Distinction between 'aesthetic appreciation' and 'aesthetic attraction'

[Guest]

Does anyone else differentiate between a) thinking someone is aesthetically pleasing but having no attraction to them of any kind, and b) actually finding someone attractive (not necessarily in a romantic or sexual way) based on their looks?

 

It's kind of a subtle difference that I'm not sure exists. I'm just curious about what my fellow AVENites think.

[Grimalkin]

The difference definitely exists for me. It may be subtle, but I will spend a lot more time staring at a handsome guy than a handsome gal. It feels like the difference between "I like the look of that" and "I want that person to be mine somehow." (How, my silly brain doesn't know. Just mine.)

[Anthracite_Impreza]

Yes it exists. I appreciate the aesthetics of many locomotives and lorries, but am not attracted to them in the same way as say, a Mercedes C63 AMG, which is much more of a phwoar.

[Skeletonducky]

I think there's definitely a difference. You can like how something or someone looks without feeling a platonic, romantic or sexual attraction.

You can just appreciate how someone looks.  

[frostboot]

I personally struggle to understand the difference between the two, but that doesn't mean the difference doesn't exist.

I do think my friends are attractive, in a "you're a great person and perfect and beautiful" kind of way, and maybe that's different from just thinking they're aesthetically pleasing? Either way, it's nothing I care to define.

[Iam9man]

59 minutes ago, cAROlyn said:

Does anyone else differentiate between a) thinking someone is aesthetically pleasing but having no attraction to them of any kind, and b) actually finding someone attractive (not necessarily in a romantic or sexual way) based on their looks?

 

It's kind of a subtle difference that I'm not sure exists. I'm just curious about what my fellow AVENites think.

Yes, definitely!

 

Some people are aesthetically attractive (in my opinion) but I am not aesthetically or otherwise attracted to them.

[Janus the Fox]

No to little difference to me, both goes under “Aesthetic Philosophy” if not nothing more to my aesthetic attractions.

[Guest]

Thanks for all of the enlightening replies. For someone like myself, who often either notices or invents subtleties that are confusing to everyone (for examples, see my post in this thread), it's validating to hear that some other people recognize a distinction that I used to think was just a 'me thing'. (That's not to say that the distinction exists for everyone; it's up to the individual to decide for themselves.)

 

From a young age, I've been taught that a person's appearance alone isn't enough of a justification for being in any kind of relationship. That, combined with my aroaceness, prevents me from thinking someone is attractive because of how good-looking they are. I can look at someone and think they are aesthetically pleasing, but that judgment has no bearing on whether I want to be their friend or anything like that.

 

Additionally, my standards of 'good-looking' don't seem to line up with society's standards. I know what a handsome guy/pretty girl is 'supposed to' look like, but I don't normally think those people are aesthetically pleasing. In fact, the word 'handsome' makes zero sense to me.

[Philip027]

No, there isn't a difference.

 

Someone drawing your attention to the fact they are aesthetically attractive IS being aesthetically attracted.  That's literally what the "attraction" refers to; the fact they have grabbed your attention in that way.

[Guest]

32 minutes ago, Philip027 said:

Someone drawing your attention to the fact they are aesthetically attractive IS being aesthetically attracted.  That's literally what the "attraction" refers to; the fact they have grabbed your attention in that way.

Based on this definition, I see 'aesthetic appreciation' as a very weak form of aesthetic attraction, which is still accurate since I don't have a very strong sense of beauty when it comes to people, even though I find some people better-looking than others. Integrals, however, are a different story 😆

 

Would we then call 'aesthetic appreciation' gray-aesthetic attraction?

[Starbogen]

For me the difference is that when I recognize someone is aesthetically attractive but don't actually find them attractive (so what you refered to as aesthetic appreciation), I can look at them and think they look really good but I don't feel drawn to them or compelled to keep looking at them for more than that initial "whoa yeah they look good" moment.

Meanwhile when I do find someone aesthetically attractive I want to keep looking at them, if they're an actor which is usually the case I'll google them and watch movies they've been in, look at gifs, stuff like that, and when they're not on screen, I'll be actively waiting and wanting for them to show up again. 

 

So for me, simple aesthetic appreciation is kinda like very casually appreciating the beauty of a work of art even if it's not quite your prefered style, so you look at it and enjoy it but then quickly move on. Aesthetic attraction on the other includes the desire to keep experiencing the artwork because not only is it beautiful but it's also in your favourite style, or even a style you didn't know you'd like but it turned out you did, so you stay for longer and take pictures and when you leave you look at the pictures every now and then because the art was amazing and really made you feel something. 

[BeakLove]

I don't think distantly being able to recognise something is beautiful is the same thing as being attracted. I think appreciation is almost an intellectual exercise: here's why one might find this thing appealing or attractive. But once you find yourself being drawn to object of beauty, then as @Philip027 says what is that but attraction?

 

Quote

noun the action or power of evoking interest in or liking for someone or something

 

[such]

I have experienced aesthetic attraction to one person (and to this day I don't know if it counts as a crush). He was not classically good looking and much older than me, so not necessarily considered typically attractive. But there was something about the way he looked (including the way he walked, his  height and posture, his mannerisms) that made my eyes want to follow him around the room. I also really enjoyed the sound of his voice. There was nothing sexual about it, nor did I want to touch him. I just wanted to be around him and stare at him all day.

 

So yes, I do think there's a difference. Aesthetic attraction is more of a visceral feeling that you get when you look at someone (that is not romantic or sexual). Aesthetic appreciation is just that, appreciating something good looking.