and fetishes. As Sky indicated, a very large portion of the membership is asexual, and whist there's nothing automatically preventing asexuals from understanding human sexuality in a more impersonal way, and whilst some of them do appear to have fetishes that don't relate to a desire for sexual interaction with other people, I imagine you can understand why the membership base may not be your best resource. As for me personally, I'm a sexual person who has no known fetishes thus far in my life, nor am I an educated expert in the field, so I -- and others here who are like me in those regards -- can't give you a whole lot more than we already have, either. That's why it's best for you to do some reading on your own and see what credible information you can find, and then also to discuss your worries and uncertainties with your therapist next time you see them. Cool story Link to post Share on other sites
Traveler40 Posted May 3, 2020 Share Posted May 3, 2020 10 hours ago, CBC said: Lolwut. Ok dude, I give up. I'm not going to interact with you anymore, fwiw. I think you're bullshitting everyone here and playing games. Imagine that for a second: Can you see how utterly bored one must be? Then try and visualize the lack of life which might create this as a form of entertainment if that is, in fact, what is happening here. So yes, count your blessings and move on. Link to post Share on other sites
iff Posted May 3, 2020 Share Posted May 3, 2020 closing thread to prevent it getting heated. Iff, Moderator, sexual partners, friends and allies Link to post Share on other sites
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