Ally<3 Posted January 21, 2020 Share Posted January 21, 2020 Anyone know why we, as aces, can find people aesthetically attractive (good looking, cute, dashing), but not feel sexual attraction towards them? Are there biological reasons to think someone looks good if you’re not interested in having sex with them? I find people good looking or “cute” all the time, but I never think or fantasize about having sex with them. Maybe it has something to do with romantic attraction? Just curious what other people’s thoughts are! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
RoseGoesToYale Posted January 21, 2020 Share Posted January 21, 2020 Some scientists say it has to do with body or facial symmetry, but I don't think that tells the whole story. Take Henrik Lundqvist for example: Spoiler He's widely regarded as one of the most handsome men in ice hockey, but his features are clearly not symmetrical. I don't think science will ever find a concrete answer. I'd say there's a good degree of socialization involved. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
avapavalavacake Posted January 21, 2020 Share Posted January 21, 2020 Humans naturally gravitate to the more aesthetically pleasing variations of many things (food, faces, fashion). How much of it is biological vs. a result of socialization may be up for debate, but I'm not sure why finding humans aesthetically attractive would be innately linked to sexual attraction. Most people can generally find friends or family members or celebrities 'good looking' without it being romantic or sexual, regardless of whether they're ace. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
SithLord Posted January 21, 2020 Share Posted January 21, 2020 I think it has a lot to do with evolution. We, as a species, are designed to appreciate something's aesthetics for various reasons. Flowers and fruit have evolved to be attractive because their species relies on it to survive. Even if we don't want to reproduce with the aesthetically attractive person, we can still appreciate them. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted January 21, 2020 Share Posted January 21, 2020 They're just two separate types of attraction and it's possible to experience both, just one or neither. I've been told that sexual people aren't necessarily that interested in some of the most beautiful people out there, and that someone who is more average in appearance could have more sex appeal than someone who is perfect looking. The two sort of go together but only to an extent. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
LeChat Posted January 21, 2020 Share Posted January 21, 2020 Hi. Good questions...unfortunately, researchers who study asexuality don't seem to have come up with any answers, yet, but perhaps, with time and more research, humans might know the answer. Some aces don't experience aesthetic attraction toward others; some, like me, occasionally, experience that, once in a while, very, very rarely; and then, of course, like you mentioned, there are some aces who experience aesthetic attraction more often. That's an interesting theory of yours, about whether aces who, perhaps, experience aesthetic attraction more often might be more likely to also have a romantic orientation. It'd be interesting for research to study that, whether aromantic aces might also be more likely to not experience aesthetic attraction (or very little). Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Philip027 Posted January 21, 2020 Share Posted January 21, 2020 I don't really experience it. But I will say that these different "attractions" are only really different in the sense of what we want to do as a result of it. Those sorts of things differ for the same reasons any of our other likes/dislikes differ. It's just human variance Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Janus the Fox Posted January 21, 2020 Share Posted January 21, 2020 Looking up Aesthetics Philosophy and reading materials from that, adequately explains mine. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Anthracite_Impreza Posted January 21, 2020 Share Posted January 21, 2020 Why am I only attracted to certain machines despite it not being possible to reproduce with them? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Quote Link to post Share on other sites
AllieCat Posted January 21, 2020 Share Posted January 21, 2020 I definitely experience aesthetic attraction. That picture of the hockey player Henrik Lundqvist had my heart fluttering. But just cuz I think he's handsome, doesn't mean I want anything sexual from him. I'd love to meet him and be his friend and have him smile at me, but that's about it. At the same time, I can look at my friends and think "Wow, she's gorgeous!" but I am not interested in any sort of romantic or sexual relationship, I just think they're pretty and I'm happy for them. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Jade Cross Posted January 22, 2020 Share Posted January 22, 2020 On 1/21/2020 at 12:13 AM, RoseGoesToYale said: Some scientists say it has to do with body or facial symmetry, but I don't think that tells the whole story. Take Henrik Lundqvist for example: Reveal hidden contents He's widely regarded as one of the most handsome men in ice hockey, but his features are clearly not symmetrical. I don't think science will ever find a concrete answer. I'd say there's a good degree of socialization involved. That man's face scares my OCD brain 🤤 But I agree there is neither an ultimate scientific or social answer. Although rare, I think Ive experienced this as I can think of 3 co-workers whose presence I enjoyed. One blonde, the other two redheads. I could likely describe them in detail but somehow that makes me feel like a creep. I will say that neither of them had the social measurements (I guess is the right word?) for what is considered as attractive? They were both on the chubbier side. Not morbidly obbese but they were definately not skeleton skinny which honestly kind of scares me. It makes me think a person suffers from anorexia or something. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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