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Can Someone Explain Aesthetic Attraction?


Sincerely, Iris

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Sincerely, Iris

Ok, so I mostly get it but I can't figure out if it's independent of romantic attraction or not. For example, I am 'attracted' to males and females but when I see a aesthetically attractive male, I end up being totally confused about it, because when I think about being romantically involved with a male, any male, my entire being says 'nO' just like it does with sex. 

But when I think about being romantically involved with a female, I... yes. 

Is it possible to be biaesthetic or something but only homoromantic? 

Sorry if that wasn't clear... but I'm really confused. 

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Internetlionboy

I experience aesthetic attraction and it's just basically you like seeing someone you find aesthetically pleasing but you wouldn't want to do anything with them like date or fuck them. Aesthetic and romantic attraction can come hand and in hand.

 

I think if you just like looking at someone but you wouldn't want to date or fuck them, then I think you could be just experiencing aesthetic attraction! Also you can totally use biaesthetic and homoromantic for yourself if that makes you most happy! I wish you luck on your questioning journey and know that you're valid no matter what ❤️

 

 

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I experience aesthetic attraction but no romantic. I see someone who looks great (or "hot" or whatever you want to call it), but I have absolutely no increased desire to so much as talk to them.

 

Being biasethetic and homoromantic sounds perfectly fine to me. Maybe confusing to some people, but I see nothing wrong with it. TONS of people find everyone hot but are only "really" attracted to one type.

 

One thing I would consider - and this isn't an area I'm experienced in - is that a lot (most?) bisexuals have an active preference for one gender. Leaning towards liking one more, at least. Which is also a totally valid thing. This doesn't sound like you, since you have no sexual attraction towards men, but it is something in the same ballpark.

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Internetlionboy

Basically you can call yourself an ace lesbian/ace homoromantic since it sounds like you don't experience either romantic or sexual attraction towards men (which I can totally relate as I'm the same way as I'm aroace but I'm dating an amazing guy who I feel strong platonic attraction towards so now I'm bi but I just say I'm orbisian/nblw as I'm more comfortable with broad terms ghsdhf) but you find both men and women aesthetically pleasing!

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Most people I know don't tend to label their asthetic attraction because it's platonic and entirely based on if the preson "looks nice". It's like looking at a painting or a well-designed cake or building. You appreciate and enjoy the way it looks, but if you were asked to kiss it you'd look at the asker and go "Why?" 

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Sincerely, Iris

Thanks. 

It's probably not really worth it to label my aesthetic attraction because it doesn't have anything to do with who I date... :)

 

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everywhere and nowhere

What does "orbisian" and "nlbw" mean??

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I've moved this thread from "Questions about Asexuality" to "Romantic and Aromantic Orientations".
 
Michael Tannock,
Open Mic moderator and Questions about Asexuality Co-moderator.

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12 minutes ago, Nowhere Girl said:

What does "orbisian" and "nlbw" mean??

Orbisian refers to a Nonbinary person who is attracted to females.

If by "nlbw" you mean "nblw", that's short for "Non-Binary Loving Women".

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@Sincerely, Iris I've only experienced Aesthetic Attraction twice in my 34 years of life, one of those times being towards a water fountain at an airport as a small child, and the other being towards a young woman when I was in my late teens.
I'm counting both of them because it was the same experience I had on those two occasions and only those occasions.

On those two occasions, it was different from just liking the way someone or something looks.
I was compelled to scan that fountain and that person with my eyes and think about how perfect their angles and proportions were.
So much so, that I lost awareness of everything else around me completely.
It was like the whole world fell away.
I'd even lost my parents at the airport when I'd become fixated on that water fountain because when I snapped out of it, I realised they had continued walking, and I never knew.
In the case of the young woman, I later heard whispers about us "checking each other out".
I don't know if that was true on her part, but thoughts of romance or sex never entered my mind.

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6 hours ago, Sincerely, Iris said:

Thanks. 

It's probably not really worth it to label my aesthetic attraction because it doesn't have anything to do with who I date... :)

 

Sounds good :)I don't do that either, because after all, aesthetic appreciation doesn't have anything to do with actual (romantic or sexual) orientation. What does it matter who I'm "aesthetically attracted" to, if it's not a person I'd potentially want to get involved with?

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  • 2 weeks later...
gemrisingbitch

Aesthetic attraction to me means that you are attracted to the beauty of the person, looks without necessarily seeing them in a sexual or romantic context. 

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