Coming out to children

[Guest]

Has anyone ever done this? I would love to hear about anyone with older children who has managed to discuss asexuality with them. Or have you managed to come out to anyone without telling your kid (s)? 

 

Years ago, a friend told me her Dad had come out as trans, this was in the early 2000s and she was in her early 30s at the time, but it took some time for her to get used to. I don't feel like coming out as asexual to a child could be so upsetting (I mean, no kid wants to think about their parent a a sexual being anyway!) but I'm just not sure?

[Comrade Kitty]

I think I will tell my little bro, who is 10. But I don't think he will say much. He'll just be like "K". Then I'll say "DONT TELL MOM!". But honestly, if my parents told me that, I would be kinda happy. Just cause, as you said, no one wants to think about that. Are you asking if you should come out to a kid? Cause if you are, then I think the situation varies. If the kid is someone you are quite close too, like a sibling or idk, someone you talk to often, (this also depends on the age of the child) I'd say tell them. But if it's just some kid you see periodically, then you have no reason to at all. You don't have to come out to anyone, but if you want too, I see no harm in doing so.

[Skycaptain]

It's your choice. Personally I'd say there's no need to, unless they ask "when are you going to start dating". Maybe when you have "the talk" mention that asexuality exists. 

[Guest]

On 7/26/2019 at 3:57 AM, AuraKitty said:

I think I will tell my little bro, who is 10. But I don't think he will say much. He'll just be like "K". Then I'll say "DONT TELL MOM!". But honestly, if my parents told me that, I would be kinda happy. Just cause, as you said, no one wants to think about that. Are you asking if you should come out to a kid? Cause if you are, then I think the situation varies. If the kid is someone you are quite close too, like a sibling or idk, someone you talk to often, (this also depends on the age of the child) I'd say tell them. But if it's just some kid you see periodically, then you have no reason to at all. You don't have to come out to anyone, but if you want too, I see no harm in doing so.

I should have been clearer I meant coming out to my child, she's 17! 

She's asked me some questions as I'm single and she doesn't want me to be lonely! I think I'll stick with 'I'm happy on my own' for now.. 

[Guest]

On 7/26/2019 at 7:37 AM, Skycaptain said:

It's your choice. Personally I'd say there's no need to, unless they ask "when are you going to start dating". Maybe when you have "the talk" mention that asexuality exists. 

She does ask me that a lot. I might slip in the information about asexuality if anything comes up, she might work it out for herself one day but I guess there's no need to specifically say anything. 

[starweb]

I haven't said anything to my kids, but my daughter is pretty savvy and has a lot of LGBT friends (including her cousin) and she might start to wonder why mom loves the color combination of purple and gray so much (although I did like those colors before I knew what I was, so there's that).

 

But if I were to say anything to anyone, she would probably be the first, maybe the only.

[TimeDelay]

Allo here so if you'd rather only hear from aces just ignore/delete. I'd like my husband to tell our kids but he's not ready. I think it's important for children to know that it's okay and they'll be accepted, in case they are feeling confused themselves. It'd be good to find some kind of information on how to explain it to children though. Our 17yr old would be pleased I think as she has never identified as 'straight'. She is still exploring.

[dancewithme]

I was considering telling my oldest son, because he might have similar feelings since he never has had a girlfriend or boyfriend.