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What do you like about being ace and/or aro?


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I made this list in a different post, but compiling it made me curious about what others would say about themselves.

 

Things I like about being aroace:

0. I get to use my extra time (that otherwise would have been spent with a partner or partners) for my many fun hobbies.

1. I don't get distracted by sexual/romantic attraction when I'm trying to do work or enjoy my life in other ways.

2. I don't have to worry about people cheating on me.

3. I'm spared the terrifying-sounding ordeal of meeting a new person to judge whether they'd be a possible significant other.

4. If someone asks me if I want to go out with them (hasn't happened and hopefully never will), I'll have a definitive reason for my 'Thanks, but no thanks'.

5. I can skip STD tests at the doctor, as well as other procedures for sexually active and potentially sexually active people.

6. None of my money goes to 'safer sex supplies'. Let the condoms expire on the shelf.

7. If people ask me about my sex life (at the doctor, in Truth or Dare, or anywhere else), I can confidently and truthfully proclaim that there's nothing to share.

8. l get to have two awesome flags in my room :)

9. My sexual orientation is the subject of an amazing number of puns. I encourage anyone who reads this to look up 'ace definition' on the Google Machine. It's a fun time.

 

[Added just now] 10. I don't have to look/smell good for people (just kidding, but perhaps true to some extent)

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mexicanpotato

Number 5 is one of my favorites

Also, having Valentine's day as a normal day and have nothing to worry about is great

 

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Luftschlosseule

If feel like that's one potential sorce for drama that doesn't apply to me. Since I am ace, aro, agender, neurodivers and disabled, I don't fit in mainstream society in any way, so that doesn't feel like it adds another layer of drama. The "urgh you're not like everybody else" is there anyways.

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SorryNotSorry

The absence of baggage.

 

Specifically, not feeling pressure to have as much sex as possible for the sake of sex, never having to worry about whether some kid is mine, no chance of getting STDs, and no confusion about decoupling sex from love.

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Anthracite_Impreza

Being ace makes my romantic orientation far less practically and ethically complicated, though that's the exact opposite to most aces.

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#5 for sure.
Also, meeting others like at Pride and other events is great...being a part of those (Aro/Ace/GRSM/LGBTQ+) communities is affirming, helpful, and fun.

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I agree not being distracted by sexual or romantic attraction. (Is a blessing and curse for males. Like I was always clues when girls tried to flirt or use their femininity on me in the Navy. I just did not noticed.)

Lol…STD check’s at the doctors office. Always get weird looks when I say I am not sexual active.

Yes, I have an asexual flag and an equal sign on my car.

And yes my sexual orientation is confusing to a lot of people and not something I share with casually acquaintances but do not hide it.

There are times when I think being asexual is not that different than being allosexual. But than something happens. I do not get a joke or notice someone people find “hot”. And am not interested in coupling up. I would like a partner. But still have my own space.

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I don't ever have intruding thoughts of sex or romantic attraction.

 

Romantic and sexual feelings (on my part, anyway) never cause problems with my friendships.

 

I don't really care that no guy who's seen me in person has so much as looked at me twice - in fact, I'm glad not to get that kind of (unwanted) attention.

 

I can focus on and enjoy other things rather than dwelling on the fact that I don't have a romantic relationship.

 

I can enjoy a movie for what it is and focus on the plot rather than being distracted by how attractive a particular actor is.

 

Never having to go through a breakup.

 

I've never had to have a gynecological exam since I'm young-ish and not sexually active (though I know eventually my age will mean that I should have one anyway).

 

Missing a period doesn't mean I could be pregnant (it just happens sometimes because I'm irregular). 

 

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Looking at what some of my friends go through, I think that I've been spared a great deal of emotional upheaval by not caring about sex or romance.  I know I'm probably missing out on some things, but there's no way to have the fullness of all human experience in one lifetime anyway.

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I appreciate 0, 1 and 10 the most, but relate with every point. It's just great that I don't have to get into that social game called "how to make them notice me". I can be exactly what I want to be and no need to change myself for anyone (done that enough in the past due to societal pressure, before I found out about aroace). 

 

I'd also add, it's nice to view all the people the same way, and not based on whether they're a possible date or not. I mean, a good friendship doesn't suddenly stop when attraction comes into way, I'm equally honest to everyone and won't be more forgiving to someone just because I'm attracted to them etc. It just feels nice to have everyone on the same line and no favoring or discraging people based on my subjective attraction towards them. Age won't make me to appreciate person less, or gender, appearance, wealth etc. 

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I like that I don’t have to meet strangers in bars and make it my One Primary Aim to have sex with them.

 

I like that I have absolutely zero in-built interest in certain popular disgusting sex acts (disclaimer: I personally can tolerate some sex acts).

 

I like that there’s never a risk I’ll cheat in a relationship.

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Janus the Fox
2 hours ago, Iam9man said:

I like that I don’t have to meet strangers in bars and make it my One Primary Aim to have sex with them.

It's a hard concept to grasp myself.  It's one think having sex with someone that you know very well for a long time, and then there's total strangers, I don't see the appeal ace or sexual. 🤔

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On 1/12/2020 at 5:46 PM, mexicanpotato said:

Number 5 is one of my favorites

Also, having Valentine's day as a normal day and have nothing to worry about is great

 

Or as we call it in my household, "Passover."

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