Stevemart Posted January 30, 2020 Share Posted January 30, 2020 I feel I’m attracted to men but I do t get turned on thinking about have sex with them like yes I would want but thinking about it doesn’t turn me on... I have a fantasy about being submissive and being lifted by them and that turns me on more than thinking about sex.. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted January 30, 2020 Share Posted January 30, 2020 13 minutes ago, Stevemart said: I have a fantasy about being submissive and being lifted by them and that turns me on more than thinking about sex.. There are many different forms of sexual fantasy. Some people don't get turned on from thinking about regular sex (up the butt, blow jobs or whatever) but love to fantasize about their fetishes and get very turned on by that. That's quite common for sexual people! Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted January 30, 2020 Author Share Posted January 30, 2020 1 minute ago, Pan Ficto. (on hiatus?) said: There are many different forms of sexual fantasy. Some people don't get turned on from thinking about regular sex (up the butt, blow jobs or whatever) but love to fantasize about their fetishes and get very turned on by that. That's quite common for sexual people! How do you know it’s quite common everyone I ask seems to think otherwise Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted January 30, 2020 Share Posted January 30, 2020 5 minutes ago, Stevemart said: How do you know it’s quite common everyone I ask seems to think otherwise It's very normal for people with fetishes to get turned on by thinking about their fetishes instead of regular sex. Maybe you have only asked people who don't have real fetishes!! I know because I also can get quite turned on from thinking about my extreme fetishes if I'm in the right mood, but thinking about regular sex does nothing for me. I also was a member of the worlds largest online fetish community (called Fetlife) for years, and there are millions of sexual people on that website who all prefer to fantasize about their fetishes instear of regular sex!! Many people with fetishes can find the idea of 'normal' sex very boring and mundane! It's very common for someone with fetishes to prefer those fetishes to regular sex. Link to post Share on other sites
SithLord Posted January 30, 2020 Share Posted January 30, 2020 Just now, Pan Ficto. (on hiatus?) said: I also was a member of the worlds largest online fetish community (called Fetlife) for years, and there are millions of sexual people on that website who all prefer to fantasize about their fetishes instear of regular sex!! Many people with fetishes can find the idea of 'normal' sex very boring and mundane! It's very common for someone with fetishes to prefer those fetishes to regular sex. From my short stint on Fetlife and interactions with a few kinky individuals, I have to very much agree. Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted January 30, 2020 Author Share Posted January 30, 2020 11 minutes ago, Pan Ficto. (on hiatus?) said: It's very normal for people with fetishes to get turned on by thinking about their fetishes instead of regular sex. Maybe you have only asked people who don't have real fetishes!! I know because I also can get quite turned on from thinking about my extreme fetishes if I'm in the right mood, but thinking about regular sex does nothing for me. I also was a member of the worlds largest online fetish community (called Fetlife) for years, and there are millions of sexual people on that website who all prefer to fantasize about their fetishes instear of regular sex!! Many people with fetishes can find the idea of 'normal' sex very boring and mundane! It's very common for someone with fetishes to prefer those fetishes to regular sex. But does that mean I’m asexual? if thinking about sex doesn’t turn me on im so confused Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted January 30, 2020 Author Share Posted January 30, 2020 12 minutes ago, Pan Ficto. (on hiatus?) said: I know because I also can get quite turned on from thinking about my extreme fetishes if I'm in the right mood, but thinking about regular sex does nothing for me . But do people you find attractive turn you on or you feel a certain way .. Link to post Share on other sites
mintteaa Posted January 30, 2020 Share Posted January 30, 2020 On 1/29/2020 at 7:45 PM, Stevemart said: like yes I would want ... Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted January 30, 2020 Author Share Posted January 30, 2020 57 minutes ago, Stevemart said: But does that mean I’m asexual? if thinking about sex doesn’t turn me on im so confused ?? Link to post Share on other sites
Anthracite_Impreza Posted January 30, 2020 Share Posted January 30, 2020 I've said it before, I'll say it once more. I really think you need to look into whether you have OCD and get help for this @Stevemart. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted January 30, 2020 Share Posted January 30, 2020 1 hour ago, Stevemart said: But do people you find attractive turn you on or you feel a certain way .. No sadly. I wish I could get turned on from looking at someone I find attractive but I can't. Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted January 30, 2020 Author Share Posted January 30, 2020 2 hours ago, Pan Ficto. (on hiatus?) said: No sadly. I wish I could get turned on from looking at someone I find attractive but I can't. I don’t know if I’m asexual Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted January 30, 2020 Author Share Posted January 30, 2020 3 minutes ago, CBC said: We're aware. Very very very aware. We're not going to be able to answer that for you. Please take heed of what @Anthracite_Impreza is suggesting. CBC I don’t know your name but I’m afraid I’m asexual Bc I don’t fantasize about sex .. And thinking about it doesn’t turn me on which means I’m asexual.... right ? Link to post Share on other sites
LeChat Posted January 30, 2020 Share Posted January 30, 2020 I'm confused by your repeated questions and threads, when others have replied and tried to help you. (We're not medical experts; AVEN's Terms of Service/rules says members aren't allowed to diagnose and tell others what their orientation is; and, anyway, it's very difficult to, just based on internet posts (as each person is different, feels different things). Do you have a medical condition that we don't know about? (Some members, here, do, and they mention whether or not they might have trouble understanding others' posts). Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted January 30, 2020 Author Share Posted January 30, 2020 2 minutes ago, CBC said: ...? Well you just used my username, and my actual first name is in my profile. At any rate, I'm not sure what that has to do with anything? Some sexual people don't fantasise. Many do, some don't. And some asexual people have fantasies. That alone doesn't tell you much. No. What makes you asexual is if you have no innate desire for sexual interaction with other people. Sexual people want to have sex (doesn't have to be missionary position PiV heterosexual sex, either) with other people for the purposes of their own enjoyment, be it physical or emotional (usually a combination of both). Asexual people do not. I get sexually aroused by a men body and I guess sex would be the next logical thing to do ...? Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted January 30, 2020 Author Share Posted January 30, 2020 1 minute ago, CBC said: Um, probably if it's something you feel you actually want to do. If you just experience arousal but have no interest in actual sex though, don't have sex. I want to do it to see how it feels to be this intimate with a guy I feel attraction to but not because I know how good I’ll feel beCause I don’t have this innate sexual fantasy that turns me on ... I mainly masterbate to videos of a guy lifting another guy ... Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted January 30, 2020 Author Share Posted January 30, 2020 2 hours ago, Pan Ficto. (on hiatus?) said: No sadly. I wish I could get turned on from looking at someone I find attractive but I can't. But just being sexual Aroused by a guy I find cute is not enough to classify as sexual attraction..I need to have this innate desire to have sex which I probably Don’t I want to have it as a way of getting rid of my curiosity above anything else .. Link to post Share on other sites
mintteaa Posted January 30, 2020 Share Posted January 30, 2020 @Stevemart ... Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted January 30, 2020 Author Share Posted January 30, 2020 3 minutes ago, CBC said: Then do so, and keep an open mind. That's the only way you'll really learn. But people don’t really have to try it to know they will like it and to know they have fantasy about it Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted January 30, 2020 Share Posted January 30, 2020 37 minutes ago, Stevemart said: But just being sexual Aroused by a guy I find cute is not enough to classify as sexual attraction..I need to have this innate desire to have sex which I probably Don’t I want to have it as a way of getting rid of my curiosity above anything else .. When you said: 5 hours ago, Stevemart said: I feel I’m attracted to men but I do t get turned on thinking about have sex with them like yes I would want but thinking about it doesn't turn me on That sounded like you're saying you're attracted to men and would want sex with them too? That is a classic sexual trait, not an asexual one. Though you can of course label yourself whatever you want Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted January 30, 2020 Share Posted January 30, 2020 1 hour ago, Stevemart said: I don’t know if I’m asexual Well I'm not asexual and I don't get turned on from thinking about sex. I can get turned on from fetishes though Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted January 30, 2020 Author Share Posted January 30, 2020 4 minutes ago, Pan Ficto. (on hiatus?) said: Well I'm not asexual and I don't get turned on from thinking about sex. I can get turned on from fetishes though So you want to have sex with whom you are attracted to Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted January 30, 2020 Author Share Posted January 30, 2020 6 minutes ago, Pan Ficto. (on hiatus?) said: Well I'm not asexual and I don't get turned on from thinking about sex. I can get turned on from fetishes though 8 minutes ago, Pan Ficto. (on hiatus?) said: When you said: That sounded like you're saying you're attracted to men and would want sex with them too? That is a classic sexual trait, not an asexual one. Though you can of course label yourself whatever you want Is getting sexual aroused by guys when seeing them a classical sexual trait as well? Link to post Share on other sites
Salmiakki Posted January 30, 2020 Share Posted January 30, 2020 1 hour ago, CBC said: and my actual first name is in my profile ??? where? 😅 I can't find it Link to post Share on other sites
Salmiakki Posted January 30, 2020 Share Posted January 30, 2020 2 minutes ago, CBC said: Reveal hidden contents I can't see it for some reason? Link to post Share on other sites
Salmiakki Posted January 30, 2020 Share Posted January 30, 2020 1 minute ago, CBC said: The image I posted? Or the name thing in the profile? I can see the image, I just can't see your name in your profile. I can see all the other info though Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted January 30, 2020 Share Posted January 30, 2020 51 minutes ago, Stevemart said: Is getting sexual aroused by guys when seeing them a classical sexual trait as well? Well yes it is generally. Some asexuals do experience that, BUT an asexual never thinks 'maybe I'd like to have sex with him', no matter how aroused the asexual is!! Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted January 30, 2020 Author Share Posted January 30, 2020 50 minutes ago, Pan Ficto. (on hiatus?) said: Well yes it is generally. Some asexuals do experience that, BUT an asexual never thinks 'maybe I'd like to have sex with him', no matter how aroused the asexual is!! Why an asexual doesn’t think like that ..? Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted January 30, 2020 Author Share Posted January 30, 2020 Just now, Stevemart said: So most asexuals don’t get sexual arousal from seeing an attractive person and interacting ? Link to post Share on other sites
Stevemart Posted January 30, 2020 Author Share Posted January 30, 2020 Just now, CBC said: Because they're asexual. They don't desire partnered sexual activity. Generally not. We've confirmed all this numerous times. Generally not what ??? Link to post Share on other sites
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