All the little Lights Posted June 2, 2019 Share Posted June 2, 2019 Does anyone else have fantasies about having someone as a friend? About long deep conversations and what you would tell them from your day and from your life and what you think? Or how you would hug someone and they would cuddle with you. It's so cute:-) I even dream such things sometimes! I just don't know how to talk to these people in real life anymore afterwards:-D Link to post Share on other sites
Dreamfield Posted June 2, 2019 Share Posted June 2, 2019 1 hour ago, All the little Lights said: Does anyone else have fantasies about having someone as a friend? About long deep conversations and what you would tell them from your day and from your life and what you think? I am longing for this, and probably the most important reason is that I used to have it. I have a new relatively close friend now (the friend is not so new, but the closeness is), but it is still not what I used to have. 1 hour ago, All the little Lights said: Or how you would hug someone and they would cuddle with you. I used to have this too and once you lose it, you miss it even more, at least in my case. This isn't necessarily aro, though. Until almost a decade ago, I thought I was aro and didn't long for the cuddly stuff. I entered a relationship because all my friends at that time were having too little time for friendship because they were dedicating it to their SOs. So I decided to find somebody too, in order to have a friend who will have more time for me. Once this started, we started cuddling and I discovered that I can experience romantic love. But I wish I didn't discover it. I miss it really bad right now. :/ Link to post Share on other sites
lowLifeLoner Posted June 2, 2019 Share Posted June 2, 2019 I'm not sure if I'm aro but practically all I think about is having deep meaningful convocation. I've never done the "cuddling" so I don't know about that. Link to post Share on other sites
All the little Lights Posted June 2, 2019 Author Share Posted June 2, 2019 4 minutes ago, lowLifeLoner said: I'm not sure if I'm aro but practically all I think about is having deep meaningful convocation. I've never done the "cuddling" so I don't know about that. Most interestingly, I had such fantasies and dreams before someone cuddled with me🤔 Link to post Share on other sites
All the little Lights Posted June 2, 2019 Author Share Posted June 2, 2019 15 minutes ago, Dreamfield said: I am longing for this, and probably the most important reason is that I used to have it. I have a new relatively close friend now (the friend is not so new, but the closeness is), but it is still not what I used to have. I used to have this too and once you lose it, you miss it even more, at least in my case. This isn't necessarily aro, though. Until almost a decade ago, I thought I was aro and didn't long for the cuddly stuff. I entered a relationship because all my friends at that time were having too little time for friendship because they were dedicating it to their SOs. So I decided to find somebody too, in order to have a friend who will have more time for me. Once this started, we started cuddling and I discovered that I can experience romantic love. But I wish I didn't discover it. I miss it really bad right now. 😕 Well, I also didn't have/cherish some of those fantasies for quite some time, but now they came back. Maybe you can also control it a little, by starting to think about it? I would recommend to try! Link to post Share on other sites
A. Sterling Posted June 2, 2019 Share Posted June 2, 2019 Yes, all the time. I don't know if it counts as aro or not. I generally I'm somewhere in between, just because I can't choose. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted June 2, 2019 Share Posted June 2, 2019 I'm not aromantic,but sometimes I have fantasies like this. Link to post Share on other sites
Bruce Wayne Posted June 2, 2019 Share Posted June 2, 2019 I don't know if I'm aro (maybe I just wasn't in love for a long time, idk) but I sometimes do have fantasies like that. Like going with a really great friend to cinema, then speaking about the movia, blah blah blah... Yeah. Link to post Share on other sites
Lunala Posted June 2, 2019 Share Posted June 2, 2019 Holy guacamole, these sort of thoughts are constantly on my mind! Glad to see I'm not alone. I keep getting vivid thoughts of how I want a special friend and how I want to be very close to them, and the constant urge to be able to hug them or whatever, because the thought of it gives me these really positive and warm feelings. Today I've been thinking of this a lot. I really hope that someday I find a special friend like this who I can hang with. Link to post Share on other sites
verymelancholic Posted June 2, 2019 Share Posted June 2, 2019 This is what's on my mind always. Either a QPR or simply a close platonic friend is what I desire, but I prefer girls than guys, because it helps having someone completely different from me, and the contrast is also good. But I won't reject having a guy as a friend. Cuddling though, that's a huge plus. Link to post Share on other sites
All the little Lights Posted June 2, 2019 Author Share Posted June 2, 2019 To everyone saying that they are not aro: I don't think you need to be anything to feel this:-) Does anyone have a better name for this feeling maybe? And I am glad that you can relate, and that I can:-) Link to post Share on other sites
WanderingKate Posted June 2, 2019 Share Posted June 2, 2019 For me, I wouldn't call it fantasizing...but when I think of my ideal future, I picture a relationship with someone that's somewhere between strong platonic and romantic...but mostly what I want and think about is someone to go on little mini-adventures with, walk around and explore and see movies and go to dinner with. So I guess in a way, while I don't actively daydream or fantasize about it, I absolutely have hopes for a strong platonic bond or QPR in my future. Link to post Share on other sites
Retriarch Posted June 2, 2019 Share Posted June 2, 2019 As someone who is aroace, I can say that I do have these fantasies. Sometimes I'll meet someone and just think to myself 'God, I wish I were really close friends with them" and then just imagine what that would be like. It's really good to know I'm not alone in this! Link to post Share on other sites
Destan Posted June 4, 2019 Share Posted June 4, 2019 I'm glad to know I'm not the only one now. I thought it was weird for me to do that haha. I had this a lot when I was younger and I still do now but not so much. Having fantasies about roleplaying together with other friends, playing games&sports, collaborating on a story, ... I too had dreams about it actually and they make me sad afterwards. This friend is always there for me when I'm in trouble. My wish is simply for a close friend who doesn't cast me aside for someone else and would hang out with me a lot. It would be nice if we had the same interests. I miss having conversations about that. Cuddling is a big no though because I'm touch-averse. Fist bumps and high fives are okay. Link to post Share on other sites
verymelancholic Posted June 5, 2019 Share Posted June 5, 2019 Take acid/smoke weed while listening to Pink Floyd with someone. Link to post Share on other sites
AspieAlly613 Posted June 6, 2019 Share Posted June 6, 2019 Just a friendly reminder that AVEN does not condone encouraging others to break the law, and doing so is a violation of the Terms of Service. Link to post Share on other sites
RakshaTheCat Posted June 10, 2019 Share Posted June 10, 2019 On 6/2/2019 at 7:12 PM, All the little Lights said: Does anyone else have fantasies about having someone as a friend? About long deep conversations and what you would tell them from your day and from your life and what you think? What kind of deep conversations do you like? Can practice them here, and maybe you can find someone that way 😺 Link to post Share on other sites
All the little Lights Posted June 10, 2019 Author Share Posted June 10, 2019 1 hour ago, Marcin said: What kind of deep conversations do you like? Can practice them here, and maybe you can find someone that way 😺 Oh it's always with specific people, and with most of them I am already friends with:-) Others are some kind of co-workers, I guess? Sometimes I also continue conversations in my head and think about the maaany things I'd still like to say:-) Link to post Share on other sites
Karst Posted June 10, 2019 Share Posted June 10, 2019 Personally, most of my fantasies involve going to space. *chuckles scientifically* Link to post Share on other sites
MissingZucchini Posted June 10, 2019 Share Posted June 10, 2019 Yeah I definitely have these fantasies sometimes. Im not aro but I will sometimes have these fantasies about friends that I already do have and about ones that I could have in the future. Currently there is one friend who I am constantly becoming better friends with and am really hoping it could reach this point someday! He is aro/ace and we work really well together on projects and at work Link to post Share on other sites
verymelancholic Posted June 11, 2019 Share Posted June 11, 2019 Driving late at night with the music blasting. Link to post Share on other sites
All the little Lights Posted June 11, 2019 Author Share Posted June 11, 2019 23 hours ago, Saw02 said: Yeah, I’ve had fantasies similar to this. Never actual dreams, just thoughts. About meeting someone and having the deepest friendship I’ve ever had and explaining to them how I’m aro ace and what that means for me specifically. And they just get it after some explaining. In a way that others don’t always get it. And then we’re friends and we talk and live life and have each other to confide in when things get difficult or if something exciting happens. We aren’t dating. We don’t cuddle or kiss or touch too much because I don’t care for that. A short hug every once in a while would suffice. But we are close on an intellectual level. But something like that seems kinda impossible. I’m glad I’m not the only one to think this though! That doesn't seem to impossible to me:-) Link to post Share on other sites
maybeimamazed Posted June 12, 2019 Share Posted June 12, 2019 On 6/2/2019 at 4:12 AM, All the little Lights said: Does anyone else have fantasies about having someone as a friend? About long deep conversations and what you would tell them from your day and from your life and what you think? Oh boy, do I ever... I've never had a best friend that also considered me their best friend and I want that so bad. And it is a fantasy, because those things usually lead to romance (or romance is what people want to jump into straight away) and that's just not what I want. Link to post Share on other sites
kiaroskuro Posted June 12, 2019 Share Posted June 12, 2019 On 6/2/2019 at 9:12 AM, All the little Lights said: I just don't know how to talk to these people in real life anymore afterwards:-D That's kind of cute Link to post Share on other sites
All the little Lights Posted June 17, 2019 Author Share Posted June 17, 2019 On 6/12/2019 at 3:38 PM, brehasolo said: Oh boy, do I ever... I've never had a best friend that also considered me their best friend and I want that so bad. And it is a fantasy, because those things usually lead to romance (or romance is what people want to jump into straight away) and that's just not what I want. I hope that you'll find something like this once:-) (not the romance, but the best friend thing) I also didn't have a best friend for a long time, and now I have more than just one:-) so there is hope! And being on AVEN is a good start:-) Link to post Share on other sites
Retcon_Gecko Posted June 21, 2019 Share Posted June 21, 2019 I'm pretty sure I'm not aro, but I still would love to have a friend I could just hug randomly and not have them think it's weird. I'd also really like to just put my head on their lap, or vice versa, or cuddle in bed together. Link to post Share on other sites
QueerAroAce Posted August 25, 2019 Share Posted August 25, 2019 Of course I do! Would never happen irl since they aren't the cuddling type. I dont think I'm aroace, definitely ace though. Link to post Share on other sites
Milah May Posted August 25, 2019 Share Posted August 25, 2019 I am aroace, but having a friend like that would be really nice, I don't have a close friend or a best friend and I kinda envy people who do, still on a search to find my best friend. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.