Meretseger Posted August 20, 2019 Share Posted August 20, 2019 New to...this. I'm usually on forums for just fun hobby related things but my life took a turn recently when I broke things off with my now ex after almost 8 years in a LDR. The relationship was a mistake, I really had myself fooled that we were okay because I was ignorant of relationships--it was my first serious one. I've never been interested in dating or sex during my highschool years--mind you I went through puberty and all the hormonal feelings but the most I ever did was fool around with a battery operated massager. I don't masturbate or at least never got anything out of my attempts, so I stopped trying. By the time I got to college I spent the entirety of it making new friends but thinking I didn't want to date because it would just be a distraction, and I didn't need sex so it was fine. I got confessed to by nearly everyone I got close to at some point, and I always just thought 'haha that's crazy, where is this coming from what's in the water', turning them down gently each time because I genuinely felt nothing back but friendship with these people, no matter the gender or personality. First boyfriend lasted all of a week before I deemed us just friends. First 'real' boyfriend lasted as long as he did I think, because of the distance. I only had to tolerate the touches and PDA and expectations of couple activities then, for a few weeks and then I'd be back home for a few more months, relying on video calls and the like for the rest of our interactions, which felt like easy going friendship. Never really got anything out of sex, nothing more than a few fleeting moments of pleasure but ultimately it always ends with me thinking 'That's what all the fuss is over?' It finally got to a breaking point for me when I realized how often I was just disregarding him as a priority when I got busy recently with other issues. I don't feel the same way he does at all and I didn't find it fair so I ended it--still currently navigating the fall out of that as he's very in love with me and not willing to really let go of the hope that i'll change my mind one day (and I can't help but cringe away at every declaration of love he belts out to show it because I don't understand romance and sex at all, I only like it in fictional settings.) so y'know, pray or make a blood sacrifice on my behalf that he falls in love with someone else and moves on--in the meantime I'm here, trying understand myself and all this better. S'been a long journey to admitting it so--Hi. Link to post Share on other sites
Custard Cream Posted August 20, 2019 Share Posted August 20, 2019 Hello and welcome. I hope you will find lots of new friends and support here. 🍰 Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted August 20, 2019 Share Posted August 20, 2019 @Meretseger Welcome to AVEN. I think you probably just found a great place for yourself. I know that I did when I joined a few days ago. My inbox is open for you any time you want. I’m a bit of an unusual guy so I may choose to both pray and make blood sacrifices on your behalf. Link to post Share on other sites
Lichley Posted August 20, 2019 Share Posted August 20, 2019 Welcome! Quote Location:Bottom of a dark pit full of viscous liquid Get out of the chocolate syrup, you’re meant to eat it not take a swim Link to post Share on other sites
Meretseger Posted August 21, 2019 Author Share Posted August 21, 2019 17 hours ago, CustardCream said: Hello and welcome. I hope you will find lots of new friends and support here. 🍰 Thank you~! I feel welcome already. 16 hours ago, A Grey So Dark said: @Meretseger Welcome to AVEN. I think you probably just found a great place for yourself. I know that I did when I joined a few days ago. My inbox is open for you any time you want. I’m a bit of an unusual guy so I may choose to both pray and make blood sacrifices on your behalf. Hey, I got no complaints on the method. It's appreciated, Thanks. @Lichley Don't limit me--Por que no los dos? Link to post Share on other sites
NickyTannock Posted August 27, 2019 Share Posted August 27, 2019 A very belated welcome to AVEN! Incidentally, it is a tradition here to welcome new members by offering cake, and here's a 'Dragon Ball' cake (all edible), http://cakesdecor.com/cakes/99478-dragon-ball-cake Link to post Share on other sites
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