Jump to content
Candy322

Broken Ace

Recommended Posts

Candy322

I don't feel right about sex. I don't like the way people go about it I consider it a serious intimate private act but I'm disgusted with society for many reasons. I want a relationship where sex doesn't matter as much. I just don't want to be used for my body, it leaves such an ugly feeling of emptiness and confusion. It's the worst feeling ever. I just want a loving relationship but I know nobody will take me serious at the weight I'm at. I've also prepared to be alone forever but whatever I just thought a real kiss would be nice...

Edited by Candy322
  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
TheAceAroDragon

im sure there is someone out there who is just the one for you. im aromantic asexual so i dont really get romance much but if you just keep searching for that special someone who likes you for you then im sure you would get that relation ship that you desire :D

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
oldgeeza

I guess we all don't feel right about the act of sex, sadly, society sees sex as something that "everyone" does, if the internet had been around when I was younger, I still don't think that there would have been sites like this, when I was in my teens, probably up to my mid 30's, society either saw you as gay or straight and that was it, there are dating sites for asexuals, we are slowly becoming more accepted in society, it's taken a long time though, but I certainly think that as we become more accepted in society, the more people are being honest with themselves about how they feel towards sex, I wouldn't give up hope just yet, as for your size, honestly, that counts for nothing, it's your personality that makes you not your size, the way you look, the colour of your skin, your religion or your sexuality, it's what's inside that makes the person

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Candy322
19 minutes ago, oldgeeza said:

I guess we all don't feel right about the act of sex, sadly, society sees sex as something that "everyone" does, if the internet had been around when I was younger, I still don't think that there would have been sites like this, when I was in my teens, probably up to my mid 30's, society either saw you as gay or straight and that was it, there are dating sites for asexuals, we are slowly becoming more accepted in society, it's taken a long time though, but I certainly think that as we become more accepted in society, the more people are being honest with themselves about how they feel towards sex, I wouldn't give up hope just yet, as for your size, honestly, that counts for nothing, it's your personality that makes you not your size, the way you look, the colour of your skin, your religion or your sexuality, it's what's inside that makes the person

I wish I knew what the term asexual was when I lost my virginity if I did I'd still be a virgin. I never wanted it at all. I understand what you're saying it's the inside that counts but to be realistic nobody cares about the inside and personality does not matter at all. Everybody wants what's on the surface what they can see. That's what's disheartening. Certain rules only apply to certain people.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Candy322
48 minutes ago, TheAceAroDragon said:

im sure there is someone out there who is just the one for you. im aromantic asexual so i dont really get romance much but if you just keep searching for that special someone who likes you for you then im sure you would get that relation ship that you desire :D

Eh I don't think I even want a relationship in this world anymore I lost hope sad to say. I'm just being realistic with how the world is...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Yeast

Its a shame we never met. I don't care what a person looks like. What's inside is the important thing. My problem is that I've been incredibly naive in the past. I got to know a lot of people I should have avoided. However there is no such thing as a completely bad experience. Sure, I suffered a lot but I learned a lot, too. Now I know what predators look like and can avoid them. Please don't give up hope. You alone are responsible for your own happiness.  You don't really want to be miserable, do you? My best advice is just keep trying. Its a big world out there and it gets bigger every day.  Keep seeking and you shall find what you seek.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Sithgroundhog

I think you should try and focus on how you feel and how to improve that. If you don't like your weight, or think you'll be happier at a different weight for whatever reason, you can try and fix that. If you want a relationship, try putting yourself out there through dating sites or other methods. Never give up hope and always try to focus on what you can do to improve your situation. 

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
oldgeeza
11 hours ago, Candy322 said:

I wish I knew what the term asexual was when I lost my virginity if I did I'd still be a virgin. I never wanted it at all. I understand what you're saying it's the inside that counts but to be realistic nobody cares about the inside and personality does not matter at all. Everybody wants what's on the surface what they can see. That's what's disheartening. Certain rules only apply to certain people.

I too wish I knew about asexuality when I decided to have sex, I too never wanted and ended up hating what I had done, it made me feel sick.

 

I know that not all people feel the same way, but although I am hetero and find myself attracted to women, I find myself attracted to their personalities rather than their looks, I admit that I'm a cuddle slut too, the reason for telling you this is because, I'm a short, overweight white guy, I was delivering to a store when another of our drivers turned up, the assistant manager in this particular store is a tall, larger build, black lady with a smile to die for and a wicked sense of humour, we get along so well, every time we see each other we have a cuddle, this particular day, the other driver looked at me and asked "did you just cuddle?" he looked and sounded shocked, I didn't think anything of it, when I got back to the depot, I heard that he'd commented to someone that I had cuddled a big black woman at the store, her size, colour of skin, none of it bothers me, I find attraction in her personality, she's one of the ones I really deliver to, it's the connection we have to me that makes all the difference.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Candy322
25 minutes ago, oldgeeza said:

I too wish I knew about asexuality when I decided to have sex, I too never wanted and ended up hating what I had done, it made me feel sick.

 

I know that not all people feel the same way, but although I am hetero and find myself attracted to women, I find myself attracted to their personalities rather than their looks, I admit that I'm a cuddle slut too, the reason for telling you this is because, I'm a short, overweight white guy, I was delivering to a store when another of our drivers turned up, the assistant manager in this particular store is a tall, larger build, black lady with a smile to die for and a wicked sense of humour, we get along so well, every time we see each other we have a cuddle, this particular day, the other driver looked at me and asked "did you just cuddle?" he looked and sounded shocked, I didn't think anything of it, when I got back to the depot, I heard that he'd commented to someone that I had cuddled a big black woman at the store, her size, colour of skin, none of it bothers me, I find attraction in her personality, she's one of the ones I really deliver to, it's the connection we have to me that makes all the difference.

What I read was pure Beauty. Something I wish to come across some day. It sound like you two really just enjoyed each other company. I've really long for that. Now I have a small spot of hope and I hope that it grows. I felt awful when I had sex and I just hope that I can find someone that understands. Thanks for that insight my dear🤩🤩

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Candy322
10 hours ago, Yeast said:

Its a shame we never met. I don't care what a person looks like. What's inside is the important thing. My problem is that I've been incredibly naive in the past. I got to know a lot of people I should have avoided. However there is no such thing as a completely bad experience. Sure, I suffered a lot but I learned a lot, too. Now I know what predators look like and can avoid them. Please don't give up hope. You alone are responsible for your own happiness.  You don't really want to be miserable, do you? My best advice is just keep trying. Its a big world out there and it gets bigger every day.  Keep seeking and you shall find what you seek.

🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩 Thanks this really cheered me up because I went through some trauma that put me in a bad place too due to me being naive and I don't like what happened at all but I'd be a liar if I said I didn't learn anything because I learned so much. I do wish to relocate to my dream location which is California. As I'm writing this my anxiety is at an all time high. For some reason I'm paranoid that someone has read my journal. Yet however idc they can see how Batshit crazy I am lol. Seriously though thanks I will keep hope. It always feels good to have hope for love even though that sounds cheesey.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Candy322
10 hours ago, Sithgroundhog said:

I think you should try and focus on how you feel and how to improve that. If you don't like your weight, or think you'll be happier at a different weight for whatever reason, you can try and fix that. If you want a relationship, try putting yourself out there through dating sites or other methods. Never give up hope and always try to focus on what you can do to improve your situation. 

I appreciate this I never been a steady weight I always gain and lose but I'm trying to lose for good this time. You're right I'm not giving up it's a big world and I cant let them win. I need to be happy with myself first. 

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


×
×
  • Create New...