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Silence4now

When is it more than friendship

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Silence4now

I am curious about other demisexuals criteria for dating. Can anyone reading this describe their perception of the little things that spark the feelings of moving beyond friendship? I seem to have to see certain acts of kindness, patience and being open minded of course. I don't ever seem to realize that I'm developing feelings like that until they are right in my face. I keep feeling like new people, that come along and are interested in more than friendship from the start, do not understand me when i try to tell them what i need to experience before I feel that way. I feel like there is a way that I can't put into words just yet, that would help me explain this better and save others from feeling put off or rejected.

I am also wondering if anyone else feels like they are demi and sapio at the same time? I am drawn to intelligent people always and have never had feelings develop for someone that was not a long time friend at the same time either. If I am demi and sapio then is there a word to describe this?

 

                                                                                                                                                                                                   Thanks, Silence4now

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CBC

Do you need a word for it? Not trying to be rude, but that seems like a pretty common experience to me. If you want to use demi, then sure, go for it. When explaining to other people, it's probably most helpful just to say that you have a preference for certain traits (which... we all do) and need to experience friendship and connection before developing romantic/sexual interest. Not everyone has a need for an established friendship before feeling attraction and desire, sure, but many do and I think a lot of people will understand if you phrase it that way.

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rejectionwarrior
On 1/16/2020 at 3:02 AM, Silence4now said:

I am curious about other demisexuals criteria for dating. Can anyone reading this describe their perception of the little things that spark the feelings of moving beyond friendship? I seem to have to see certain acts of kindness, patience and being open minded of course. I don't ever seem to realize that I'm developing feelings like that until they are right in my face. I keep feeling like new people, that come along and are interested in more than friendship from the start, do not understand me when i try to tell them what i need to experience before I feel that way. I feel like there is a way that I can't put into words just yet, that would help me explain this better and save others from feeling put off or rejected.

I am also wondering if anyone else feels like they are demi and sapio at the same time? I am drawn to intelligent people always and have never had feelings develop for someone that was not a long time friend at the same time either. If I am demi and sapio then is there a word to describe this?

 

                                                                                                                                                                                                   Thanks, Silence4now

Hi there, I learned the terms sapiosexual, demisexual, and demiromantic about a week ago and can relate to being a bit of everything. I've read that sapiosexual isn't a real sexual orientation and I don't feel like a "true" sapiosexual either. I think I'm a demisexual / demiromantic with some tendencies of sapiosexual. Or maybe I'm just asexual / aromantic since we don't know for sure until we start developing feelings. I like having direct and honest conversations so happy to share my "dating" experiences.

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pastelsun

Hey!

 

I made the term demisapioromantic to use for myself. It's a mouthful but it describes me the best, and I think it could apply to you too.

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Silence4now
15 hours ago, pastelsun said:

Hey!

 

I made the term demisapioromantic to use for myself. It's a mouthful but it describes me the best, and I think it could apply to you too.

I like it but yes it is a tongue twister.  

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