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I detest others defining me. They are almost always wrong.


nannihe

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:?: :?: :!: :idea: Like if they can't get you to respond as they feel you should to their idea... then they start calling you names or telling you who you are.

8) I haven't always figured out every moment who I am or where I'm off to and would rather keep some secrets. grin.

I was thrown... or allowed only to have boys as friends. They were approved. Girls were not. That means I hung out in the boys garages but of course not thier bedrooms... ha. I always thought that I was one of the boys except when we were to go to camping trips and I wasn't allowed as I was a girl. :? Yes, confusion. ha ... So I tended to have buddies and we worked on cars, computors, built sling shots, etc.

The girls were not encouraged to be friends and my parents were so nasty in their remarks about my girlfriends that I ... I avoided them rather than hear nasty remarks about them.

So I like friends/buddies. When I finally did have girlfriends, of course, my parents explained that I was too friendly with girls. Lesibian. Jerks. Now I have wanted to find my old buddies but their wives think I'm moving in on them.... ha. I just realized that I can't go there anymore... back to the past... too alarming and intrusive.

So were others defining you? I'm more as a Toltec... science and art agreements or disagreements.

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  • 2 weeks later...

8) Nannihe- yep, grew up with that (I am a very stocky female physiform, and think more male than neuter.) But - I learned, over the decades, that even the most stereotypical person knows they are not entirely that - I've seen male whanau being utterly maternal, and female whanau getting out there with the clubs & vengeance.

Humans are not only malleable - we are variable (as you noted nannihe)

-but hooray for a forum where these matters can be discussed - sans clubs!

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I to used to play with boys more, the difference between me and them that when I climbed a tree they would have to get my dad to get me down. I was allowed in there bedroom cus I did,nt know anything about sex until I was 18. When I finally did I asked my male friends why did,nt you try anything and they said they might of got a thick ear. I used to go camping and stay in there tent but as buddies. As I got older I was rejected by my friends boyfriends and eventually my friends just in case I took there other halves. It was a no win situation.But all through this I learnt to like my own company. I had lots of boyfriends when I was younger. But some thing was always missing. I had my fair share of tragedy from one boyfriend getting killed to anothers fists, so it was,nt for the want of trying. You might think that I sound like a loner but If you ever see a polite, fun loving, caring person making you laugh in a queue or running over to help you. That,s me

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I felt more comfortable around males than females, but my mother was an abusive FemBot, that to this day acknowledges that she allowed bad things to happen to me, but never apologized. Anyway, I felt safer around guys, perhaps that my father was a gentle soul (spineless, but gentle). I was a big tomboy too, but had no attraction to females (as in being a lesbian).

I was in the military for quite a number of years, and fit in just fine with the male atmosphere, as we developed a friendship. And yes, their wives or SO (Significant Others) always were leary of me. But we have a great friendship that maybe they were jealous of. Friendships I had with females were of a 'mean girl' nature and I just grew not to trust them at all. Even now, at age 53, what few friends I have are mostly male.

Be yourself...that's all we can ask!

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1. I heard this morning that Stedman Graham, Oprah's cutie pie wrote the book about this very subject. Over labeling people and putting them the box (cubical) so they can't get out.

2. Another new was that this woman stood up for the pope and said he should not appologize... sorry, forgot her name but I will have to add a yahoo search to my site. She said that he had every right to point out what they had already said about themselves. Did you think every spiritual leader never had a bad future?

3. Then on Dr. Phil's, REVENGE show, A Lawyer is whinning about women speaking out against his indescressions so of course he wants to put people back in the dark ages with LAWs to prevent freedom of speech and a new forum that he can't control. That's how the German's controlled others... they invented the word: SIN... where it didn't exsist before.

4. That's the problem... we've lost the freedom of speech. Darn. I hope blogs go on forever and we just block those that we don't want to hear. I was called an a__ h__ once by my then husband. I wasn't sure why but it was like a curse. You have to find out if you are. Rather than take hours, I called up his granny who raised him and told her he was coming to visit her real soon. She asked why? He needs to be brought up properly... he forgot his lessons of manners and called me a a__ H__. She spoke to him of course. Not everyone can send children back to their parents but sometimes you want to. unfortunately we allow the gov. to be our parents with laws. (by the way, I am hoping that they remove 8 laws from every org., group, govt. before they allow any one more.

5. Did you know that Darwin was correct? He was more correct than Jesus and at least he wrote his own words and didn't leave it up to others.

He spoke eloquently also.

6. Even Howard Stern has the right to speak but he's kinda old like me. Anyone younger out there have something to say more interesting that all the old people I mentioned? I do have to find her name.. the young one that spoke up for the pope.

7. my daughter and Eddie are tired of blk/white/yellow/blue/green/ peoples with all the variations... we like the word 'colored' as in 'colorful' and Eddie told me about a man who painted the most alive potrait of a European/american (sorry, Stedmon) and there was no white. It was beautiful. We are unique despite our shapes, and fondness for belonging.

p.s. I purposely do not watch TV but occassionally... but I sure hit on some interesting spots.

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