Students and asexuality do not compute

[Raziela]

So hello, I'm new here. 

I've known for a while now that I'm not sexually attracted to anyone (yet) but didn't think it was such a big deal.

I don't know yet if I'm demi or just ace since I've not had a 'real' relationship (12-year olds having a relationship does not count!).

I thought that it didn't matter anyway UNTIL I went to university. 

Now I have to fend off dick-pics and propositions and living with 8 other (very sexual) people on one floor and I've just about torn my hair out in the face of teasing.

Don't get me wrong, I can make jokes about sex, even if I haven't had it. The teasing itself doesn't really bother me all the time but sometimes I just need someone to get me before I flip. So here I am. 

Just for the fun of it, does anyone have any dating sites for asexual people? Because dating also seems to be a minefield and I'd honestly just like a chance at finding someone and not being alone. Friend- or relationship-wise.

[elizabeth17]

that sucks. I'm also a student in university, but in the US, and yeah it can be very frustrating. I got lucky and while none of my friends are ace (that I know of I do have a friend who is currently thinking through her sexuality) nearly all my friends are queer (idk if your friends are queer or not but if not maybe explore the queer community for friends). While there is some gatekeeping in the queer community around ace identities I haven't experienced that with my college friends. Any who if your school has any queer clubs or the place you go to school has a queer community I'd encourage you to explore that to find supportive friends or romantic relationships. I've found that queer people are more understanding of asexuality. My friends have changed their language around sex and relationships when asked to, which makes me feel more included. 

[Lichley]

Welcome! Yeah I’m in the same situation, my roommates are constantly going out to clubs to get laid, and I don’t like clubbing either, so I have to awkwardly keep turning down propositions to go partying with everyone 😞

Still, it means they kitchen is free most nights, so I can relax after a long day’s work in peace and quiet  

[kp9435283]

I’m also a student in university living in residences. It’s hard being surrounded by people who don’t understand you or can’t relate. Regardless you aren’t alone. 

[Samantha1299]

I completely understand being at school and feeling surrounded by very sexual people. It can be very isolating so I try to talk to friends and spread awareness of this community. Also reminding myself that I may feel alone when I am not. You are supported. 

[Raziela]

Exactly. Constantly turning everyone down is downright awkward and I don't even have a free kitchen most nights because they hold pre-drinks in the shared space. We even once got a warning about loud noises with a threat of expulsion because, apparently, the whole floor was involved. And I wasn't even there. 

And it's not that I never (vaguely) tried to explain my position. But the predominant reactions I get are "you haven't tried enough (partying/ parties)" or "if you drank something the partying would be more fun" or "relax". Something along those lines.