upsidedownduck Posted January 23, 2020 Share Posted January 23, 2020 I'm 14 and I've been identifying as asexual since November. Somewhat recently I've also been identifying as aromantic. However, this weekend something changed. There's a girl who I previously thought I had a squish on, but now I think it might be a crush. I've heard others describe crushes in a somewhat similar way. We had an event for two days over the weekend and we spent a lot of time together. We also texted for around 3 hours after it ended. I've started thinking about her a lot and when I do I feel really good. I should mention that I'm an AMAB person who is identifying openly as male (though I'm not sure I'm entirely comfortable with that). I want to hug her and spend more time with her, but I know I'm not sexually attracted to her and I am still asexual. Is this demiromanticism? Greyromanticism? Or is this just a squish? I'd love some input. Thanks! Link to post Share on other sites
Rynn Posted January 23, 2020 Share Posted January 23, 2020 The thinking about that person a lot, wanting to hug them and spend time with them does sound like how I experience crushes, but of course I can't see into your mind to compare, so we can't know for sure haha It might just be plain old romanticism? What makes you think it is demi or gray? Link to post Share on other sites
upsidedownduck Posted January 23, 2020 Author Share Posted January 23, 2020 @Laurann This is the first time I have experienced something like this. I think I have had squishes before, but this is new. Link to post Share on other sites
Rynn Posted January 23, 2020 Share Posted January 23, 2020 @upsidedownduck That doesn't seem out of the ordinary for someone who is 14? Of course the age at which that stuff shows up differs per person, but 14 is not odd. I didn't have my first crush until I was 15, and the second one came at 19. Of course it's possible that you're demi or grayromantic, but I don't think the fact that you've never experienced a crush at 14 is necessarily an indicator of that. Link to post Share on other sites
upsidedownduck Posted January 24, 2020 Author Share Posted January 24, 2020 @Laurann I suppose that's fair. It seems that my peers have been getting them frequently for a few years now, but it does make sense that it might be later for some than others. Thanks for the input! Link to post Share on other sites
ConfusedTeen. Posted March 5, 2020 Share Posted March 5, 2020 if it seems new to all the squishes you’ve had before then it is likely it’s a crush??? (I’m not an expert at all so probably don’t quote me on that or anything ha 😅) and this next bit probably doesn’t help (but sometimes it’s nice to feel like someone else gets it?) but I relate to this, I’m also 14 and I get how confusing it can be trying to find your romantic orientation (I’m still trying to figure it out myself) and determining if it’s a squish or a crush is really confusing 👍 Link to post Share on other sites
upsidedownduck Posted March 6, 2020 Author Share Posted March 6, 2020 @ConfusedTeen.It's nice to find someone to relate to! Turns out it was a crush, but it didn't really end up working out. Oh well. Anyways, I'm going with demiromantic for now, because I don't find strangers, or even somewhat good friends, romantically attractive. It's just really close friends. I hope you figure it out! Link to post Share on other sites
ConfusedTeen. Posted March 7, 2020 Share Posted March 7, 2020 @upsidedownduckThanks, sorry it didn’t work out that sucks but I’m glad you figured it out 🤗 Link to post Share on other sites
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