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Nowhere Girl

Paper by Kristina Gupta about the "sex for health" discourse

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Nowhere Girl

https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007%2Fs10912-010-9129-x

A quote, also to remind that (shhh...) bypassing paywalls is possible:

Quote

The sex-positive activists were certainly quick to embrace a universal “sex is good” message, and the reporters often embellished the scientific data and avoided any kind of critical analysis. Yet, the problems are also evident in the scientific literature. Most of the studies used nationally unrepresentative samples to test the correlation between one narrow measure of sexual activity and one narrowly defined health outcome; yet the scientists involved have simultaneously suggested, either implicitly or explicitly, that their results have practical implications for social policy and/or clinical practice. Perhaps it is time to think about fundamentally changing the terms of the discourse, instead of simply reversing its terms. We may want to argue that different activities can be healthy for different people, and that some types of sexual activity, depending on the context, can promote health. This might serve to open up more space for different types of sexual expression, while simultaneously decreasing societal pressure to have sex.

 

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Serran

I mean, seems like common sense that sex is only healthy if it is a positive experience for the person. Otherwise instead of lessening stress, it causes it. 

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Evobessive

That makes sense, there shouldn't be any shame about sex either way, you shouldn't be shamed for wanting to have sex (unless it's not consensual of course) but neither should you be shamed for not wanting to, saying that you're somehow unhealthy and need to be fixed. It's nice to see people realising this, thanks for sharing. 😁

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GlamRocker

I can say this... I don't have any trigger to make me remember to masturbate, but I TRY to do it at least every few days because I believe it's a very effective stress reliever. Sometimes when I'm at work, feeling a bit tense, I think, "Oh, if I'd remembered to do it today, maybe it would have took some of the edge off of this." Maybe I've drank the kool aid! I don't know. But I'm TOTALLY convinced that masturbation is good for my husband, he has more of a discernible libido.

 

I know this isn't sex, though, like the article and this thread is really about. As for that, I only believe it's good for people who have the emotional need for it. But it still comes with so many risks... plenty of which I think could be eliminated if the still present hatred of women all over the world got its ass kicked. That does seem to be the number one reason why societies are still trying to "punish" for having had sex, aka trying to keep totally effective birth control from people. Because, for some reason, a TON of people the world over can't stand the thought of women having consequence-free sex whenever they so please. I personally believe this is one of the sources of hatred of lesbians, as well.

 

Some STD risk may never be fully eliminated... like crabs lol... how would you design a vaccine for crabs? But I'll bet many of the others could have vaccines made, like for herpes. I don't know about HIV, though. Would it be in ANY WAY POSSIBLE to make such a vaccine?

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Nowhere Girl
44 minutes ago, Serran said:

I mean, seems like common sense that sex is only healthy if it is a positive experience for the person. Otherwise instead of lessening stress, it causes it. 

Sure, but it also seems to me that at least some people who are so eager to promote the idea how healthy sex supposedly is, find it hard to believe that there are people who don't like and/or don't desire sex. They are totally drenched in sexual normativity. So from their point of view it would seem absurd to think of sex as "causing stress instead of lessening it"...

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Galactic Turtle

It definitely seems to be that the overwhelming message that you must be in touch with yourself or with others sexually in order to be considered a healthy individual though I never know if people mean that in a physical sense or in a mental sense. I can 100% say that I am not in touch with myself sexually as in I have never felt erotic pleasure. Because of this it is the assumption that I am suffering, I presume, mentally but this has always been my normal. It would be good to recognize that everyone has a different base line at the very least.

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AceMissBehaving

It would be interesting to see the results of similar testing within the asexual community.


I feel the time I spent a while back with full emotional intimacy, physical closeness and sex 100% off the table, was the most blissfully at peace I’ve ever felt. Once the figuring out how to start working sex back into the relationship happened that constant background stress came back.

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Snao van der Cone

Just like with fad diets, which might not be the right approach for an individual's nutritional needs, and which are often done for the wrong reason (i.e. strictly to lose weight and not to gain stability or regularity), declaring that a certain amount of sex is necessary for one's health could backfire for a lot of people. "If only I had an active sex life, THEN I would be happy" is a toxic message/attitude, and I went through that myself. I hated myself for not having sex on the reg. I've luckily since come to my senses (obviously) and figured out what I want and need and what's healthy for me. Luckily I don't get lectures on that from people or doctors or whomever, but the message is still unfortunately out there for people who haven't yet built that confidence in what they really want.

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Whore*of*Mensa

I'm not sure whether any research has really tried to separate sex from emotional intimacy and physical closeness - some of the benefits of sex could be linked to those rather than sex itself? Not to mention the feeling of fitting a social norm...

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Philip027

This just goes to show how useless so many "studies" are.  The vast majority just state the bloody obvious.  Of course sex is going to be seen as having a positive impact on people, because most people want it.  Most people are happier when they get the things they want.  Kids -- hell, babies -- have figured this out.  You haven't discovered anything revolutionary.

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Nowhere Girl
3 hours ago, Galactic Turtle said:

I can 100% say that I am not in touch with myself sexually as in I have never felt erotic pleasure. Because of this it is the assumption that I am suffering, I presume, mentally but this has always been my normal. It would be good to recognize that everyone has a different base line at the very least.

And perhaps it means that you are in touch with yourself sexually? You understand that you don't need sex and are not trying to lie to yourself that you must actually need it "because everyone does".

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RoseGoesToYale

One thing people seldom bring up is that sex is also a capitalist industry. Capitalism makes so much profit off of sex it's insane, sometimes to the point where sex ceases to be an intimate activity altogether. And I'm not even talking about sex as an advertising tool. When people have sex, they buy lots of things... condoms or other forms of protection, birth control meds, sex toys, artificial lubricants, lingerie, books and magazines about how to better your sex life, Viagra, HIV prevention meds. Even industries that profit of of the possibility two people will have sex, and those industries aim to increase that possibility by any means necessary... makeup, sexy clothing, perfume/cologne, body hair removal, breast implants, anti-aging products.

 

The economy quite literally needs us, to use what my medical sociology professor said, "to f*** until you die." If people started having any lesser amount of sex, all of these industries would take a hit. It makes you wonder why health professionals push the benefits of sex so hard.

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RoseGoesToYale

Also, kind of silly, but this discussion made me think of this one quote from the Golden Girls.

Spoiler

Dorothy: "Honey, we know dieting is hard, we've all been there. I remember the time Stan and I went on that "Weight Loss Through Sex" diet, the idea being every time you felt hungry you would substitute food with some sexual activity."

Blanche: "Did it work?"

Dorothy: "I gained 18 pounds!"

 

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DarkStormyKnight

Articles like this make me feel better about where the sex-positive movement is going. :) 

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Homer

Moved to Asexual Musings And Rantings

Homer

Moderator World Watch

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Davida
On 11/3/2019 at 10:17 AM, Galactic Turtle said:

It definitely seems to be that the overwhelming message that you must be in touch with yourself or with others sexually in order to be considered a healthy individual though I never know if people mean that in a physical sense or in a mental sense. I can 100% say that I am not in touch with myself sexually as in I have never felt erotic pleasure. Because of this it is the assumption that I am suffering, I presume, mentally but this has always been my normal. It would be good to recognize that everyone has a different base line at the very least.

@Galactic Turtle, I just want to affirm your wellness and wholeness. Bless you. For myself, it MUST be in a mental sense as I have never felt so in touch with my sexuality (and free of generalized anxiety) as I have since realizing I'm asexual. 

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kiaroskuro
On 11/4/2019 at 12:19 AM, RoseGoesToYale said:

Also, kind of silly, but this discussion made me think of this one quote from the Golden Girls.

  Hide contents

Dorothy: "Honey, we know dieting is hard, we've all been there. I remember the time Stan and I went on that "Weight Loss Through Sex" diet, the idea being every time you felt hungry you would substitute food with some sexual activity."

Blanche: "Did it work?"

Dorothy: "I gained 18 pounds!"

 

LOL 😂

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